Page 65 of Worth the Want
Dad.
“Hello,” I answer.
“Hey, son. Do you have a minute?”
“Sure. What’s going on?”
“Well, the fence in the west pasture is down again, and I don’t usually like to bother you because you have Hazel, but Rhett is at the school today, and Alder’s on a call?—”
“You can always call me, Dad. What do you need?”
“The cows got loose, and I need someone to help me round them up.”
“Okay, just let me get Hazel’s bag, and I’ll head that way.”
“Thanks, son. I’ll see you in a little bit.”
I tap my screen, raising my head to see Indie looking at me.
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, I just need to go help my dad with some cows. I’ll have to cut our afternoon short.”
“Oh. Okay, that’s alright. We can make the bouquets another day,” she tells me smiling.
“I want Indie!” Hazel shouts.
“It’s okay, Hazey. I’ll be here when you get back, and I bet you’ll have fun with Grammy.” Her immediate response is to help Hazel feel better. She’s so good with her. My worries about her not wanting to be with someone who has a kid already have slowly begun to dissipate over the time I’ve known her. The doubt of her outgrowing me, wanting more, hangs over me. Remembering my own life at twenty-seven, Indiana’s maturity is already leaps and bounds what mine was, but still, I’m having a hard time shaking my uncertainty.
As we walk back to the house, Hazel’s walking ahead of us. I snag Indie’s hand in mine, needing the connection to her. She leans into me in response, pressing herself into my side. I’m not sure if it’s because our relationship is still new, but no matter how much she touches me, kisses me, looks at me, it’s never enough. I can’t get close enough to her.
“You know, and there’s absolutely no pressure here, but if Hazel wanted to, I could keep her here, and we could finish our afternoon,” she hedges quietly, making sure not to let Hazel overhear. The thought of her hanging out with Hazel while I’m gonedoesn’tstrike fear in my heart like it might’ve even a few months ago. It’s just that I’ve never left her with anyone who isn’t family, and it’s not a concept I’m familiar with.
“I wouldn’t want to put you out. I’m not sure how long I’ll be gone,” I tell her, still unsure if I can relinquish this little bit of control I have. Hazel is the most precious thing in my life. Everything that involves her is a direct line to my heart. It’s only ever been us, and she’s only ever been my responsibility—solely.
“You know it’s not like that for me. I love spending time with Hazel, but I also understand if you’re not there yet, Knox.I can be patient. I’ve got time—a lot more than you, old man.” She bumps her hip against me, and it’s in this moment I know I want all my days to be like this. Her beside me, teasing me and wanting to spend time with my daughter. Care for us like I’m dying to care for her.
“Hey, Hazey. Do you want to stay here with Indie today until I get back?”
“Yes! Yes, yes!” she chants, twirling in a circle as we make it to the edge of the yard before yelling, “Fairy garden!” and running to check on her little moss houses.
A hand at my chest stops me. Looking down into Indie’s warm, brown eyes, I note her smile. Her lips are stretched ear to ear as she reaches up to remove my ball cap, putting it back on my head backward. With one hand, she crooks her finger, motioning me to come closer before sealing her mouth to mine in a kiss. It’s brief but still travels down to my toes, promising me more later.
“Thank you, Knox.”
I smile against her mouth. “Shouldn’t I be thanking you? You’re the one babysitting.” She shakes her head at me.
“That’s not what I’m doing, and I don’t want you to think of it like that.”
“Then I won’t.”
“That easy, huh?”
“Yeah, Indie Baby. You want it, you got it.”
“Oh really? Well, in that case, should I make a list or…?” I swat her on the ass, and she giggles as she runs toward Hazel with me chasing after her. When she gets there, she picks Hazel up, spinning her around once before facing me again.
“Alright you two, I’m heading to Grammy and Grandpa’s. I’ll see you in a little bit. Hazel, make sure Indie doesn’t doanything too silly, will you?” I place a kiss to Hazel’s cheeks and then a quick one to Indie’s mouth.
