Page 66 of Worth the Want
“We both got kisses!” Hazel announces.
“Is that okay with you, dragonfly?” I ask, worried she may not like sharing my attention when she’s never had to before.
“Yes!” she says, then grabs Indie’s face, pulling her in for a kiss as well. Indie’s smile is brilliant, shining a light on the reservations I may still be harboring.She wants this now, but will she change her mind?
“We’ll be fine, Daddy. Won’t we, Hazey?”
“Yes!” her little voice rings out, giggling.
With the vision of them both chasing butterflies in the yard, I make my way to my parents, already in a hurry to get back to my girls.
Heading back down the familiar driveway, my lights shine on the road in front of me. It took longer to get the cows back behind the broken fence, and even longer to mend that. I sent a text to Indie, and she only replied with a picture of her and Hazel both holding up their thumbs. That was almost two hours ago, and when I texted twenty minutes ago to say I was headed home, I didn’t get a message back. I’m sure there’s a good reason, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little nervous about it.
Taking my key out of the ignition and hopping out, I look in the bed of my truck at the chair I brought home. I was going to set it out when I got here, but the urge to get inside and check on Indie and Hazel is too strong. Practically running up thestairs, I unlock the front door and slowly open it. It’s dim, a few lamps and the glow of the TV are the only light. I hang my keys up on the hook and slip my boots off.
I take a step, wondering if maybe she’s putting Hazel to bed, when a small, high-pitched whine has my eyes cutting to the floor in front of the couch.Sally?What is she doing in the house?My eyes adjust slightly, and I freeze. The sight before me alleviates the tension that’s built in my shoulders. It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
Indie is lying on her back, one hand hanging off the edge of the couch by Sally, her face is relaxed in sleep, but the ghost of a smile pulls at the corner of her lips. Her other arm is resting on Hazel’s back, hand gently placed to the side of her tiny head in a comforting way, holding her close in her sleep like she can’t help it. I step closer, then catch a whiff of myself.Shit. I smell awful.
I’m as quiet as I can be walking to the bathroom; the bouquets they made catch my attention as I strip off my dirty clothes, tossing them in the laundry before attempting to take the quickest shower I’ve ever taken in my life. Once I’m under the warm spray, my mind wanders. My thoughts drifting to the fact that if I had taken Hazel with me, I’d still be getting her settled in bed instead of showering off this offending smell. It’s really fucking nice to have Indie here.
I’ve never had someone to depend on who wasn’t my family. And while I’m grateful I have them, that Hazel has them, having something—someone—just for me, is a pleasure I’m just realizing I’ve been missing. I haven’t thought about anything but Hazel in so long, I’d forgotten what it feels like to want something for myself.
Stepping out of the shower, I grab my towel off thebar and dry my body, wrapping it around my waist. I step into the hall and find Indie backing out of Hazel’s room, closing the door behind her. I lean against the doorframe to watch her try to move as quietly as she can.
“Hey,” I whisper.
Her head whips to me before she smiles, pressing a hand to her throat like she may have been stifling a yelp. “Hey,” she whispers back.
“Did I wake you up?” I ask.
She shakes her head at me, looking sleepy and beautiful and like I want her to be mine. “I needed to let Sally out. Sorry I didn’t answer your last text. We fell asleep watchingThe Little Mermaid.”
“That’s okay. Did you guys have a fun evening?” Her sleepy smile gets bigger at my question.
“We had a blast. After making our bouquets, we painted some dancing dinosaurs. I made mac and cheese for dinner because that was her request and because I don’t know how to make much else. I tried to make enchiladas once, and…” While she speaks her arms float around with her voice in the hall. I could watch her tell a story all day, which is about how long her stories tend to take.
“How did that go?” I ask.
“It’s a long story.” She sighs.
“Tell me anyway.”
She blushes, ducking her head slightly. “I should probably get home. It’s late.”No. I don’t want her to leave.
“Stay.”
“The night? With Hazel here? Are you sure?”
“Come to bed with me, Indie Baby. I want you with me tonight.”I want you with me always.
She nods, and I hold out my hand for her. With her hand in mine, I lead her down the hall and through my bedroom door. As we lay in the bed, gentle kisses, legs entwined with one another’s, hands gliding over exposed skin, I hear Indie’s breathing slow—feel her heartbeat sync with my own. Whatever this is, and I think I have a pretty good idea, I need to make sure we’re on the same page. Indie may be young, and I have no doubt she could find someone her own age, but I’ll make her happy as long as she’ll let me.
I just need her to want me back.
Sunlight streams in from the window, and I watch the dust motes dance in the beams. My lips stretch wide, remembering that I’m once again waking up in Knox’s house, only this time it’s not the guest room I wake up in, it’s in his bed. Working to school my expression, I turn over to find the bed empty.Huh. Well, that seemed like it was going to be a lot more romantic in my head.
Standing from the bed, I slip into my shorts that Knox slid off me last night, blushing at the memory. We did little more than kiss while our hands explored each other, but if kissing Knox feels likethat,then sex with him might very well kill me. My cheeks grow hotter at the thought.I’m going to have to tell him I’m a twenty-seven-year-old virgin.It’s not like I haven't had the opportunity, I’ve just never wanted more with anyone.Before him.Now I can’t imagine not wanting everything he’ll give me.
