Page 26 of All In
“I think you’re right. Can I borrow your phone?”
I called Rufus, the owner of Le Chacal and told him I was too sick to play the next night. Sudden laryngitis. Thanks to my hoarse voice, he sounded only mildly irritated at the last-minute cancellation.
“And Rufus?” I said, before we hung up.
“Yeah?”
“Tell Big E I said thank you. He’ll know what for.”
I called the other clubs, telling them I was sick and would let them know when I was able to come back.
If I come back,I thought.
I handed Theo’s phone back to him. “When do you need to get back to Vegas?”
“I was thinking I’d fly back Sunday night,” Theo said, cleaning up the remnants of our food. “Sound okay?”
I nodded. “Of course.”
Honestly, the thought of being alone scared the shit out of me. I’d only been fully sober—and not ravaged by withdrawals—for half a day. Theo was here for two more, so I decided to allow myself those two days to figure my shit out. I was too tired, too mentally and physically exhausted to do anything yet anyway.
“Tomorrow I might be up to showing you around New Orleans,” I said. “Right now, I’m so tired. Do you want to watch a movie?”
“Sure. I don’t know if you remember, butDirty Dancingis making the rounds on cable. That’s 80’s right?”
I smiled. “A classic. I’d love to give it another try.”
He turned on my small flat screen and found the movie On Demand.
“I didn’t even know I had cable,” I said.
“That means you’ve been paying your bills,” Theo said.
“Yeah, I guess I have,” I said.
Theo sat on the couch, arms along both sides of the back, legs spread out. I curled tight in the chair, but it wasn’t comfortable, and that old longing to touch and be touched was fierce in me. My body felt small and fragile, and needing the protective embrace of another human being. I cursed myself for being so pathetic. Theo had seen me at my worst—hysterical and sick, naked and puking—and had held me through it all. I felt hesitant to ask for more. Or maybe it felt hard to ask nowbecauseI was sober.
I asked anyway.
“Teddy?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you mind if I sit with you?”
He looked over at me. Something gentle passed over his eyes, then melted down his features, softening all the hard edges.
“If you want.”
He scooted to one side, and I curled up beside him. Not touching him, but nearly. I could feel the warmth of his body and smell the clean scent of his skin. Right around the time Baby and Johnny were practicing the lift in the lake, my head began to droop, and my eyes kept falling shut.
“Come here.” Theo put his arm around me. He sank lower into the cushions, making a pillow of his chest. His hand reached to pull the blanket from the back of the couch and drape it over my legs.
“Sleep,” he said.
I sighed, melted against him, and drifted away on the lake.
CHAPTER
