Page 66 of All In
Yvonne pursed her lips and peered down at me over her goggles.
I laughed and slung my arm around her. “I mean best friend from my old life. You’re my BFF from my new life.”
“That's better.” She took aim at another cabinet. “And does your other best friend also go out on dates?”
“He says he’s not seeing anyone serious, but I’m sure he must go out. You’ve seen him, right?”
“I have. He’s sex on a stick.”
I nearly lost my balance, and a flush of heat swept over my face. “Yvonne!”
“Isn’t he?”
“He’s…handsome.”
Yvonne snorted. “My grandfather was ‘handsome.’ My grandmother too, come to think of it.”
“I admit, he’s sexy,” I said. “He probably has many manly urges to satisfy and many women to help him.”
“There it is again.”
“What?”
“That sad look on your face is back.”
“What? Stop. It’s…probably jealousy. I have urges too, you know. I haven’t had sex in forever. But I’m not sure this date with Matt is a good idea.”
“Why not?”
“A date with an unknown guy makes me feel like everything I had with Jonah was…disposable. As if all I have to do is wait until enough time goes by andboom.I’m back in the saddle.”
“What more is there?” Yvonne asked.
“I don’t know,” I said. “But I feel like… I can’t follow up being with Jonah by doing something as superficial asdating.Trying out different guys to see if they fit. Kissing them, maybe even sleeping with them, only to break up a week later because it turns out he’s still not over his ex, or he’s not into ‘getting serious,’ or he hates dogs.”
Yvonne quirked her brow. “Hates dogs?”
“You know what I mean,” I said. “All the bullshit that comes with dating. I can’t do it. Not after Jonah. What we had was beyond special. What comes next needs to be special too. Going on one date already feels like a betrayal. It would be a million times worse if I did it over and over again, one stranger after another.”
“Theo’s no stranger.”
I stopped what I was doing and gave her a look.
Yvonne held up her hands. “He’s cute. He’s tatted up, like you. He’s obviously a good man for flying out here to help you like he did. And you two are close. You share a common pain.”
“Yes, because he’s Jonah’s brother,” I said quietly.
“So?”
“So?” My eyebrows shot up. “So that’s…I mean, he’s…”
Yvonne leaned on her hammer. “Yessss? Have you thought about it? Maybe just a little?”
I shook my head. “No. Well, maybe.”
She pursed her lips.
“Okay, yes. Fine, I think about it. I think about him constantly. My favorite part of the day—besides talking to you—is my phone calls with him. But I can’t tell if our friendship is really strong or if I’m just clinging to him for comfort.”
