Page 10 of Falling for Ezra Thomas
“Ez, shh. Calm down and take a breath.”
Who knows what else I was about to say, but she interrupts me by pressing her palm to my cheek and shifting to look up at me. This way, there’s a vulnerability to her I’veneverseen before. Lorelai is practical. She’s solid, trustworthy, and a leader. But now, it’s almost as if she’s showing me inside for the first time,letting me into the quietest, most hidden places of her heart that no one else gets to have. The parts that are fragile, delicate, and prone to destruction if one is not careful.
“Ezra,whatis happening here? Tell me what youwantand maybe we can meet somewhere in the middle. You have to talk to me. I’m the same Lorelai, even if the stakes are higher.” Her dark hair is tangled in my fingers, but she doesn’t seem to mind.
I’m comfortable with her. I don’t want to leave this sofa, and if I do, I want it to be because we’re going somewhere together. I want to date her, to spend all of my time getting to know this new and different side of her.
I offer a shrug. “If I didn’t have to leave—”
“Pretend you’re not,” she says, eyes focused on me. “Pretend we kissed and you don’t have to go anywhere. Then what?”
“Then I’d ask you on a date. I’d fill your calendar with as many of them as you’d let me have, and I’d spend all my free time learning the things about you that I don’t already know.” I can’t believe the words slipped out, but here they are, sitting between us out in the open. “But Iamleaving. I can’t take you out like you deserve. I can’t treat you to dinner and shopping and all the other things Beck does for Viv. We wouldn’t see each other for months, maybe even years at a time.”
Lorelai shifts until she’s sitting upright beside me and her game face is on. This is the Lorelai I’m used to. The no holding back, all the cards on the table woman. Her brow furrows, and she bites the inside of her cheek. The way she’s moved from one emotion to another is whiplash inducing, but I like this. I like that she seems on a mission even though I have no way of knowing what is about to happen.
“I’m not Vivien. That’s the first thing we need to get clear. She’s my sister, sure, and we have a lot in common, but not everything. We’re different women, and you can’t expect me to behave like her.”
“Right, and I wouldn’t want you to. That doesn’t mean—”
She grins and leans over to kiss me. Well, a guy can get used to getting shut up like this. I’m just about to deepen the kiss and calculate how many years I’d have to spend in prison for going AWOL when she pulls back.
“Like Iwassaying, we’re sisters and have a lot in common, but we’re still different. I have a question,” she says. “Do I get a say in how this thing between us goes, or have you already decided for me?”
“What do you mean?” I shift forward, ready to hear what’s on her mind.
“Are you allowed to call or write letters or email while you’re at basic training?” she asks.
“It’s limited, but yes. I can write all I want, but phone calls are once a week. No electronics, so I can’t email. It really depends on the instructor, but there are some options.”
Lorelai bites her lip and gets a faraway look in her gorgeous eyes. Her hair cascades over her shoulders and her thick lashes brush the top of her cheeks with each blink. It isn’t like I never noticed how pretty the sisters are. Ididhave a crush on Vivien once upon a time, but it was nothing like this. Lorelai is suddenly the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met, and her entire essence pulls me in. My mind is getting too hazy, slipping into that euphoria that tells me to throw everything out the window and just sit here kissing her all day.
“You know, wecandate through letters,” she says. Her cheeks redden and she looks away.
Wait. What? My back stiffens and I shift sideways to face her. “You’d want to do that? Write letters and do some kind of long-distance thing?”
“Well, it isn’t like I don’t know you. I probably know more about you than I should. Our letters won’t be the superficial getting to know you stuff. They could be so much deeper thanthat, so yeah. I think we could do it. It might even be romantic, actually. If you’d want to, of course.”
I love the way her cheeks get redder and redder, but it proves she has feelings for me too. She wants this as much as I do no matter how surprising and out of the blue it is, and if we have to go about it in an untraditional way, then so be it.
“You know, it’s actually not that unusual. Men and woman used to write to each other all the time. My grandparents did it when my grandpa was drafted,” I say. Adrenaline courses through my body when she smiles.Whendid she turn into this exquisite woman sitting beside me? Weeks ago, she was Lorelai. My friend. Vivien’s sister. And now, I’m at a loss for words when she looks at me the way she is right now, smiling with eyes alight and cheeks aglow, ready to leap into a crazy new adventure with me.
“I actually know that. Your Grandma told me a few Christmases ago. So see, we aren’t starting from scratch here. We can dig deep and really connect while you’re gone. It’s easier to do that in written letters than face to face anyway, right? Or am I crazy?” she asks.
“Crazy? What do you mean by that?”
She lowers her gaze again and pulls her legs up. Closing herself off a little. “Crazy for wanting to do this? I mean, a few kisses can’t suddenly make a relationship out of nothing, but I haven’t stopped thinking about you since that night, Ezra.”
I reach for her and pull her back against my chest. “It’s like you said though. It’s not really out ofnothing.We’ve been friends for a long time, so if you’re crazy, then so am I. You’ve had me questioning my future since that night, and I definitely want to see where this leads.” And in my family, that means something. She knowsthattoo. Diving into this long-distance, letter writing romance with me only confirms what I had hoped before. She’sin as deep as I am. She has feelings for me that go beyond friendship, and she’s looking for commitment. Long term.
Lorelai settles her head on my chest with a contented sigh. “I hate that you’re leaving, but I think we can figure this out. If that’s what you want.”
I take a deep breath and kiss the top of her head. “It is. Is it what you really want?”
She snuggles deeper and wraps her arms around my torso while I hug her tight. “Yeah, I think so. This is the most relaxed I’ve been in months. It feels right. I’m…ateasewith you.”
“Me too,” I admit and hope the feeling only grows.
We’ll figure this out. Yeah. I trust her. I believe her. But now I have to tell the rest of my family, and that is going to be the first test of our stability.
