Page 19 of Falling for Ezra Thomas
He palms my cheek and brushes a tear from under my eye. “I hate it too. I feel like I barely have a grasp on this and it might get yanked away while I’m gone.”
“I meant it when I said I wanted to do this, Ez. I’m just going to miss you so much, and I’m already spiraling because of quitting my job.”
“I’m sorry I have to leave. I wish things were different, but I can’t change it.”
I sigh and relax further against the wall. “I know, but if this is something you have prayed about and are convicted to do, then who am I to tell you that you shouldn’t for my sake? It’s unfair to be selfish about this merely because it’s a bad time for me.”
Ezra stands straight as if I’ve kicked him. “Is this too much for you right now? Am I…am I pushing you into something you don’t want or aren’t ready for?”
“No, no that’s not it. Please don’t think that. I’m only afraid like you are, that’s all.”
He leans against the wall with one arm and rests his forehead against mine. “I promise you the whole time I’m gone, I will be thinking about you, praying about our relationship, andinvesting in what our future can be when I get back. I realize that might be intimidating, but you’ll just have to talk to Vivien about it and get used to being relentlessly pursued, Lorelai Mays. Don’t forget, I’m as driven as you are when I set my mind on a goal.”
His breath is minty like the soft peppermint candies his mother stocked in crystal bowls on every table. I have no idea how many he’s eaten, but the sweetness washes over me and offers a sort of odd calmness I desperately need. I close my eyes and wrap my arms around his neck, drawing him as near as possible.
“Kiss me so I can’t forget this moment while you’re gone,” I whisper and leave myself in his hands. I trust him. I care about him. And more than anything, I want to believe him when he says he’s all in with me.
I have hope now, a light at the end of a long, dark tunnel, and if I’m lucky, the rest of my life will sort itself out in the coming weeks. I want to be ready for dating a Thomas brother and all that comes with it, so I set my sights on getting through one day at a time, taking it as God lays out the groundwork.
In the meantime, I kiss him and let all of my troubles wash away. His gentle movements prove that letting go isn’t a foolish action, but maybe the best decision I’ve made in a long time. My whole life has been full speed ahead, but now, the slow sweetness of his kisses soothes me, comforts me, and gives me the support I need to face tomorrow without him.
Chapter Eleven
Ezra
Silas offers me asupportive pat on the back, reminding me that I’m not the only one who has faced this scenario. My mother is full on snot crying on my shoulder, and I am reminded that I am an absolute jerk for doing this to her. I should have told them all weeks ago, given us time for proper goodbyes.
“Honey, we have to go. It’s a seven-hour drive, and I want to get ahead of morning traffic,” Dad says.
My whole family—extended to include the Mays, Nadines, and Marshalls…and the whole town—surrounds us as my father waits for my mother to relinquish me to the United States government. And I’m not so sure it’s going to happen.
Even the morning paper glared at her when she opened it this morning.
Coldstone Creek’s Ezra Thomas joins the Army!
The headline plastered on the front page led to an article about my parents’ bakery being a staple and fixture of the town and allabout their ten boys, ending with me, the soldier on his way to make our little town proud.
Or kill my mother. Whichever happens first.
Even Beck and Vivien are taking it better than I anticipated, but I have a feeling it’s to make my life easier. Lorelai stands beside her parents, purposely not making eye contact with anyone but me. I think if she does, the tears will come, and she’ll feel guilty. I want to kiss her again, remind her of all the promises I made to her last night on our walk home, and guarantee the only thing that will happen while I’m gone is a whole lot of falling in love with her.
There’s no way I can’t fall. In only a couple of days, I’ve come to realize how much she means to me.
“They better be nice to you,” Mom says, finally releasing me.
“Pretty sure the point of basic training is to break them,” Novan teases but zips his mouth when Dad glares at him.
“I’ll behave myself, Mom. They won’t have a reason to be unusually cruel.” I hope that’s true, but anything can happen.
Once everyone has given me a last goodbye hug, Vivien steps forward. I open my arms to my best friend and let her fall into them with a huge sigh. “I’m going to miss you. I can’t believe I have to keep Beck straight all by myself.”
I chuckle and hug her tighter. “You signed up for it. No one forced you to fall in love with my grumpy brother and marry him.”
She pinches my arm and releases me so my twin can hug me goodbye. He flexes his jaw, holding back the emotion he so freely shows these days. I thank God that he and Vivien are a perfect match, because with her in the picture, he stands a chance at not being so grouchy all the time without me home to level him out.
“I’m proud of you,” Beck says and smacks my back.
“Thank you,” I say and hold on just a moment longer. “Will you take care of Lorelai for me? Please?”
