Page 33 of Falling for Ezra Thomas
“Yeah, you’re right.” I sigh and roll on my side to grab my stationery and a pen. Unfortunately, Buckler’s constant complaining during the run lost us phone privileges, which we had all been looking forward to. I’ll have to write Lorelai a letter—not exactly the way I want to tell her about this, but I need to get the ball rolling. It’s a lot to consider. With that in mind, I hand Masterson a sheet of paper for him to do the same. It’s going to be a long night of thinking.
Chapter Nineteen
Lorelai
I sigh and stareout the window, unable to get the letter I read this morning out of my mind.
Dear Lorelai,
I have some news. It’s kind of a big deal, so I hope you’re sitting down. If not, maybe do that real quick. I wanted to tell you this over the phone, but we lost privileges thanks to one of the guys acting like an idiot.
Remember a few weeks ago I said our sergeant pulled us aside? Well, today he pulled Masterson, Olson, and me aside again and had a short discussion with us about our careers. He recommended something that shocked me, but I want you to know that this is something for us to talk about together. I’m not going to jump into it without getting your input, because I think we have a future together, Lore. And any decisions I make, need to include you if that’s true.
So, here it goes. He said the three of us show potential, and he thinks we should apply for the Rangers. I never thought thatwould happen, but I guess hard work and determination really do pay off. I know this is a lot different from what we expected, but when I say I want your input, I mean it. Truly. I want honesty if we’re going to make this work. I’m not sure if it’s what I want to do at this point. I need to think about it, ask a few questions, and discuss it with you and my family.
Speaking of which, I hate to strap you with this, but can you please tell my family about this? When we do get a phone call, it won’t be for long and I want to know what they think.
I’m due a phone call in a few days, maybe even before you get this, but just in case, I promise we can talk about this more then. I’m nervous. I’m praying. I don’t know what else to say about it other than it seems like a great opportunity, but not one I anticipated so it feels a lot scarier than it might have been otherwise. It’s no small thing. I’m not sure how my family will take it—honestly, I think my mother still works under the impression I can decide this isn’t the job for me and give a two-week notice—but most of all, I’m afraid of setting things back with you.
I shouldn’t tell you this in a letter, but I’m about to burst. I can’t hold it in any longer. I love you, Lorelai. I don’t know when it happened, maybe even before I left and it’s grown into something more recognizable while separated from you, but no matter how it happened, I love you. I want what is best for you, for us, and whatever future we can have together.
I hope to talk to you soon.
Love always,
Ezra
To say I am stressed does not fully encompass my emotional turmoil, but I keep myself calm by reminding myself that Ezra won’t do anything rash without talking to me. I matter to him.He…loves me. I wish I could hear those words rather than read them, but despite the delivery method, I know they’re true.
And now I have to figure out how to tell Vivien.
She stands in front of a triple-full-length mirror, inspecting her gown for her first fitting. She looks gorgeous, simply stunning, and I know if I break it to her while we’re here, she’ll get snot all over this beautiful gown. Not to mention the fact that our mother and Ezra’s are here with us. But I can’t keep it a secret. He might call any day, and he asked me to help him out.
I clear my throat, earning everyone’s attention.
“Do you see something that needs to be altered?” Vivien asks, turning around again to look at the dress from behind.
“Oh, uh, no. Um…okay, out with it.” I wipe my hands on my pants and meet my sister’s gaze. For some reason, speaking directly to her seems less daunting than telling Ezra’s mother. “So, I got a letter from Ez this morning, and he asked me to—”
“Oh, how sweet,” Mrs. Thomas says. “I bet there are some waiting at home for the rest of us. I can’t wait.” The way she beams makes it even harder to tell her the truth. There probably aren’t any letters, and she’s not going to like what’s in them if there are.
“About that, he asked me to give you all a message.” All eyes glue to me. “He received a recommendation from his drill instructor. I suppose he and two other men exhibit the characteristics they look for in potential Rangers, and they are encouraging him to apply.”
Mrs. Thomas drops her purse and her mouth falls open. I have no doubt she is presently rethinking her parenting methods, wishing she’d let her boys be a little less responsible and a little more hard to handle, then maybe Ezra wouldn’t be perfect at this soldier thing.
“He…what?” she asks.
I raise my hands to calm her. “He said he wouldn’t make any decisions without talking it out with all of us first, so don’t worry about that. He only wanted me to tell you because I guess they lost phone privileges or something. Anyway, he wanted you to be prepared when he does call.”
Vivien sits on the overstuffed chair beside the mirror. “Wow,” she breathes. “Beck is going to take this hard.”
“I’m sorry to dump this on you. I wasn’t sure when the best time would be and…well…I guess this wasn’t really it either.” I bite my lip.
Mom sighs and puts her things down before turning to hug Mrs. Thomas. They carry a quiet conversation that seems to help Ezra’s mother manage her shock, but Vivien continues to stare at me. I realize she might be hurt that Ezra wrote to me and not to her, his best friend.
“Viv, I’m sorry. I know you’re his best—”
She rises from the chair and waves her hands. “Lore, no. Stop. I think it’s time we tell the truth. Ezra and I might have been best friends for most of our lives, but things have changed. I’m marrying Beck, and you have Ezra’s heart. It’s only right and natural that our friendship fades a little. Iwantyou to be his priority, okay?”
