Page 12 of The Trauma Response
She narrows her pretty blue eyes, rests both hands on either hip, and shakes her head. “Listen, Cai, I know you mean well but you don’t get it. I am a little bit older than you, and I’m just a little more experienced when it comes to—”
I cut her off with a knee-slapping laugh. I can’t help it. It’s like a scene ripped right out of high school.
“What’s so funny?” she asks, crossing her arms again.
I lean on her kitchen counter and try to regain my composure. Once I’m sure I can look her in the face without laughing, I slap on a grin and sigh.
“I ask again, what is so funny?” Now her lips purse and her eyes narrow in on me, ready to eviscerate me if I say the wrong thing. This woman is too cute, even now, and I almost can’t stand it. I want to hug her and remind her of how awesome she is but frankly, she smells like a herd of dead cows. For now. In about ten minutes she’s going to cave and do exactly what I ask her to do because Jackson was right. If anyone can annoy Tallulah Whitmore into doing something she doesn’t want to do, it’s me.
And I’ve got alotof things I want her to do, starting with gracing me with her glorious smile again.
Chapter seven
Caius leans on my counter like he knows a secret or the answer to a riddle no one can figure out. He’s got insider knowledge about things that can change the world. He knows where the gold is buried. There is something on his mind, and it’s going to impact me in ways I cannot measure just yet. It unnerves me, because I knowexactlywhat it means. I’m about to watch my whole world of denial crumble around me as he somehow forces me to do everything he says, totally and completely against my iron will.
“You are literally two years older than me. ThatI’m older than youschtick might have worked when we were teens, but it doesn’t now. Nice try though.” He shrugs and stands upright as if he won some battle I never agreed to enter.
“Whatever. The point is that you don’t know what I’ve been going through, so you can’t walk in here and bark orders at me, expecting me to hop to it like a happy little soldier. This is my house, and if I want it dirty, then it can be dirty.”
“I did not bark orders at you, Whits.” His grin grows wider, breaking into that dashing, full, signature Cai smile.
“Fine, but you…you came in heretellingme what to do.”
He arches one eyebrow and gives me a moment to listen to myself. It’s his usual routine, but this time I’m not falling for it. I absolutelycanresist this man’s ability to get me to do things I don’t want to do.
He shrugs slowly and shakes his head once as if it doesn’t matter to him one way or another. It’s lies and trickery. “It’s whatever you want, beautiful, but I’m still here for you. I’ll listen to what you’ve been going through, and if I can help, then I will.” His voice softens and he takes a step closer, genuine concern in his eyes. My heart thaws a few degrees and I find my entire body swaying in his direction, beginning to see things his way.
Darn it. How does hedothat? And I smell myself and realize I needed a shower three days ago. Atthispoint, I need someone to hit me with disinfectant spray.
With a huff, I storm down the hallway to shower.
It isn’t like I don’t want a clean house, but when I can’t do half of what needs to be done in a timely manner, I get too discouraged to push through. Self-doubt and worry have never been friends of mine, but this is different. Usually, those things drive me to work harder, be better, push through until I achieve my goal. But now I don’t even know what the goal is, let alone which direction to point my frustration to achieve it.
“Scrub well,” he teases behind me, but I ignore him and huff again.
The hot water washes over me, reminding me that showers are kind of nice. Embarrassment prickles my cheeks when I think of how awful I must have looked to Caius when I opened the front door. My goodness, if I ever live this down it will be a miracle. For good measure, I wash my hair twice and use the pretty-smelling conditioner. By the time I have reconsidered my entire life and rinsed out the conditioner, the water runs cold.
I know he’s out there, probably trying to find a place to sit amongst the food containers and dirty laundry, and I’m going to have to face him again. But first—dry my hair. Buy some time. Figure out how to wipe his memory clean of ever seeing me seven days into a spiral where personal hygiene went out the window.
I’m met with the sound of a vacuum cleaner when I finally open my bedroom door and head back into the main house. Caius is diligently working in rows until my living room carpet is spotless. And by spotless, I mean there isn’t even a stitch of garbage left on it. The dining room is clean. Even the kitchen looks better despite the dishes piled on one side of the sink. My whole body heaves a great sigh and tension eases in my shoulders and neck.
When he sees me, he stands upright and turns off the vacuum. “There she is. I knew you were somewhere under that mean face you made at me.”
I ignore his tease and look around. My house hasn’t been this clean in ages. “How on earth did you manage to clean almost my entire home in less than an hour, and how do I acquire those superhero skills?”
I probably need to apologize to Jackson, because he was right. With the house clean, I feel infinitely better. This one is going to be a difficult apology to spit out.
“Meh,” he says. “I’m used to cleaning up fast at the firehouse. Besides, it wasn’t that bad. Once I got all the trash collected and piled your laundry in the washer, all that was left was wiping things down and running the vacuum. I do regret to inform you that the number of dirty dishes you accumulated will not all fit in the dishwasher, so the rest are soaking in the sink.”
“Well, I can handle those. Thank you for stopping by and helping me out. I guess I needed it more than I realized.” I try not to let my voice crack, but emotion clogs in my throat. Beingclean is invigorating, and makes me want to tackle something bigger…like my lost career situation. Who would have guessed?
“It’s no problem. I know things are rough, but I really don’t mind helping you out.” He wraps the cord around the machine and rolls it back to the closet. “Oh, and I didn’t get to the bathroom yet because someone was taking the longest shower known to man.”
My cheeks flame. “It’s fine. Really. This was a huge help, and I feel like I can do the rest. Thank you again for getting me up and moving. I hate to admit it, but I do feel a little better.”
He makes no move to leave, so I head into the kitchen to distract myself. I’ve really embarrassed myself, but he’s seen me at my worst before. It was neverthisbad, but here we are. I dip my right hand into the water to make sure I won’t scald my other hand, then dive in. The warmth of the water is completely lost on my left hand, but I try to work through the sensation by rubbing a sponge over a pot. Even the scrubbing side of the sponge feels different than it should, and it hits me all wrong. It builds on my already frustrated mind until I find myself sobbing over the sink. I should be glad I even have grip, but I can’t muster the gladness for even that much.
“Hey, what’s wrong? What happened?” Cai steps into the kitchen and immediately checks the water. “Is it too hot?”
