Page 16 of Forgetting Rafe Thomas
“Uh…yeah, maybe. We’ll see how it shakes out.”
“How’s Luna, by the way? Sorry, I kind of monopolized the conversation there for a minute.”
And there you have it. It’s such a simple question, one that anyone would ask if they knew us as a couple, but it slices my heart wide open all over again. I don’t even know where to begin to answer such a simple question because the answer is complicated beyond belief. Add in the fact that I am literally sitting in a rental cottage a hundred yards from hers, desperate to work out what went wrong, and it’s unbelievable.
“Uh…she…we actually broke up,” I admit. There’s no sense in lying, but it seems they haven’t heard from her either, if he has no idea.
Silence fills the line then a long, slow exhale. “Rafe, I had no idea. I’m so sorry. That really comes as a shock.”
“It’s okay. I’m actually trying to work it out with her, so prayers for that would be appreciated.”
“Yeah, of course. I’ll pray for you. I know Alex will, too. That really sucks.”
“Thanks,” I mumble.
Things are awkward now as a long silence fills the line. Finally, Hayden clears his throat.
“Maybe when you return, we can still grab lunch or something and catch up when I make it down that way. I’ve thought about calling you a few times, but you know how things are. I kept getting busy, then I’d think maybe it’s a bad idea to bother you with your crazy schedule. I guess none of that really matters, but I meant what I said. Maybe we’re not close now, but we’re still friends. I’m here if you need to talk.”
“Yeah, thanks. I really do appreciate it,” I whisper. I’ve gotta get off this call before I find myself spiraling all over again. I can’t unload everything that went wrong in my relationship with Luna to a man who is practically a stranger now. “So, I was just about to run some errands, but give Alex my best, and I’ll let you know when I’m back in town.”
“All right, will do, and thanks. It was good to hear from you,” he says with that stilted tone that says he feels bad he brought it up, but there was no way he could have known.
We exchange pleasantries, the kind that say you’re not sure where you stand with each other, but there’s probably zero chance you’re going to meet up. After I hang up, I curse myself for winging it. I should have had a better plan, maybe even led with the breakup and merged into talking about him and Alex. Then we could have left the conversation on better terms, something more upbeat. There’s nothing to do about it right now.
Just before I put my phone down, I notice I have a message. It’s probably one of my brothers—all of whom cannot believe I up and left Coldstone without telling them, even though they haveallbeen hounding me to up my game to get Luna back. I almost ignore it, but glance at it anyway. It’s from Luna, and my adrenaline takes control. My palms sweat, stomach bottoms,breath catches, and I’m almost positive my heart skips a beat—I know, I’d be dead if that were the case, but there’s no other way to explain the pain in my chest.
It would really suck if I were having a heart attack right now in Ireland while trying to win my ex-girlfriend back. Then again, maybe a massive emergency like that would make her remember how much she loves me and—I shake my head.
“Idiot,” I whisper and refocus on the message.
Before I open it, I say a quick prayer that whatever she says, I can handle like a man…because honestly, right now, I feel like a lost little boy with zero clue about what to do next.
The message is pretty clear. I’m here but don’t bother me. I’m equally as confused as I was before I opened it, so naturally, I pace the floor and repeatedly check out the window to see if she might magically appear on the doorstep. I’m ashamed to admit how much time passes while I wear a hole in the floor until finally, I’m so worked up I’m ready to pop.
Admittedly, this is not a good look on me, so I work to divert my attention by going outside to chop some wood. Maybe by the time I’m done, I’ll have more answers.
Chapter Seven
Luna
The crazy thing aboutprayer is that it’s often answered in ways we least expect. It happens when you’re not looking or seeking something that’s not yours to find. For me, it seems like God is pretty determined to smack me with the truth, which makes a lot of sense because I’m pretty hard to convince, and I have a tendency to not pay attention to subtlety. I also tend to say I’ll follow Him, then make side quests that lead to heartache and misery He never intended for me.
I don’t want to do that anymore, so when I’m finished making a snack, I decide to open the mysterious email I received from an old friend while taking my much-needed nap. Who knows, maybe God had a hand in the timing, and I should pay attention even though I’m onvacation.A quick tap on the heading and I discover it’s a wedding announcement, which initially makes me want to vomit, but after a little introspection, I decide I should suck it up and be a good friend. I’ll read every word, RSVP likea normal person would, and be happy for someone else who not only found love, but locked it in.
But first…I need more firewood.
I bundle up again and head out to the porch where it’s stacked nearly halfway up the side of the house. I don’t see a bucket or wheelbarrow to get it to the porch, but I figure I can carry a few logs at a time. What else have I got to do? I mean, Icouldwalk over to see Rafe and just get the awkward hello out of the way, but it makes so much more sense to fly all the way to Ireland and ignore him the whole time.
After I’m weighed down with a few logs, I head back to the porch. The pile is taller than I intended, so it sways this way and that. It’s probably way too heavy for me to safely carry to the porch, but again, I’m stubborn.
“Shoot,” I huff and try to accommodate the sway. I lean into it and try to readjust, shifting the weight back to the center so it doesn’t topple and break all my toes. Or worse, something on the property that I can’t see since I’ve blocked my own vision. Instead of pulling off such a feat, I trip over another log and nearly lose the whole thing. By some miracle, I manage to get my feet in the proper places and right myself. Somehow, I make it to the stairs. Now to get up them without breaking my neck.
Obviously, the right thing to do is to drop the load onto the porch and take a couple inside at a time, thereby ensuring that I don’t hurt myself or the property. But nope, not on my plan. Instead, I suffer through it and make my way, all but crawling, up the stairs. Now I have to find the door handle, so I raise my leg and semi-settle the load between one arm and my knee while flailing about with the other arm in search of a door handle.
“Here, let me get the door for you,” a man says, and my load is instantly lifted. Surprise at the kindness of the offer overtakes what should probably be some initial fear that an ax murderer isabout to enter the cottage with me. I brush my wild hair from my face and adjust my clothing.
“Oh, thank you. I seem to have overestimated my ability to haul firewood,” I say with a chuckle that sounds like those nerves are finally setting in. What will I do if this guy tries to kill me? If I scream loudly enough, would Rafe hear me?
