Page 28 of Down the Aisle
Just as I opened my mouth to converse with Asher some more, the audible click of the lock and front door opening caused both of us to shut up and snap our heads in that direction. Both of us were practically vibrating in excitement, goofy smiles spread across our faces, as we waited for the door to open fully and reveal a tired but smiling Eliza to us.
Being the more important one between us, Asher instantly captured his mother's attention. "Mama!" The highchair screeched and scooted around as the chubby toddler bounced in his seat. "Mama!" A high-pitched ringing filled my ears from his ecstatic shrieks, along with the chair's plastic legs fighting against the wooden floor.
At least Eliza's delighted laugh made the assault on my eardrums worth it. "I see he hasn't conned you into buying him half of a toy store," she joked after shutting the door and locking it.
Closing the distance to Asher with a few long strides, she plucked him from his seat, and hugged him tightly with an infectious smile. She buried her face into his giggling body and inhaled deeply. "Oh, I missed you so much chunkers." Her muffled happiness pulverized my dark heart.
I don't know what it was but seeing Eliza smile or be genuinely overjoyed made me forget that I was a bad person. She made me feel a sense of normalcy and belonging, and she brought out this thrill in me. I just wanted to be content.
I was convinced that such a TV-perfect scene would eventually become the norm for us. Eliza coming home from work, or hell, me coming out of the office after a long day, to nothing but pure bliss. It really wasn't a matter of if, as I had every intention of making this our routine. I'd condition Eliza to love it to where she wouldn't be able to live without it.
There won't be a life without me in it. I'll make sure of it.
Forcing myself to smile normally, I got up and hugged her briefly in greeting. "Oh, he came close," I joked back with a chuckle. "Why don't you go wash up real quick for dinner," I suggested, turning her body slightly toward the bathroom. "It's almost ready. I just need a few extra minutes for the pasta to be done."
Pressing her lips together into a tight line, her eyes bounced between the bathroom and the lot of us for a long second. It seemed like she'd take a seat and be stubborn, so it astounded me when she reluctantly placed Asher back in his chair. The soft nod of her head nearly went unnoticed by me, along with her hum, "Alright, but it shouldn't take me long either." She didn't sound fully convinced, but I had to praise her silently for trying.
Her slender body looked like a blur, darting to the closet and then into the bathroom. I wanted to question her about whether she actually washed up or not when she reemerged from the bathroom, not even a second after the door had shut. Seriously, I blinked twice, and it felt like she was in and out. I would've honestly questioned her if it weren't for the wet bangs and fresh face.
Smiling like an idiot in love, I snaked an arm around her waist when she came close enough. "Hopefully, work wasn't toobad today?" I asked while leading her to the spot I'd been sitting at when she came home.
Her head lulled back to look up at me when I pushed her down into the seat. The soft wrinkles at the corners of her tired eyes deepened with her exhausted smile. "It wasn't too bad," she answered me truthfully.
Then, her face straightened out with a look of realization. "Oh! Mary gave us some cookies!" There was some pressure against my palms when I forced her to remain seated. "Adam, I'm going to forget them in my car again if—"
I cut her off by holding my hand up, though I instantly regretted it when I saw her flinch a little. Remorse locked my knees and buckled them, sending me to the ground before her. "Shit, I'm so sorry, little rose. I should've been more mindful." I really should have, and I couldn't help but scold myself mentally for scaring her like that.
Breathing deeply, I looked up at her with a face full apology. "I swear to you, on my life, on my parents' lives, on everything, that I will never raise my hand at you with any intention of harming you." Gingerly, I placed my hands on her outer thighs, squeezing and rubbing with my thumbs. "Listen, I don't know exactly what happened to you, and I hope that one day you'll trust me enough to let me know, but I will never mistreat you."
Slowly, I bowed my head and kissed the top of her knees tenderly. "You really don't have to tell me anything. Your reaction is telling me enough." Peering up at her with an understanding smile, I leaned my cheek against her thigh. "I won't push for anything either because I trust that you will tell me when you are ready."
God, please don't let me fuck this up already.
Maybe dropping down to my knees might was a little much, but how else was I supposed to show her I was sorry and meantno harm? Words wouldn't have sufficed, and I doubted they'd affect her since the last bastard probably ran them ragged.
Looking up at her, I smiled contently "You know, once I plump you up a little, these thighs are going to be heavenly."
God damn it! Why the fuck did I say that!? That sounds so weird in a moment like this.
I wanted to smack myself for losing my cool with Eliza. I mean, I was a grown-ass man with experience; I shouldn't be fumbling around like some awkward teenager. It wasn't as if I didn't know what to do, because I did. It was more or less not knowing how to go about things with Eliza. I had to be careful with her until I figured out what her deal was.
Once I figured out her tune, I could dance to it to my delight and string her along until she matched my rhythm. Until then, I had to be a goofy klutz around her, not that I minded. Being a charming asshole would've been preferred, but a nice challenge was always refreshing.
Eliza's long sigh made me frown internally, especially when she slowly raised a jerky hand up and held it inches from my head. Was she going to push me off? Tell me to leave? Shut me out?
My hands unconsciously gripped at her tighter out of fear of having her slip further from me. She could shove me away all she wanted, but like hell would I let her go further than an inch.
She is mine.
My darkened gaze went unnoticed until Eliza's nervous voice pointed my face out to me. "A-Adam, why are you looking at me like that? I… I'm sorry if—"
Confused, I picked my head up a little and tilted it while softening my tense face. "Look like what? Am I looking at you funny? Did I offend you? What are you apologizing for?" Great, what had my face fucked up?
Breathing out a short and nervous chuckle, she settled her hand down on her lap. Then, her lips twisted for a few seconds before her words came out rather awkwardly. "I… You… Uhhh… It's just… I don't know how to say this without offending you…" Her upper body leaned away from me despite the back of the chair stopping her. "I don't want you to get mad at me," she admitted in a trembling voice, her eyes averting from me and darting around the room.
Okay, how the hell do I go about this?
Relaxing my shoulders, I brightened my face with a playful smile. "Do I have flour on my face? Sauce? Dressing? Do I look like a clown?" I hoped joking around with her would ease some of the tension before bringing in the heavy subjects. "Mia rosa, there's little you can say to offend me, so please, don't ever be afraid to speak your mind with me." Yeah, but how the hell was I going to get that through her thick skull? "And I know you might not believe me much, but I swear, I won't ever get upset at you for anything like that, and if I ever do, then break my face with a pan," I offered with a nervous but serious smile. "And since I quite like my face, I'll be sure to keep to my own promises," I quipped with a sheepish chuckle.
