Page 46 of Shelf-Made Man
Wait a minute. He was a twenty-first-century guy, not a fairytale monster. He didn’t need claws.
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a black nylon case.
“What’s that?” asked Alfie.
“A Leatherman multi-tool set.” Tobias removed it from the case to demonstrate. “See? It has pliers, wire strippers, a screwdriver, a knife… nineteen tools in all. Aunt Virginia sent it to me two Christmases ago. She said she thought it might come in handy for me at work. I don’t really deal with hardware stuff, but you never know. I use the bottle opener pretty often, actually. And I got in the habit of carrying it around.”
Olve was beaming. “That sounds exactly like the type of thoughtful gift Virginia would bestow.”
“But how come I still have it? And my cell phone? And….” He dug in his pockets. “And my wallet, my keys, and my ChapStick. Shouldn’t the goons have taken this stuff away before locking me up?”
Alfie looked uncomfortable. “It’s because you’re a troll, my love.”
“Huh?”
“They misjudged you—as I did myself. When people see trolls, they assume they’re capable of little more than mindless brutality. Even other trolls might assume this, because that’s the message they’ve heard for their entire lives.”
Tobias pondered this for a moment. “So if I can’t pound anyone into a pulp, they don’t see me as a threat.”
“If you’d possessed a larger blade, I’m sure they would have taken that. But they likely didn’t recognize your… Leatherman, was it? I’m sorry their appraisal of you was so negative.”
Tobias, who wasn’t sorry at all, grinned. “People have been misjudging me for my entire life. For once, maybe that’s worked in my favor.” He opened the diamond-coated file and began to scrape at the wall.
Alfie came closer but was careful to not get in the way, and then Olve got off the bench and, on slightly tottery legs, came over to watch as well. At first nothing happened, but as Tobias pressed harder, the white coating started to wear away. It was a very thick, sort of rubbery paint, and when Tobias was able to get his fingernails under the edge of it, he peeled away a strip about the size of his arm.
There was another layer underneath it, a sickly green.
“May I see?” asked Olve.
When Tobias stepped aside, Olve reached out and touched the green spot—and drew his hand back with a hiss. “It stings.”
Both Tobias and Alfie felt a very vague tingle on contact, but nothing painful. “It’s repelling magic,” said Olve, seemingly fascinated. “Magic is a more integral part of a wizard—even a poor one like me—than of a troll or elf. Tobias, I do believe you’ve discovered how they do it.”
Alfie clapped Tobias on the back. “Well done!”
Tobias would have liked to bask in the praise, buthe felt discouraged. “I think all four walls, plus the floor and ceiling, are coated in this. It’d take me forever to get it all off. We don’t have forever.”
He scraped at the green stuff and it came off, but in tiny flakes. It was like when he’d bought his house and had intended to strip the paint off the original woodwork. He’d given up after half a day and just repainted everything. Which had been fine back then, but now his life, his husband’s life, and the life of his godmother’s husband hung in the balance.
“Perhaps if even some of it is removed, our magics will work,” Olve suggested. He looked more hopeful than Tobias had seen him, and that was something—as long as Tobias didn’t crush that hope.
“Let me work at it for a bit,” said Alfie, gently prying the Leatherman from Tobias’s fingers. “I don’t think you’re fully recovered from your head injury.”
“I can?—”
“Tobias. Let me.”
In truth, Tobias’s head still ached, so he nodded and returned to what was now his usual sitting spot against the wall. Olve resumed his place on the bench, huddled under his tattered blanket, and watched. Alfie, whistling something that sounded suspiciously like “Santa Baby,” started scraping away.
He had been at it for only a few moments when there was a noise at the door.
“It’s them!” Olve hissed urgently.
Alfie reacted with inhuman speed—although maybe it was normal elf speed. He tossed theLeatherman to Tobias, who caught it and tucked it in a pocket as Alfie leaned back against the wall, hiding the peeled spot with his body.
The door heaved open and a particularly burly troll immediately blocked the opening. Tobias could just barely see two more trolls standing in the hall immediately behind him. “Traitors,” growled the first one. He flung a bulky sack onto the floor, backed out, and slammed the door shut.
After a pause to make sure he wouldn’t return, Tobias sagged with relief.
