Page 26 of Honey Sugar
“You know I have to go to work in the morning. Maybe I’ll come back on my day off.” I hated to let her go but I nodded my head in agreement. Ivy poked her plump bottom lip out and hugged Mama. “It was so good seeing you, Ivy. You’ve grown up to be a beautiful young lady. Please take care of your mother.” They pulled away from the embrace and then Mama looked at me. “Behave yourself, Titan. Protect my little sister.”
“You know I got you.” I bent down and hugged her extra tight because my gut told me to and I always listened to my gut. I pressed a kiss to her temple and stared at her for an extra beat. “I love you,” I told her.
“I love you too son. I’ll see y’all later. Let me get on the road.” I walked her to her new car and gave her one last hug before she got in and drove off.
Back inside the house, Aunt Liv, Ivy, and I were all quiet. Mama was the glue that pulled everyone together and made us all happy just with her presence. Aunt Liv finally spoke up and said, “I never thought I’d be so happy to see my sister. Makes me realize how much time we let slip away without talking.”
“Yeah, time has a way of getting away from you without you even noticing,” Ivy said while she glanced at me. “People change…”
“They definitely do,” I agreed.
“I don’t feel so alone in the world knowing that I can still talk to Sarah.” Aunt Liv had a peaceful smile on her face that made me happy to see. She deserved happiness even if it was only for a moment. “Well, let me get dinner started before Beau comes home fussing.” Fear stole her joy like a thief as she made her way into the kitchen. Ivy headed upstairs slower than a sloth and I made sure to go up behind her so she wouldn’t fall on her ass.
“I’m going to take a shower and fall face first into bed.”
“You’re not going to pop any Xanax?” I asked once we got to the top step.
“No, Titan I’m not,” she said with attitude.
Once we were in her room, she pulled her shirt off and my eyebrows flew up to my hairline. An all-white lace bra covered her smooth honey breasts from my probing eyes. “Um…I can go to my room until you’re done.”
“Oh, shit. I forgot you were right there. It’s not like you’ve never seen a girl in a bra before. I’m sure you’ve seen dozens of girls naked and half-naked…right?”
“Yeah. I’ve seen plenty. Not you though.” I didn’t know if that came out the wrong way or not but I shut my damn mouth after I said it. Ivy’s expression was blank and hard to read through the red haze in her eyes.
I sat on the bed with a sigh while she went into the bathroom to take a shower. I let my mind float while the water ran. It took me back to the night I killed Bear’s soldier.
I heard the bullet fire from the barrel of my gun like I was right back in the alley again. The cool night air blew across my face and the loud shot made my ears ring.
I killed because I had to.
Even though it put my mind in a fucked up place, I had to realize I didn’t go out expecting to shoot anyone in the head. I wasn’t a bad guy. I wasn’t a villain. I was forced into that role. It wasn’t what I chose.
That’s probably why my thoughts were winding down a twisted path whenever I looked at my cousin. She was gorgeous but my mind was a new landscape that I wasn’t used to. It went from being a normal sunny day at the bayou in my head to being a murky night ripe with cypress tree pollen and thick moss swaying on the branches. My mind was wrought with shadows and distorted images.
I had to keep telling myself I wasn’t looking at Ivy like I’d look at a woman I wanted.
I wasn’t the villain.
I wasn’t sick.
When the shower cut off, my mind snapped back to the present moment and I looked up in time to see Ivy emerging from the bathroom in a cloud of steam with a pink towel wrapped around her dewy body. Drops of water clung to her golden skin. Some drops skated down her arms and hung on the tips of her fingers like she commanded them at her will. She glanced at me for a brief moment before turning toward the dresser putting her back to me.
The weed in my system made my thoughts move slower but they still pooled at the deep dip in Ivy’s back that led to her round ass. I forced my concentration elsewhere. Anywhere else.
I was not sick.
I was not the villain.
It was easier to focus when I had something to do. I sent my mother a text and told her to call me when she got home. She sent me a text back shortly after and told me she would.
When I dared to look around Ivy’s pink room, I saw she finally had clothes on. I didn’t even know when that happened. She wore a pair of sleep shorts and a t-shirt knotted above her navel. Since her skin was still damp, the cotton left little to the imagination.
“Titan, what the hell kind of weed is this?” She fell backward on her bed with her hand plastered to her forehead. A laugh slipped out when I looked at her.
“Come on now. You pop Xans like a pro but you can’t handle one bite of an edible?” I nudged her and she whined with a smile that pulling her full lips upward.
“This is new to me so shut the fuck up.”
