Page 64 of When a Highlander Vows
“As well he should. Now, what were ye thinkin’ about as ye sat on yer brother’s stone? Dae ye miss him, Lass?”
As Caitlin turned to face the older woman, she smiled fondly. She thought she was beginning to understand the true nature of grief, how it would hold her in its grasp for the rest of her days. But it did not mean she would always be unhappy. It did not mean she would pine for Seamus, so much so that each day would bring with it a new burden to bear.
“Aye. As I’m sure ye can understand, I will always miss him. I wanted to be with him today. To smell the sea, and to look out upon the thing that took him from me. To hear his voice, speak to him.”
Lottie patted her hand gently. “Ye understand it far better than me, for I’m afraid there is nay one now dead whom I miss, besides a couple of friends here and there. Nay, it is only Lucas now whose death would tear me in twain.”
Caitlin felt sorry for her new companion and the secrets she shared unknowingly about her family’s past.
“I am sorry to hear that, Lottie. But I ken that there is much love between ye and Lucas.”
“Aye, so there is. Much love.” Lottie’s eyes began to look hazy. “Even if I often think him to be a damned fool. But Caitlin, ye mustnae be angry with me or upset, but there is another reason why I came out to meet ye.”
“Och? What is it?”
Sighing, Lottie shook her head. “The blasted lad has took himself off again, and this time, he left a note.”
She rummaged in her pocket and pulled out a small scrap of paper. Caitlin took it and put it close to her face so that she could read it properly.
Scrawled in a hurried hand, it read,I will return soon. Tell Caitlin I have said goodbye and willnae be gone longer than I need to be.
Caitlin read it again and again. And then, frowning, she handed the small piece of paper back to Lottie.
“I see. Well, why should I be upset with ye?” she asked, even though disappointment had created a yawning chasm in her belly.
Lucas, gone again? Again because of her? Why did he continue to run away?
Folding the scrap back into her pocket, Lottie gave her a cheeky grin. “Come now, Lass. There is nay need to hide things from me. I see it all well enough even though I am old.”
Caitlin blushed and looked down, wishing they were back in the castle, and they could busy themselves with a distracting task.
“What dae ye mean?”
“I mean that I ken exactly what is goin’ on between the two of ye, and I thought ye would be upset that Lucas is leavin’, again, seein’ how the two of ye have been carryin’ on lately.”
Caitlin blushed a fierce red, and Lottie only laughed when she looked at her surprised face.
Lucas had only just arrived home from the borders. But soon after his conversation with Archie, he left, jumping on his horse, and racing off into the late afternoon. Before he’d gone, he’d written a note to his Nan, Hoping that she wouldn’t be terribly angry, or that Caitlin would feel she’d been abandoned yet again.
Archie had tried to dissuade him, as had his manservant, but Lucas was determined. He would find a way for Caitlin to forgive him. And to prove to himself that he was not all bad. That there was still hope to remove whatever blackness his soul had been tainted with.
“What am I to say to her?” Archie had asked, exasperated, when he saw Lucas on his way out the gates again, a bundle under his arm. “Promise me that ye willnae be gone for ages, that ye will return within days.”
“I cannae make nay such promise, but I dae promise ye this: that I daenae run for fear or to keep meself from Caitlin. I hope to be back soon. It’s the only way, Archie.”
His usually merry friend stared at him in the eyes for a few seconds, as if testing his resolve. But he must have found something he approved of. For after a little while, Archie eventually stepped back and nodded.
“Fine then. Go. Dae what ye must.”
“I have left a note for Nan. She will show it to Caitlin.” He clapped Archie on the shoulder and gave him a half smile. “Ye have done well, Lad. I have listened to yer words, daenae think I have nae.”
Archie looked pleased but at the same time, concerned. “But what of safety? Those mysterious men? And the MacGregor border? There are many who may cause ye trouble along the way.”
“Aye, but I have met many a trouble in me time. I daenae fear for me safety, and I have a noble mission to complete.” He turned away then and he left out the gates calling for aid for someone to get his horse from the stables.
Searbas did not seem pleased when they started riding. And especially not when the sun slipped behind the hills on the horizon. There was a slight chill in the air, and Lucas felt it might have been an ominous beginning, but as he’d told Archie, it was a noble mission he was about to complete.
When darkness fell in full. He stopped at the first lit village he passed and stopping quietly, he tied Searbas’ reins to a wooden post outside the tavern and walked inside, still cloaked.
