Page 70 of Feral Gods
"Stop! Both of you!" Kaia's voice finally penetrates my rage as she rushes toward us, Zephyr right behind her.
I see the danger too late. The ancient ceiling, weakened by our battle, begins to collapse. Massive stone blocks plummet toward the chamber floor—directly over where Kaia stands.
Time slows. Horror replaces rage in an instant. I lunge forward, wings extending to their fullest reach, desperate to shield her from the falling debris. Thane and Zephyr move simultaneously with the same intent.
In the confusion of motion, my outstretched talon catches Kaia's shoulder, the force of my desperate lunge sending her sprawling across the floor. Her head strikes the stone with a sickening sound that stops my heart. She lies motionless as rubble crashes around her still form.
"KAIA!" The name tears from my throat, anguish replacing fury.
Zephyr reaches her first, his magical shield expanding to cover her from the continuing debris. Thane braces himself beneath a massive stone block, preventing it from crushing all three of them. And I stand frozen in horror, staring at the thintrickle of blood matting Kaia's dark curls where her head struck the floor.
Blood drawn not by our enemies, but by my own hand.
The realization breaks through every barrier of rage and pride. I stumble forward, falling to my knees beside her still form as Zephyr examines her with gentle hands.
"Is she—" I can't finish the question, terror closing my throat.
"Unconscious, not dead," Zephyr answers, his tone clinically precise despite the chaos around us. "The injury appears superficial, but head wounds are unpredictable."
Relief weakens me further, though guilt immediately rushes in to fill the void. My gaze fixes on the thin scratch along her shoulder where my talon caught her—minimal damage itself, but the cause of her striking her head.
"I did this," I whisper, the admission raw and painful.
Thane, having secured the fallen stone, moves to my side. His hand lands on my shoulder—no longer a threat but steadying support.
"Not intentionally," he says, echoing his earlier words with grim irony.
"Intent matters little compared to outcome." I reach toward Kaia's face, then pull back, suddenly afraid to touch her. "I swore to protect her."
"And you will," Zephyr says, surprisingly gentle as he continues his examination. "But first, help us move her to safety. This chamber remains unstable."
The simple directive—practical, immediate—gives me something to focus on beyond the howling guilt. With infinite care, I gather Kaia's limp form in my arms, cradling her against my chest as I follow Zephyr toward the healing chamber.
She feels impossibly fragile, heartbreakingly human in my monstrous arms. The rage that seemed so overwhelming moments ago has vanished completely, replaced by cold,clarifying horror at what I've become—what I've always been beneath the veneer of civilization.
I lay her gently on the healing altar, stepping back immediately to give Zephyr room to work. My gaze fixes on the small smear of her blood staining my talon. Evidence of my failure. My fundamental unworthiness.
"I'll need clean water and the healing supplies," Zephyr instructs, not looking up from Kaia's still form.
Thane nods, moving toward the storage area. I remain frozen, unable to look away from Kaia's pale face.
"Ravik." Zephyr's voice penetrates my self-loathing. "This doesn't help her."
"What would you have me do?" I ask, voice hollow with despair.
"Secure the sanctuary. Check for structural damage from our... disagreement. Prepare the alternative location we discussed should we need to evacuate." His turquoise eyes meet mine briefly. "Be the commander she needs right now, not the lover she doesn't."
The harsh truth of his words penetrates where gentler approaches might have failed. With a curt nod, I back away from the altar, from Kaia, from the evidence of my disastrous loss of control.
"I'll ensure our security," I manage, already turning toward the door.
"Ravik." Thane's voice stops me at the threshold. "This isn't finished between us."
"No," I agree without turning back. "But it is finished between Kaia and me."
I don't wait for his response, striding out into the corridor with purpose that masks the hollowness spreading through my chest. The rage has burned itself out completely, leaving only cold certainty in its wake.
I am what I've always been—a creature of violence and possession, incapable of the love Kaia deserves. My touch brings only harm. My protection ends in injury. My love manifests as control.
