Page 64 of Healing the Highland Sinner
The longer he remained silent, the more tense she seemed to be getting. He could only imagine the nightmare scenarios playing out in her head and knew he had to speak before they got worse… or before he lost his nerve.
“Rosalind, it kills me tae tell ye this, but I’ve been deceivin’ ye this whole time.”
She recoiled like he’d just slapped her, a stricken expression on her face. “Wh—what dae ye mean, Ellair? What the hell are ye talkin’ about?”
He sighed. “I’m nae just a hired sword who happened tae find ye. I was sent.”
Rosalind gaped at him with wide eyes, her mouth hanging open as a look of disbelief crossed her face. She seemed to take a moment, trying to understand what he’d said as if he’d spoken in some foreign tongue. Eventually, she closed her mouth and shook her head.
“I—I dinnae understand,” she said.
A chasm opened in the pit of his stomach and part of his mind screamed at him to abandon this course, to double back and go back to how things between him and Rosalind had been. To stay quiet about his reason for being there and ride it out, enjoy every last moment with her he could, until it all came crashing down.
Ellair shut that voice in his head down ruthlessly. It had already gone too far. The feelings they both carried for each other were real and he was going to hurt her. He hoped that by confessing his sins to her, he would somehow mitigate that pain and hopefully, find a path to forgiveness. His hopes were not high, but a sliver of hope was better than none.
“Me name is Ellair, that much is true,” he told her. “But I’m nae a hired sword. I’m the War Chief for Clan MacAulay. And on the instruction of me laird, I’ve been workin’ with Laird Torrin Gunn tae uncover the smugglers aidin’ and abettin’ Laird Sinclair?—”
“What are ye bleedin’ talkin’ about?”
“I’m tryin’ tae tell ye,” he said. “I’ve been workin’ at the behest of Laird Gunn. He wanted me tae find and stop the arms bein’ sent tae his rivals by Sinclair and the English.”
Her eyes shimmering with tears, Rosalind sank to her knees in the soft sand of the cave. She stared at Ellair, the look of betrayal on her face slicing through his heart like a scythe. A single tear spilled from the corner of her eye and streamed down her face.She shook her head and turned away from him, as if trying to deny the truth of it, even to herself.
“Were ye sent tae kill me?” she asked without turning to him.
He shook his head. “Nay. I wasnae sent tae kill ye.”
“Then what was yer purpose?”
“Laird Gunn wanted me tae find out who ye were. He wants?—”
“He wants tae kill me.”
“He didnae fully understand the situation.”
“So, he did mean tae kill me.”
Ellair shook his head. “I’ve explained the situation tae him. I told him about Blaine?—”
Rosalind’s eyes widened and her lips curled back in a feral sneer. “Ye had nay right tae tell him about me braither?—”
“I told him about yer braither tae explain that Sinclair was extortin’ ye. That he was forcin’ ye tae smuggle his goods intae the Highlands fer him.”
She sniffed back a fresh batch of tears and began to rise. Ellair held out a hand to help Rosalind to her feet, but she slappedit away, her face etched with anger. Pain rippling through his heart, Ellair withdrew his hand and took a step back, doing his best to control the emotions roiling in his belly. He wanted to make her understand.
“I ken I deceived ye, Rosalind. And I hate that I did?—”
“And yet, ye did it anyway,” she cut him off, her tone as acidic as her gaze.
“I didnae expect tae feel fer ye the way I dae,” he said. “I was daein’ me duty. Daein’ what me laird instruct me tae dae?—”
“Just daein’ yer duty,” she huffed.
“Aye. Tis true. But… things changed,” he said. “Ye changed me. Ye made me see that what ye were daein’ was nae what Laird Gunn thought it was. That ye had nay choice.”
She turned her back on him and took a few steps away, her arms folded over her chest, her posture stiff and rigid. The anger radiating from her was like heat from a fire. She stood like that for several long moments, not speaking to him, simply staring out at the ocean beyond. The silence stretched on so long, Ellair was about to say something just to break the awkward tension in the air when she finally turned around. And when she did, he felt his heart drop into the pit of his belly.
Her arms still folded over her chest, Rosalind’s eyes were narrowed and her jaw set, her lips a tight slash across her face.She glared at him coldly, her expression saying she wished she could cleave his head from his shoulders.
