Page 35 of Ruining a Highland Healer
"I think… I think I’m truly interested in her," Torrin said. It was still early, of course, but then again it wasn’t unheard of for nobles to marry like this, without truly knowing each other. He had started falling for her in that fanciful, half-real way that one could fall for someone they only knew for a very short time, andthough the feelings were not yet deep, his interest was real. He could envision a life with her. He could imagine being with her, growing a family, building the clan. Never before had he felt like this for a woman, and the reality of his feelings, as well as how fast they had developed, scared him. But he supposed there was nothing to be scared of. In a few days, he would have Valora’s answer, and he would know for certain whether this dream he had of them growing old together would come true or if it would remain nothing but a dream.
"Well, I’m glad," said Noah with a small, yet genuine smile. "Ye deserve tae be happy, Torrin. An’ if Miss MacNeacail makes ye happy, then ye should try tae court her properly an’ show her why ye would be a good match fer her."
"I am courtin’ her," Torrin pointed out, though it wasn’t entirely true. He wasn’t courting her as much as he was treating her like she was already his wife, which had seemed like a good plan at first but now, in retrospect, seemed silly. Perhaps he should have approached this differently, he thought, now that Noah had pointed this out to him.
But it was never too late.
"I dinnae ken if what ye’re daein’ is courtin’—"
Noah was interrupted by a knock on the door, which was swiftly followed by the door opening without Torrin calling in the visitor—which could only mean one thing. Something bad had happened, something that needed his immediate attention.
A young guard appeared at the door, his face pallid and his forehead covered in sweat. He approached the desk, his chest heaving, and took a few deep breaths before he spoke.
"Me laird, the scouts we sent after the Keith men… they were found slain."
The news hit Torrin like an arrow to the heart, pain spreading over his chest at the thought that he had sent his men to their deaths. They all knew the risks, of course; they were all willing to die for their clan, but that didn’t make it any easier when one of his men lost his life.
Rage coursed through him. How could it be that his men had been killed like this? Even if they had been discovered, would Laird Keith’s council kill his scouts for no good reason? They would have known they were only observing, making sure they would leave his lands.
Unless there is somethin’ they are tryin’ tae conceal. Unless they did this tae hide their tracks.
And yet, he still couldn’t tell what such a thing might be. No matter how much he thought about it, no matter in how many ways he spun it in his mind, no answer came to him.
"Was it Laird Keith’s men?" he asked. "Dae we ken?"
The guard shook his head. "We dinnae ken, me laird. Nae one was there tae witness it. We are tryin’ tae find out who may have done it but…"
There was nothing to help them figure out who had done this and why.
Once again, they were in the dark.
"Damn it!" Torrin cursed, slamming his hand on the desk His inkwell rattled precariously, threatening to spill ink over his documents, and so did the pitcher of water there. Drawing in a deep breath to calm himself, Torrin looked at Noah, giving him a small nod. "Make sure their families have everythin’ they need. An’ let them ken their men will be buried with the highest o’ honors."
"As ye wish," said Noah, pushing his chair back to stand and get everything arranged. Once he and the guard were both gone, Torrin was left alone with his thoughts, his confusion and his grief. All that grief, all that pain and death for no good reason, all of it chasing him throughout the years.
With a sigh, he pushed himself off his chair, deciding it was time to head to bed for the day. Perhaps the following morning, he would have a clearer mind for this, and he would be able to guess, at least, at Laird Keith’s motives.
Torrin made his way to his chambers, opening the door quietly to find Valora already sleeping in his bed. She was peaceful and vulnerable too, and it struck him just how much he wanted toprotect her, how much he wanted to keep her by her side. And unless she decided she didn’t want to be with him, then he would do anything in his power to keep her and to love her like she deserved.
Slowly, quietly so as to not wake her, Torrin stood over the side of the bed and pushed a stray strand of her hair off her face with delicate fingers. He didn’t want to disturb her; he only wanted to feel close to her, to see what it would be like if she was truly his.
There was one thing for certain in his mind. If she agreed to this, if she became his wife, then he would never let her go.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Her sister, married to a monster whose only desire was to use her for his gain and benefit. Her kind, innocent sister, in the hands of the man who would never love her and who would simply demand things from her until she had nothing left to give. Her sister, who would endure it all if she knew she had to, just as Valora had endured her fair share of things.
That was the nightmare that woke her, drenched in cold sweat and shivering even under the covers. She opened her eyes with a start, her gaze panicked as she looked around the still unfamiliar room, wondering where she was.
But her hand was clasped securely in Torrin’s, who was laying on the floor next to her. He didn’t have any blankets. He didn’t have any of his pillows or his furs, but was simply laying on the cold stone floor, holding her hand.
His breathing was steady and it seemed to her as though he was asleep. If he was awake, he gave no indication of it even as Valorastirred. How long had he been there, she wondered? Did he know she was having a nightmare and had come to soothe her, only to fall asleep next to her like this?
Her stomach gave a funny flip at the thought and a strange warmth spread over her chest, warming her from the inside. All her life, the only person who truly cared about her was Althea, and before she was gone, their mother. All her life, Valora had been searching for someone who would care about her like this, who would hold her hand when she had a nightmare, when she couldn’t sleep.
Was Torrin that man? Could it be that despite their circumstances, despite her stubbornness, he had always been the one she was looking for?
It was late at night, well past midnight, and Valora didn’t trust herself with these thoughts. It was easy to be a romantic in the darkness of the night, when there was no one else around, but it wasn’t as easy in the light of the day. Come morning, she would have to confront everything else—her fears for the future, her fears that a marriage could never be a good thing for a woman, her fears that she would never find love because such love did not exist in anyone but her mother and her sister. She needed to consider her response to Torrin with logic as much as with emotion. She couldn’t give in to this desire to be loved and not look at the facts—the main of which was that she didn’t know him at all and what she perceived as care could be nothing more than a mirage, an illusion to lull her into a false sense of security.
