Page 76 of Malice
“Doesn’t seem like we have much of a choice,” Chaos said. “At least now we know what to expect. And the wards still give us a heads-up, so it’s something. Even if it’s not much.”
That was for me, and I didn’t dignify it with a response.
Instead I turned to Merri. “We can’t forget the task at hand, even with the enemies we just faced. That’s what they want. We’ve stopped them once again, at least for the time being. Nowthat the immediate threat has been dealt with, we continue on with our quest to end this apocalypse before Lucifer can claim his throne.”
“So... fucking?” Sin asked with an amused grin.
“Fucking,” I agreed. My eyes never left Merri’s, which is why I caught the flare of arousal the instant it sparked.
“Come on then,” she said, taking my hand. “It’s your turn.”
Fallingasleep on purpose was a unique experience. There was no slow, steady descent where you can’t quite connect the dots between sleep and consciousness. It was more akin to plunging into a cold pool. Immediate, overwhelming, and more than a little disorientating.
I didn’t mind it, though, not when Merri was joining me and I was going to get my chance to show her exactly what being mine meant. This dreamwalk gave me so much Merri couldn’t comprehend. The freedom to let go of everything else swirling in my head and focus on her, on us. I also needed to erase the lingering pain of the nightmare that demon had trapped me in, and I couldn’t think of a better way than losing myself in Merri.
Or maybe what I was truly trying to do was find myself. Seeing my son—fictional as he’d been—had unmoored me, and I was in desperate need of a safe haven.
“What has you frowning like that, Mal?” Merri’s voice pulled me from the threat of despair.
“My thoughts are getting the better of me.”
“The demon?” she guessed, expression free from judgment.
I nodded, a muscle twitching in my clenched jaw.
“Come here,” she murmured, cupping my cheek with her hand and feathering her lips over mine.
I closed my eyes and just let myself feel her, the tension melting away as quickly as the two of us melted into the kiss. Why couldn’t I be this man for her all the time? The one who could give himself over to her without fear of being destroyed again?
Merri let out a soft hum of contentment as she pulled back. My eyes were slow to open, as if keeping them closed might extend the moment we’d just shared. When they finally opened, I found the space around us transformed. I hadn’t paid much attention to it when I’d arrived, but I thought it had just been my room from the château. Now it was something far more sumptuous, the bed covered in a thick black comforter and the room filled with candlelight.
I arched a brow and gave her an inquisitive look. “Very romantic, hellcat.”
She shrugged, reaching up and brushing her fingers through my hair. “I thought we deserved it. Our first time wasn’t what I’d have chosen for us.”
Hearing her echo my thoughts from a few days ago made me smile. “Me neither.”
“So you like it?”
I grasped her arse and reeled her back into my body. “More than,” I admitted, my free hand weaving into her long hair and pulling her face back to mine.
Her little gasp of delight washed over me, settling directly between my legs.
I’d been more than a little bitter that I’d drawn the short straw when it came time to divvy out the dreamwalk assignments. I assumed that being last meant that Merri might forget about what was blossoming between us. But I should have known better. Merri never made any of us feel less than. Whoever she was with was the only person she was thinkingabout, the only one who mattered. And that was more than enough for me.
Oh hell, I was more of a romantic than I’d ever admitted to myself. But perhaps that wasn’t such a bad thing. Perhaps keeping myself closed off from everyone and everything had only hurt me in the end.
Scooping Merri up, I twisted until I could walk us to the bed. “You’re brilliant, Merri. In so many ways.”
Placing her in the center of the lush bedclothes, I took her in. The delicate black lace covering her was so sheer it was almost obscene, and the fall of her scarlet locks spilled down her shoulders. She was everything I never thought I could have.
I placed a knee on the bed, intending to crawl over her, but she stopped me with a hand to the chest. “This is more to me than just trying to get pregnant and feeding. I need you to know that. It started out as a means to an end, but I’m... attached to all four of you.”
Any lingering denial fled. Here, if nowhere else, I could be honest. With her and myself.
“For me too. I’m not like the others, Merri. I don’t do casual. I don’t know how. There’s no half-measure. It’s all or nothing for me.”
Fisting the fabric of my shirt, she pulled me toward her. “All, Malice. Give me all of you.”
