Page 36 of Knowing You
I’m failing. Failing with the plan to sign Casey. That must mean I’m failing in the glamour stakes as well. For a moment, it’s as if I’m back in the playground of Applegrove Primary with no friend group. I glance down at myself and all of a sudden miss my odd socks. Who am I kidding? As if I could carry off a transparent top and tight jeans. I must look a right joke.
‘Vi?’
‘What? Sorry. It’s all very exciting for you. Great news,’ I say brightly, without giving him eye contact.
He takes off his jacket and fully displays his Jackson Pollock style T-shirt to the room like a peacock fanning its tail. I’m embarrassed to think back to my flirting now over cocktails. Talk about out of my league.
‘Look, Vi, I’m working on my agent about Thoth,’ he says. ‘It’s clear from what you say that they’d have a real vision and passion and honestly, I—’
‘Don’t worry. Really. I don’t have any expectations.’
Casey says something else but I hardly hear. As if I could compete with Beatrix Bingham. It’s not as if he’s asked me out on a date. It’s a Chapter Battle. I need to get a grip.
I breathe a sigh of relief as the landlord announces the start of the proceedings and amongst the clapping it’s too noisy for anyone to talk. The first author takes to the dance floor. His hand shakes as he holds the mike as if it could predict the boos that were going to arrive after just two paragraphs.
‘Too many adverbs,’ whispers Casey.
‘And not a gripping enough start,’ I say without looking away from the mike, inwardly waging a battle against my negative thoughts.
My pulse rate slows as I feel the welcome embrace of my comfort zone now that we are talking about words. The next author takes position and starts to read. She lasts longer and even garners a few laughs.
‘Not bad. That was funny,’ says Casey and waves to her. She blows him a kiss.
‘She just needs to make the dialogue sound more realistic,’ I say. ‘Of course, there’s no doubt you’ll win.’
‘Don’t jinx it. Look, about the submissions,’ he says but is interrupted as the landlord calls his name. A chink of sunlight breaks through the side window and I put on my sunglasses as Casey begins.
The barman takes a break from pulling pints. A man next to me stops scrunching his crisp packet. Silence falls as Casey begins to read. The prologue is a sensuous scene of two characters dancing. It’s not obvious until the last paragraph that one of them isn’t from this planet and that revelation draws gasps.
A woman whistles and claps just before he finishes, as if she knew the end was imminent. I turn left to look and my mouth goes dry.
Beatrix? And Lenny?
It can’t be.
It is.
My heart pounds.
I’m amazed they’ve spurned the glamorous meet and greet at Alpaca Books. This isn’t happening. He must be carrying on our weekend tradition of Camden lunches. Wearing funky shorts and a stylish halter neck top, she heads over to Casey and kisses him on both cheeks. Perfume wafts across the room and smells like the most expensive thing in the pub.
It chokes me as if it’s poisonous gas. I inhale and exhale, trying to take back control of my emotions as she moves her arm up and down his shoulder and pulls his collar gently. He bends down and whispers something in her ear. Casey’s laugh drifts over to me.
My chair scrapes as I stand up and feel dizzy for a second. I navigate the chairs and head for the door. Just as I pass, Lenny steps backwards and into me.
‘Watch where you’re going,’ he mutters without turning around.
I lower my head and escape into the spring air. Please don’t let him recognise me. I head up the side street and then left towards the station. Footsteps sound behind me. Instinctively I quicken my pace. Lenny must have turned to look. This isn’t part of the plan. I need to look my very best when he sees the new Violet Vaughan – not this half-baked version who, at the moment, hasn’t convinced Casey to give Thoth Publishing a chance. I still have a few weeks left to turn things around. However, fingers curl around my elbow. I try to shake it off but the grip becomes tighter.
‘Vi?’
Casey. Thank God. Oh no. He darts in front of me. I can’t meet his eye.
‘What’s the matter? Why did you leave? Is everything all right?’
‘Yes. Sorry. I should have said goodbye. I just don’t feel well. I didn’t want to cause a fuss.’ I force a smile. ‘Well done on the reading, Casey. You were fantastic. Best of luck withAlien Hearts. I’m sure it’s going to be a smash hit.’
‘Vi, about submissions. Look at me for a minute.’
