Page 56 of Knowing You
‘Not really. Busy day at work.’
‘Should I take her to hospital for a check over?’ asks Casey.
‘No. No, honestly. No fuss. I’m feeling fine.’
Suze nudges me to take another glassful of water. ‘I think you’ll be okay but get yourself down to Accident and Emergency if you get a headache or feel sick, or if you get any pains or feel dizzy. You probably just need to sleep it off, rehydrate and have something decent to eat.’
Casey helps me to my feet. People shoot me sympathetic smiles. Melvin comes over.
‘How are you, Vi?’ His words slur slightly. The room is full of smoke and I feel sick.
‘We’re leaving. Cheers Melvin. See you soon, mate.’ Casey slips an arm around my shoulders.
‘No, honestly – you stay here. I’ll get a taxi home,’ I say.
‘It’s three in the morning already. I’m ready to leave and you aren’t going anywhere on your own. In fact, come back to mine, Vi. Let me look after you. And my breakfasts are legendary. We’re talking pancakes with cherries and Greek yogurt with—’
Too tired to argue, I nod. We don’t speak in the taxi. I sit next to Casey, my head against his shoulder, my eyes closed. I don’t object when he helps me off with my jeans and settles me under the duvet in his double bed. He turns the lights off and sits in a nearby chair. He yawns.
I hold out one hand. ‘Don’t be silly, Casey. Sleep in here with me.’
‘It’s okay. I’m fine here.’
Tears prick my eyes. Am I really that much of a freak? A sob escapes my lips. I try to disguise it as some sort of cough but within seconds Casey is crouched on the floor, by my side.
‘Vi?’
I pull him nearer. Our mouths meet. He’s so gentle. I unbutton his shirt.
‘Vi? Are you sure?’
Perhaps it’s my collapse. Perhaps it’s being here in the dead of night. Or maybe it’s the alcohol, but this time I don’t think about my own body. All I can think about is his.
2001
It’s near the end of November. Mrs Warham is still cross. I can’t remember the last time she asked me to take the register to the office. I used to do that often. It’s a very important job. At least Mum is giving me ice cream on a Friday again. Every day, she asks me what’s been going on with Alice. She came in to see Mrs Warham a few days after Bonfire Night. Mum was very red in the face afterwards but gave me the thumbs up.
But I still dread school. My tummy hurts every morning. Since spilling the gravy, Alice has kept her distance. She just sticks her tongue out and turns her back on me. I pretend that it isn’t happening. Sometimes I hang out with the boys. Since the fun snaps, they’ve started asking if I want to play football. But not every day. My books help me to not feel quite so lonely. They don’t stick their leg out for me to trip over. They don’t pinch my arm or laugh at my glasses and hair. They aren’t mean like Alice’s group. Always there offering me escape from a life I hate, they are my best friends in the world – apart from Flint.
It’s Saturday and Mum’s boss, Ryan, is here. They are going to watch box sets. It turns out they like the same shows. She asked if I wanted them to take me to the cinema. I shook my head. Now I hate the weekends too.
Mum did ask if I minded Ryan coming around to the house. What could I say?Yes. I hate having another man here doing Uncle Kevin’s things like making you laugh and helping you unblock the sink. And it’s not fair. You have a good friend. So should I. I hate you for making me stop seeing Flint.And he’s much more fun than stupid Ryan.
However, Mum doesn’t know that I have a secret.
A big one.
I haven’t stopped seeing Flint after all.
I usually catch him on the way back from school. After Mum’s gone in, he appears outside and we chat. I even managed to smuggle him inside yesterday. Mum ran a bath when I got home so I waited a while before me and Flint headed up to my bedroom with drinks, trying to keep in our giggles. Mum came in to ask what I wanted for tea and he hid under the bed. Flint stayed until my burger was ready. We agreed to meet in the treehouse today.
Mum lets me eat cheese and pickle sandwiches in my room for lunch. Afterwards I creep downstairs. I peek into the lounge. Mum and Ryan are on the sofa. His arm is around her. They are watching a programme with women in pretty dresses and men in suits. I go into the garden and quietly shut the back door. Mum has drawn the curtains so the telly is easier to watch. Good. She can’t see me squash through the fence and into Applegrove Wood.
I head to the tree house, my face turned downwards as I study pine cones and twisted roots. Perhaps I should find the woods scary but I don’t. All the fallen leaves are dead, and the sun can’t get through, but I’ve felt so sad lately it matches my mood.
I reach the treehouse. Flint is waiting at the bottom of the ladder. Instantly I feel better.
‘Ryan, Mum’s boss is around,’ I say and pull a face.
