Page 63 of Knowing You
My voice wavers. ‘My mum hits me too.’
That’s what Zoe would call a little white lie. She says they aren’t really bad. I’m not sure why. It’s not like white makes things better. I hate milk. And egg white. There’s nothing worse than a blank white page at the end of a school test. And Alice, with her holidays abroad, is always saying my white skin is horrid compared to hers, which is tanned.
He frowns and it makes him look older for a moment. ‘You’ve never said.’
Alice’s group cornered me the other day and punched me. They heard me telling the boys about putting the spider in her bag.
‘Don’t you believe me? My ribs are covered in bruises.’
‘Show me, Violet. Show me where you’re hurt.’
Flint nods so I take off my gloves, my coat and jumper. That leaves my vest. I hesitate as goosebumps appear on my skin.
Tim leans forward as I lift it up.
‘You said we were friends. And you said you’d protect me. There’s nothing for me at home. Mum has Ryan. Mrs Warham hates me. Alice and her lot are never going to stop being mean. Uncle Kevin is never coming back. You and Flint…’ A sob darts out of my throat. ‘You are the only people who care.’
I get cross with myself as tears run down my face. No one says anything for a few moments.
‘Okay.’ Tim rubs his forehead. ‘You and me, facing the world together.’
‘And Flint.’
‘Sure. That’s what I meant.’
I smile. Tim smiles back. We agree to meet at the treehouse at eight o’clock. Mum will be watching her Sunday night detective programme. I’ll pretend to be asleep in bed.
Tim gives me a much longer hug than usual when we say goodbye. Tells me I’m his special little girl. That he’ll always do right by me.
Tim makes me feel important. Grown up. Pretty.
Me and Flint and Tim. My own little group at last. We’ll all look out for each other.
It’s going to be ace.
Chapter 26
Every evening this week I’ve spent in the office. Every night I’ve been out jogging, apart from Wednesday when I stayed at Casey’s. A toothbrush of mine now resides in his bathroom. I’ve discovered it’s true that his pancakes are second-to-none. I could tell that even though I only ate a few mouthfuls.
I didn’t like leaving Flossie on her own again. Bella slept over at her boyfriend’s too. I nipped back after work to check the litter tray and left food down and headed back after an early breakfast with Casey to change clothes and see her once more.
Do I feel guilty? Bella insists my life can’t revolve around a mere animal. Sometimes it used to. Once when Flossie was ill, I booked two days off work. But things have changed. They’ve had to.
Tonight – in precisely an hour – I’ll be meeting Casey outside the Anubis hotel. The canapés have been ordered. The jazz band’s song list has been approved. Yesterday I helped the interns fill the last of the goody bags. Each contains a gold pen in the shape of an Egyptian obelisk, a tote bag bearing the Thoth logo, an Egyptian musk fragranced candle and two of our latest paperback releases.
I finally finish applying my gold nail varnish and blow on it to dry.
‘Patience,’ says Bella and smiles. She shakes her head. ‘I can’t believe how well that airbrush tan sets off the white dress. You look untouchable. I’m so proud of how you’ve stuck to the plan.’
I glance at my golden arms and remember Alice, a girl from school, who used to say I was whiter than glue – and stuck around just as bad.
‘I couldn’t have done it without you,’ I say.
Bella takes my elbow and leads me from my bedroom to the lounge. We stand in front of the mirror. This final week of juicing has paid off. I’m now sporting celebrity cheeks and collar bones. Bella helped me find a suitable dress online that’s Egyptian-themed, but in a subtle way. The pleated material clings to my body, its upper edge cutting under the chest. Rising up from that were two shoulder straps that neatly covered my breasts and produced a low cleavage.
I wear a beaded gold necklace with a matching bracelet we found in Camden market. Bella chose them. She also decides on my make-up and applies it for me, the black kohl eyeliner being slightly thicker than normal.
I stare at myself in the mirror. Are those tears in Bella’s eyes?
