Page 67 of Knowing You
‘Oh come on – just be honest.’ My voice trembles. ‘A man like you wouldn’t have looked twice at the old Violet.’
‘A man like me? And now I’m a liar? Talk about judging a book by its cover.’ His voice is hard-edged now.
Casey pulls out his phone. Enters Instagram. Presses on a photo and shows it to me. It’s a woman with very short black hair. She’s a little bigger than I used to be. Not a scrap of make-up. A fun-filled smile.
‘That’s my last girlfriend. We were together for almost a year.’ He puts his phone away. ‘You assumed things about me that aren’t true. You judged me by my appearance just as you seem to think people used to judge you. I’d say that makes you a hypocrite of the highest order and not the person I’ve… I’ve… Do I know you at all?’
I blink rapidly.
It’s as if I’ve gone to the cinema and ended up watching the wrong movie.
‘But… but Lenny would never have looked at Beatrix if she’d looked like me.’
‘Who or what has made you believe that?’
I think for a moment. Only one name came to mind.
I’d hung onto her every word. I needed a friend and she provided the answers I couldn’t find.
Bella.
‘Please. This is just a misunderstanding. What we’ve got… I’ve never felt like this about anyone.’ My eyes feel wet. ‘You’ve got to believe me.’
‘How can I believe a single word that comes out of your mouth?’ He shakes his head. ‘You know the crazy part? Something that all fell into place when Beatrix showed me that photo? Something that’s been niggling at me?’
‘What?’
‘It started when I washed your hair at the salon and realised it was curly. This jolted a memory but I haven’t been able to pin it down before this moment. I remember because it was Valentine’s Day. We were on the underground. You had your jumper on inside out. I loved your style. And your hair. I thought that was a woman I’d like to ask out.’
The tall man in the cap who’d worn sunglasses even though it was winter? He’d flirted with me. How striking he was.
That was Casey?
He’d liked me, the old me that Lenny had dumped?
But that would mean… everything Bella’s said…
Could she have been wrong?
‘You’d really have manipulated my career, regardless of what was best?’ Casey wrinkles his nose. ‘And here I am thinking you truly lovedAlien Hearts.’
‘I did. Do. Casey, at least believe this.’ I kneel on the floor and take his hands.
Please don’t let me lose him.
‘Books have always been what it’s about for me. Not the authors. I couldn’t have encouraged you to sign with Thoth if I didn’t passionately and utterly believe it was the best editorial home for your story.’
He removes his hands from mine and stands up. I get to my feet too. My knees feel as if they might buckle.
‘I’ve been so confused these last few months – about myself,’ I say. ‘My friends. My life. Everything, apart from you. You’re the one thing I’m sure about.’
Casey straightens his jacket.
‘Don’t go,’ I whisper.
Chapter 28
I sit slumped by the bar and nod for another top up. A waiter fills my glass with prosecco. I hardly notice his flirtatious smile. Felicity’s presentation went well, I think. I’m not really listening when she comes over to talk.
