Page 83 of The Summer Island Swap
They talked to Jackie about Chatty and she told them his story. Amy chipped in with tales of the other animals the conservation project looked after. Steve took the flask from Jackie and topped up my cup. He and I chatted.
‘Seriously,’ said Steve and stared at the ground. ‘The way me and the guys have behaved – well, mainly me. I just didn’t think about how the monkey felt. And the loud behaviour… the litter… I… I’ve kind of lost the plot, the last year or two. The divorce with the wife hit me hard.’ He shook his head and looked up. ‘I’ve been egging my friends on to make this into a real lads’ weekend, as if we’re twenty years younger. We’d like to apologise.’
‘It’s not your fault my sister and I went on a picnic,’ I said.
He shrugged. ‘I saw the panic on Rick’s face when he ran back to the house to get waterproofs for you both. He muttered something about an argument about Chatty. How he’d said something stupid. I brought all that on and I’m truly sorry.’ Steve left to fill up Amy’s cup.
Rick caught my eye and came over.
37
‘How do you feel?’ he asked.
‘Fine, thanks. Sorry for all the trouble.’
‘If anyone’s to blame, it’s me. How did you manage?’
‘We built a tent, out of leaves and branches.’ Tentatively I took his hand and led him around to the back of nearby trees. ‘It doesn’t look much now but it did the job.’
He didn’t let go of my fingers. ‘Sarah, I’m sorry, the things I said… I was frantic with worry about Chatty and took it out on you. I know you’ve helped out through the goodness of your heart. All the hours you’ve put in… You’ve been incredible. I just didn’t understand why you kept losing your job a secret and… I can’t bear being lied to.’ A cloud darker than the ones we’d run from this afternoon crept over his face.
‘Do you want to talk about it?’
He bit his bottom lip.
‘You don’t have to.’
‘I do. I owe you an explanation.’ He reached up for Amy’s belt and held the two ends in each of his hands, pulling them hard. ‘Three years ago, just before I jacked in my job and moved over here to set up Seagrass Conservation… I was engaged. We met at work. She was an oil spill response advisor.’
‘Sounds impressive.’
‘Yes. Gabby loved her job. Loved the money. She seemed so confident with her bright red lipstick and professional reputation that was second to none. But she told lie after lie. Big ones. Small ones. When I found out she called off the wedding, a week before it was due to take place.’
‘Oh Rick… that must have been such a shock. Was… was there someone else?’
‘Everyone thought one of us must have cheated. But no. Nothing like that but it was complicated to explain to people, you see. When we first met, at my desk, a friend had left a packet of cigarettes there. She thought they were mine. Told me she smoked too. When she found out I didn’t, she stopped – said I’d inspired her. Made a big thing of it. Every time that conversation came up during the relationship, she told me how I’d transformed her life. But the truth was she never used to smoke at all.’
‘Why make up something like that?’
‘Gabby lied over money as well. She was always buying me presents but secretly ran up huge debts. It turned out she wasn’t well. Gabby had an eating disorder. Despite her incredible success at work and looks that were always earning her appreciative looks, she didn’t feel good enough. She was the first in her family to go to university and felt anything but leading a perfect life would let her proud parents down. She’d lied to me about so many things to cover up her problem… made up all sorts of food intolerances. Got out of big family food events with my family, like Christmas, by pretending her gran had died. That particular lie became so elaborate. She even took a day off work for the supposed funeral.’
‘Gosh. I’m sorry. Sorry for her. Sorry for you.’
‘I can see now that it wasn’therlying – it was the illness. I hope she’s doing okay. But… it left me with all sorts of questions, such as didn’t she think I’d want to help? But then I did my own research… began to understand just how she must have struggled with such a big secret. My heart broke when I thought about how she’d been suffering on her own.’ He pulled the belt tighter. ‘It broke even more when she pushed me away. I felt so helpless. And then all of her lies that we became entangled in… it just got too much. I really loved her. Thought we had a future together. It took about a year to get over the fact that I thought I’d known a person so well when, in fact, I hardly knew them at all. I told her none of the past mattered and that we’d get her treatment, together. But she was too embarrassed and broke it off a couple of days after admitting the truth. Ghosted me everywhere on social media. Did her best to avoid me at work.’
‘I can’t imagine how that must have felt.’
‘I’m over it now and some good came out of it – the breakup made it easier for me to decide to give up my career and move here.’ He rolled up the belt and put it in his pocket.
‘Ishouldhave told you about my unemployment. There was opportunity enough. I can see how it looked odd. It’s just… you know the way Lee is with you – the brother who thinks he knows best?’
Rick nodded.
‘I’ve always wanted to protect Amy – like Lee after your accident. I know she’s grown up and it seems ridiculous but I hate the thought of her ever being upset. It makes me feel sick inside. A sickness I used to feel as a child. Dad could be so vindictive – in a sly way. If Amy got hurt, it hurt me too.’
He took my hand again and his grip tightened.
‘I don’t blame you for your outburst,’ I continued. ‘If our cat, Nelly, was ever taken my head would be all over the place. The truth is, today, it’s made me… What I mean is… how we’ve been together these last weeks… you and me… you see…’ I draped both my arms around his neck and stood on tiptoe. I pressed my lips firmly against his, heat glowing through my body as if it was midday and the clouds had parted. He kissed back, gently at first, then stronger, harder.
