30
Nik’s face jerked back. ‘Crikey, Jess, what’s going on?’
I took his hand. ‘I like you, Nik. A lot. And I think you like me.’
He stepped back. ‘You’re great – really, but… look, can we turn on the lights?’
Of course, open, sunny Nik wouldn’t want to make love in the dark. But I bit my lip. That wasn’t what he meant.
‘Whatever you prefer.’ I went to the wall by the kitchen and flicked a switch, a tide of heat sweeping up my neck and into my face.
‘Jess… look… let’s sit down.’ He moved towards the sofa. ‘I think there’s been a misunderstanding.’
I couldn’t move, wishing I were invisible, wishing a secret door would suddenly appear, headed by the word Exit…
‘I’m sorry but I don’t think of you in that way.’
… or a sink hole would do because it was sinking in that I’d made a mistake.
He walked back to me and placed his hands on my arms.
‘I’m really flattered. Any bloke would be lucky to have you as his girlfriend. I’m sorry if, somehow, I’ve given you the wrong impression.’ ‘He took his hands away. ‘We’ve hit it off. Clicked, haven’t we? That doesn’t happen often in life – but for me it’s just friendship… a friendship I don’t want to lose.’ He stared at me intently.
‘But when you came over to dinner – you took me into my bedroom, to the window, and said the view was romantic. You gave me red roses.’ I needed to shut up but I couldn’t stop trying to validate myself out loud. ‘And at Pebble Rock you said I’d made England feel like home for you.’
Nik looked puzzled. ‘And I meant every word.’
‘You loved my dress when I came to yours.’ It was tight and short.
‘It was red,’ he said, ‘like the roses – my favourite colour.’ He slid down into the sofa and held his head in his hands. Buddy padded over and nuzzled them. He looked up. ‘Please forgive me. This is my fault.’
Not really knowing what to say, I glanced down at my wrist and the charm bracelet. Nik caught my eye.
‘The craft pack – it said friendship bracelets. That’s what I made, Jess.’
‘I feel so stupid,’ I said, my throat tight around the words. ‘The heart… I thought…’
‘That charm isn’t about me.’
‘Oh…’ I went to take it off.
‘Please, keep it – this connection between us… it’s important.’
‘So you aren’t single?’
‘I am. Life’s been busy. I’ve put everything into the business. In fact, this trip is making me reassess my life on several levels. Getting to know the residents of Willow Court has made me realise how important family is. That’s why I spend so much time with Glenda.’
I sat down next to him. ‘Sorry for making you feel so uncomfortable.’ Now my hands covered my eyes. ‘I feel so embarrassed but I can’t escape as we’re in my flat.’
Gently, Nik peeled my fingers away. ‘Don’t be. You’re one hell of a Sheila. We’re both blaming ourselves for this – perhaps that means we’re even and it doesn’t have to change anything.’
My chest felt lighter. Oddly, the rejection was beginning to give me just a tiny sense of… relief?
‘Mate to mate, Jessie – I’m a straight up kind of guy, right?’
I nodded.
‘If I say you’re fantastic, you bloody are. So how about taking a compliment?’