Page 79 of The Winter We Met
‘How about… cheers, Seb for sacrificing your low-fat, sugar free diet for one evening.’
I couldn’t help laughing. ‘Right – like you’re sticking to that at the weekend.’
He thrust a salsa-scented candle into my hand. ‘This will really make us feel like we’re in Mexico, it’ll be like a little winter holiday for just you and me. I’ve even put together a Mexican folk music playlist.’ He tapped on his phone.
An hour later we sat up the breakfast bar. A lime-green inflated cactus sat in the middle. My eyes widened at the spread. Tortillas. Chicken fried with red and green peppers. Shredded lettuce. Guacamole. Sour cream. Black bean and couscous salad. Tomato and herb rice. Refried beans.
‘Bon appetit,’ he said, ‘although first things first.’ He went over to one of the bags and pulled out two sombreros.
‘Are you serious?’
‘I’m here to put the fun back into your Saturday night. Now eat up.’
My mouth filled with the spiced flavours and textures of Mexico, with the sour cream contrasting the hot fried chicken and satisfying tortillas complimenting the light rice.
‘Oh boy… that hit the spot,’ I said when I finally finished. ‘I had no idea you were such a good cook.’
‘I always do better when I’m cooking for someone I care about.’
A lump formed in my throat as he cleared the dishes away and I hurried into the bathroom. I slid down the tiled wall and sat on the floor, covering my face. The hat fell off. I cried quietly, a habit I’d never shaken off from my childhood. Of course, I should have realised Seb would know. From outside the staff room door he could hear if anyone so much as opened a bar of chocolate. He knocked at the door.
‘Jessie? What’s the matter?’ The door pushed open.
‘Ignore me. It’s been a long day.’
He picked up the sombrero and held out his hand. I took it. He pulled me up and led me back to the breakfast bar.
‘Don’t say a word, just eat,’ he ordered and put a plate with the biggest brownie and squirt of whipped cream in front of me.
‘Sorry, I—’
‘I said not a word. Not until you’ve savoured every second of that moist chocolate.’
‘You know I don’t like the word moist.’
He caught my eye and we both smiled.
‘Oh Seb. I’ve been such an idiot.’ I told him all about Nik’s rejection and how Oliver was out on a date and how I felt like the only person in the world in on a Saturday night. How worried I was about Mum getting in touch – that it might have a bad effect on Gran if she got let down again. Then there was the care home move and the increasing stress at work – I loved my job but with everything else that had been going on, I felt worn out. ‘I must have upset Nik, upset Gran, Oliver too – recently he said he loved our flat, it proved that home was where the heart was… but in a rash moment I said he should move out and now it looks as if he might. To top it all off they’ve just cancelled my favourite Netflix series.’
‘That last one is really bad.’
I rolled my eyes at him and sniffed. ‘At least Gran is happy with her new place. I’m okay really. All the pressure should slowly ease off now.’
I went to stand by the window again. Seb joined me.
‘I can’t help feeling I’m partly to blame,’ he said. ‘I was convinced that Nik had the hots for you… I don’t know how I got it so wrong. I pride myself on being astute when it comes to matchmaking and working out who suits you.’
It was true, Seb often came in on a Monday morning with news of how another dinner party at his place, with carefully chosen guests, had resulted in a new couple starting to date.
‘We both did. You were only trying to help. Nik treats everyone as if they’re special. I think that was our downfall, thinking he was only doing that with me.’
‘What out of all those things is getting you down the most?’
‘None of them. All of them.’ Worry about Gran and Oliver the most. I gazed down at a car driving past with fake antlers fitted to the front lights.
‘You know what Tim often says? Whenever someone is in a rut and feels like the world is against them, he reckons the way out is usually staring someone straight in the face. It takes an outsider to spot the obvious, so let’s talk it all through.’
‘I’m really worried about Gran and Mum – but am also still smarting a little after Nik turned me down and for some reason Oliver meeting Krish is making it worse. As for him moving out, I can’t even… We’ve built such a comfortable life together, with Buddy and Gran, all this silly arguing, it’s got out of hand…’ A stab of pain went through my chest. The prospect of Oliver leaving was making me face just how much I cared about him.
