Page 87 of When You're Home
“I’m so sorry, Ev,” she offered again as she wrung her hands together in her lap.
“I’m sorry too, beautiful. Over the last few years I convinced myself the best way to love you was to stick to the arrangement and just do what you said you wanted me to do. I should have tried harder. There’s nothing I regret more than not fighting harder for us,” he professed.
“Why did you let me get away with it for so long?”
Because I love you. He knew he owed her a better explanation though.
“That night you came across the fence? The night we started this whole arrangement? You gave me the smallest glimmer of hope that night. I’ve held onto it for years. I told myself that if I could just be patient, if I could just play the game well enough, that maybe we’d get here one day.”
“You held on for maybe?”
“I held on for you. I never gave up on us, Tori. And I never will,” he promised. “But we can’t keep living in the past. We have a hell of a lot of time to make up for, and I plan to start right now.” He squeezed her hand gently. He considered pulling over at the next rest stop to show her exactly what he meant, but his desire to get her to the cabin before dark outweighed the physical lust building between them in his tiny car.
Tori squeezed his hand in return, then let out a muffled yawn, bringing her hand to her mouth and scrunching her eyes closed.
“Why don’t you try to close your eyes and rest? We’ve got another two hours until we get to the cabin, and I can only imagine how exhausted you probably feel right now.”
She smiled and nodded before pulling her legs up under her body and curling into the seat.
She loved him. She had never wanted anyone else.
He loved her too. He had loved for every second of every damn day for the last ten years, if not longer, and now he was finally allowed to admit it.
It was almost dark by the time they pulled up the driveway of the cabin, but there was still a lightness to their surroundings thanks to the later sunset. Tori had slept for most of the drive after their talk, which was okay with Rhett. He needed that time to think.
She had woken up when they crossed the bridge into town, but they hadn’t spoken much over the last fifteen minutes. The silence wasn’t awkward, but it still felt heavy. He wondered for the dozenth time that day if bringing her to the cabin had been the right move.
Tori unbuckled her seatbelt and wordlessly opened the door, pulling his Arch sweatshirt sleeves down and crossing her arms in front of her as she stepped out of the car. Rhett watched her in the mirror as she circled around to the trunk. She moved slowly but with intention. He wasn’t sure if she was still tired or just feeling weighed down by all she was carrying. Either way, he was determined to make her feel lighter this weekend.
Rhett exited the car and stretched his arms over his head, letting his back and arms crack a few times before following her.
She was leaning against the bumper of the Prelude. A bright smile illuminated her face and reached up to her eyes.
“You look happy,” he observed, tilting his head toward her and spinning his keys on his finger. Tori read his intentions and pushed off the back of the car, taking a few steps down the pebbled path toward the lake. It took all Rhett’s restraint not to follow her, to wrap his arms around her, to pull her body into his. But even though they had talked through their biggest issues on the drive, he didn’t want to get ahead of himself.
“I am happy,” she confirmed, turning to smile at him over her shoulder. “This is the first time I’ve felt fully inside my own body since yesterday afternoon.”
“Do you want to go down there now?” he asked, lifting his chin toward the bench swing at the lake’s edge.
Tori shook her head.
“We’re staying until Monday, right? I’ll get plenty of lake time this weekend. Right now I’ve got to pee, and I’m finally hungry. I haven’t eaten much since yesterday morning,” she admitted. She hadn’t eaten anything at all over the last thirty hours, according to Jake. Bringing her here had definitely been the right choice.
“Let me just grab the bags. Do you remember the code to get in?”
Tori nodded, then proceeded to walk up to the side entrance and punch the numbers into the keypad. She opened the cabin door and disappeared inside as Rhett popped the trunk of the car.
He got everything inside the cabin in just two trips. He would need to go to the store tomorrow since they hadn’t made a grocery run in advance, but Maddie had assured him there was plenty of food in the freezer to hold them over tonight.
He locked his car and quietly entered the kitchen. He grabbed their bags but stalled. They were here. They were alone. That usually meant they shared the master bedroom. But Rhett didn’t want to presume anything, and he sure as hell wasn’t going to pressure her to confirm their relationship status tonight.
His mind made up, he dropped her bag near the master bedroom, then pivoted to head downstairs to one of the basement bedrooms with his own belongings. His foot had just hit the first step when he heard her voice.
“Where are you going?” she demanded as she emerged from the bedroom.
“Uh,” Rhett faltered, “I’m just running my bag downstairs. I’ll be right back up, then I’ll make dinner for us.”
“Why are you putting your stuff downstairs?” Her tone was clipped, almost accusing. Realization passed on her face as she looked from the basement stairs to his bag.
