Page 68 of While You're There
She ripped open the yellow package and dumped several pieces of candy into her mouth as she made her way back to the waiting area. She considered doing a few laps in the hallway rather than sit back down in that horribly hard chair, but she didn’t want to wander too far.
She turned the corner and stopped in her tracks, freezing in place as she took in the sight before her. His legs were spread wide in the chair, his head bowed low. He had the tips of his fingers tented so he could rest his forehead in his hands. He must have come out to find her the moment she ducked into the Family Lounge.
“Ev?” she questioned, her heart fracturing as she took in the ghost of the man before her. Nothing but anguish filled his eyes when he lifted his head at the sound of her voice.
“You’re still here,” he breathed out.
This was exactly what she was afraid of. She wasn’t going anywhere, and she needed him to know that. She made her way over to him in three strides, meeting him toe-to-toe as he rose up from the seat she had been occupying just minutes ago.
“I’m here,” she promised, wrapping her arms around his torso and pulling him close. “I’m not going anywhere. I just went to get some snacks.”
They didn’t say anything for a few breaths, instead just holding each other. She tried to give him everything in that moment: all her love, all her strength. Every ounce of support she could pass into him, every bit of comfort she could spare. He returned her embrace, but she could feel the feebleness in his hug. He was just barely holding on.
“That’s what I came out here to talk to you about, V. I think you should go home.”
She pulled back and glanced up at him without dropping her arms. “Rhett…” She wasn’t going to leave him. Not here. Not alone. Not like this.
“They still haven’t even sent up the goddamn ultrasound tech to confirm anything,” he explained. He brushed a loose hair away from her face and tucked it behind her ear out of habit. He looked so defeated, but at least his eyes weren’t so hazy anymore.
“It’s almost two a.m. Chandler is going to be here the rest of the night, and maybe into tomorrow, depending on what they say when they finally examine her. I think she knows it’s… it’s over. But she won’t take any pain meds yet just in case. She’s a mess, she’s exhausted, and she’s in a ton of pain.”Tori swallowed down the thump in her throat. Finding out her husband’s former hookup was pregnant with his child was hard. But standing in the hospital and listening to details of their loss was an entirely different kind of anguish.
“I think I need to stay with her.” He was right. He needed to be here. Tori knew him well enough to know he’d never forgive himself if he wasn’t here. She nodded in earnest, not even sure what she was agreeing to, but knowing she was willing to do whatever she could to support him.
“But I think I need to stay here alone.”
Hell no. She wouldn’t leave him. He was just barely hanging on. He needed to stay, and she needed to be here to support him.
“No, Rhett, I want to be here for…”
“I know, beautiful. I know. Iwantyou here, too. The selfish part of me wants you to stay and hold me and just be here with me. I can’t even sit in that fucking room without thinking about you out here, V. I can’t stop worrying about what you’re thinking, what you’re feeling, what you need. I keep getting distracted thinking about how tired you probably feel after that drive. You’ve been up since sunrise. You’ve been up for almost twenty-four hours.”
“So have you,” she argued feebly. There was no real fight behind her words. She wanted to be here to support him, but she didn’t want to be a distraction either. She wasn’t willing to make things harder for him or for Chandler right now. And if she was honest with herself, she was relieved at the idea of not having to sit here all night and into tomorrow.
She watched as Rhett turned his head away from her, no doubt feeling the shame deep in his gut that he couldn’t hide in his voice. He worked his jaw back and forth as he stared off down the hallway. After a few more seconds of contemplation, he finally spoke again.
“This is my mess. I did this. I screwed up so fucking bad, and now I have to deal with the consequences. I’ve been freaking out for the last hour, debating whether it was worse to ask you to stay or to go. But you should never have had to be here in the first place, beautiful. It’s my fault you’re here. It’s my fault Chandler’s here. It’s my fault you had to drive me. It’s all my fucking fault.” His voice cracked on the last word, snapping all the stoicism she had worked so hard to maintain for him.
Tears silently started to fall down her face. She wasn’t upset about being asked to leave. She was just so sad that this was happening. That they were here. That Chandler was in there. None of this would have ever been their reality if she hadn’t made him…
“Don’t,” Rhett demanded, snapping her out of her thoughts. “Please, V. Please don’t cry,” he begged. “If you cry, I’ll break. All I want to do is make this go away. To take away your pain. To take back everything I did and every choice I made that landed us here. But it’s too late for that now. I can’t undo what’s been done. I can’t undo it anymore than I can ask you to stay. I don’t know if this is the right thing to do or not, but I think I have a plan.”
She offered him the smallest smirk. The whole world could be crashing down around them, and Everhett Wheeler would somehow still come up with a plan.
“I’m going to stay here, in Columbus, for now. Not because I want to be here, or because I don’t want to be with you—”
“I know. You don’t have to spend one second worrying about that, Ev. I’ve already said it once tonight, but you don’t have to worry about me or about our relationship. Not now. Not ever.”
“I love you so goddamn much,” he breathed out in a rush, crashing his mouth into hers for just a second before pulling back and looking her in the eye to finish explaining.
“I’m going to stay here, and it might be a few days, depending on what happens. Chandler told me she got dropped off at the ER tonight by someone who lives in her building. She just moved into a new apartment and started an internship this week. She doesn’t know anyone in Columbus, and her parents don’t even know that she’s… that she was pregnant.”
Tori nodded her understanding. Rhett had to stay with Chandler. He had to take care of her. She knew his heart and the fabric of his being wouldn’t allow him to do anything less. That didn’t make the reality of the situation burn any less.
“I don’t want you driving back tonight, but I don’t want you stuck here all night either. What do you think about calling Jake to come get you?”
She ran her teeth over her lower lip as she considered her options. Part of her wished Rhett would just let her take the Prelude home, but the idea of having to come back down to pick him up sometime in the next few days was almost as unappealing as waking her dad up and asking him to come get her. She knew Jake had to work in the morning—he would barely have enough time to make it to Columbus and back before the start of his early shift at Clinton’s. But she also knew he would come, no questions asked. And when it was time to ask questions, she could give him honest answers, which she wouldn’t feel comfortable sharing with anyone else.
Only Jake would do.
