Page 96 of The Story of Us
Like I’m a lie.
He blinked and realised everyone at the table was staring at him.
“I fucked up,” Nate said, unable to stop the words from coming out.
Garrett’s attempt at an easy laugh was abysmal. It was a honking sound, too loud, too big. “He’s delirious with jetlag. Only got off the plane a few hours ago. His best friend’s getting married this weekend and the big guy is the best man, so the timings are tight. Just sign the contract, buddy. You know the one you came all the way from Australia for?”
“I’m not a big guy,” Nate mumbled before pressing the heel of his palms into his eyes. “I shouldn’t be here.”
Visions of Eloise on his couch, in his arms, laughing up at him as she teased him about being such a Dorothy or a Blanche or a Rose filled his mind. Apparently, he was allThe Golden Girlsat different times. Then he remembered how she’d curl into him, her big brown eyes looking at him for guidance, for support. And now, when she needed him most, he was sitting on the other side of the world, going through the motions because that was his fail-safe move. The one that he’d decided was all he could ever have. Nate’s chest ached, and he pulled at his tie.
Garrett gripped his arm. “Would you excuse us? Nate’s clearly having a medical issue.”
Nate shook his head. “I shouldn’t be here,” he repeated.
“With Jemima Jenkins? Signing a deal that could secure your family’s financial future?” Garrett clicked his fingers in front of Nate’s face. “I need you to focus, buddy.”
“That’s not what I mean. I don’t care about the deal.”
“Not better,” Garrett hissed.
“I mean, shit. I’m sorry.” Nate turned to Jemima Jenkins, who was watching him with interest. “I really do think it’s great. It’s going to be a way to reach new readers and add another layer of creativity and exposure that I never imagined would be possible. This”—he cleared his throat and reached for the pen next to his fork—“freak out has nothing to do with that.”
“Why don’t you tell me what it’s about then?” Jemima Jenkins asked while he scribbled something like his signature on the dotted line.
“Turns out I’m an idiot, and I’ve ruined the best thing that ever happened to me.”
“Eloise?” she asked.
Nate dropped the pen, ignoring the littletingwhen it hit his side plate. “That obvious, huh?”
“I figured she was special if you dedicated and wrote a whole romance about her.”
Oh.“That was a mistake. No one was ever meant to see it.”
Jemima Jenkins placed her glass down on the table carefully and when she spoke, her tone was soft and even, but there was a hint of steeliness to it, like she wouldn’t let him lie to her. No wonder she was so damn successful. “It felt like a very personal story. Like there was more on the page than just words. I won’t blow smoke up your ass, but I’ll be honest. It’s been a while since a book made me feel so much. I’d publish it in a heartbeat if you’d let me.”
Nate shook his head. “It’s not for sale.” He’d never do that to Eloise. Exploit what they’d shared for professional gain.
“Why?”
“Because it’s not fiction. Not to me, at least, and it isn’t my story to tell.”
“Not because you think people will tease you for writing romance?” Jemima Jenkins jutted her chin forward, challenge dancing in her eyes. “Make fun of a man for acknowledging his feelings, showing the world that it’s okay to be vulnerable? Sounds like an opportunity if you ask me.”
An opportunity to be himself or, more accurately, who he wanted to be. The guy who stood up for what he wanted and didn’t pay attention to any of the noise because it didn’t matter.
“How’d you fuck it all up?” Jemima Jenkins helped herself to the breadbasket in the middle of the table and tore some sourdough into smaller pieces before dipping it into a small dish of olive oil.
“I panicked and left when she needed me.” Like a coward. God, Nate hated himself so much right now.
Jemima chewed slowly. “So, you say you’re sorry. Make it right.”
“It gets worse.”
The shrewd expression on Jemima Jenkins’s face was terrifying, or maybe it was just admitting out loud what he’d done.
“I haven’t been completely honest with her.”
