Page 50 of Love at First Sighting
I let out a sigh. There’s no guarantee he’s going to buy what I’m going to ask—to introduce me to Ian—but he’s already gone by the time I get out my next words. He’s literally poofed out of our vision, vanishing into the crowd around us.
“Oh,” Carter mutters. “That disappearing act was actually pretty good.”
I’ll have to explain to Carter later how much Sam commits to this bit. He’s transformed his West Hollywood apartment into what he calls asanctumand refers to his room as thebedchamber.There’s purple tufted upholstery on the bathroom walls. It’s a whole thing.
“Don’t worry,” I assure him. “I am going to get my way to Ian Forte. First, I just have to be cut in half.”
Chapter 14
Carter
“Contrary to popular belief, you don’t get Lyme disease from eating too many limes,” Lea announces to the table. “And it’s spelled with aY. No one knows that.”
Jet looks down at his empty plate, perplexed. “Yuh-limes?”
“It’s in the middle of it,” Lea yells.
“Oh no,” I mumble to myself.
The “dining chamber” is an old theater converted into a dining room. White-clothed tables for five sit on elevated platforms in front of a decadent stage with a shimmering red curtain. We’re near the middle, and it takes no time at all for El and me to zero in on the fact that Ian Forte is going to be in one of the private boxes near the back.
There’s a sheer curtain blocking my view, but each time a waitress walks out, I catch a glimpse of the monstrosities inside. Namely, an ice sculpture shaped like Ian Forte, a pyramid of penis-submarine-shaped vodka bottles, and faint puffs of cigar smoke polluting the room.
He’s going to have his eyes all over El in a little bit, and between that, El’s snobby friends, and her sparkling ex, I’m feeling deeply underwhelming. Getting things from people is more El’s strong suit than mine. She’s the schmoozer whoknows how to network. Typical PIS missions require being persuasive and savvy, and instead, on my single mission before this, I honestly got bullied. I don’t know what I expected. I’m a dedicated people pleaser, and El recently informed me I am a Cancer sun and moon.
“You’re sure you want to do this?” I ask.
El nods. “Of course. One of us has to get up close and personal with Ian, and no offense, but I think I’ll have a better chance.”
“None taken,” I say. “The way you look tonight…I’d hand over all the nuclear codes if you asked.”
El’s dark eyes drop down like she’s embarrassed. El’s entire business is being called beautiful. Her paycheck depends on it. I know El knows it, but something about whenIsay it is making her blush. The delusional part of my brain wonders if somewhere in that blush there’s a chance for us. A woman who has it all and a boy who has nothing at all.
“Judging by what I know about Ian Forte, maybe I should have worn something a little more revealing,” she laments. El glances down at her neckline and adjusts the bodice of her gown, giving her boobs an extra push up.
Fuck me.
It’s a good thing she didn’t wear something more revealing. Otherwise, I’d simply have no choice but to impale myself on the antlers of the egregious taxidermy deer head hanging on the wall.
Thankfully, I get a mental cold shower in the form of Jet lovingly crafting his napkin into a swan and moving on to sculpt Bex’s napkin.
“El, did you know we’re in the presence of a real Michelangelo?”
“Someone call the Vatican,” she says, rolling her eyes.
Before we even have water, Bex puts in a demanding order for jumbo lump crab cakes because “they’re vegan,” and within minutes, Jet slurps down a dozen oysters. The sound will live in my nightmares forever.
“These aresoscrummy,” she boasts when the crab cakes arrive. “Try a bite, Colin.”
El rolls her eyes and clearly doesn’t care if Bex sees or not. However, I do listen to Bex, poking at a crab cake and taking a tiny bite onto my fork. I eat it, contemplate it, then go in for another bite.
“This tastes like crab,” I mutter.
“It’s a crab cake,” El replies.
“But if it’s vegan, it shouldn’t be…realcrab.”
Maybeveganis British slang for something I don’t comprehend, because I’m just comprehending this is a crab cake.
