Page 28 of Mariposa
I don’t want to tell him that my only family left doesn’t want me home. Or the fact that my grandmother’s sickness is getting worse, and she’s not allowed any visitors in the hospital until she gets better. Or Adam and I haven’t talked because we’re too stubborn to address our relationship status. Even though it’s clear we’re over.
“Because I’d rather stay here and train. There are only a few more weeks until graduation, so why not?”
I’m technically not lying.
“My son surely misses you,” he states like he’s thousands of miles away, in a cold, distant tone, even when he’s just an arm’s reach away. Standing in front of me like the massive, feared, masculine, special operator that he is.
So, he does know about Adam and me.
“I’m sure he does, but—” I miss my footing when I try to stand straight, causing me to bump into his muscular triceps. I’m about to fall over again, but he catches me by the elbow.
The alcohol I snuck in is catching up to me. Can I get myself into more trouble tonight? The mood shifts between us, and a low buzz sizzles when I graze his rough skin.
He brings me back to my feet. His scent is so distinct andgood. I’m not sure if it’s his cologne or if it’s just…Kade. Either way, there’s a temptation to drown in it. I take a step back, andhe lets my arm go. My flesh is already missing how his calloused palms and veiny hands felt around me.
No. I really shouldn’t feel the pulse that’s beating in between my thighs right now. He’s my thirty-eight-year-old instructor and my ex-boyfriend’s dad.
Off-limits is an understatement.
“I can smell you.”
My brows lift.
“Fuck, I forgot to put on deodorant, didn’t I?” I scrunch my nose.
“You know what smell I’m talking about. Are you drunk? Is that why you’re stargazing a little too hard at the sky, Isla?” Mockery laces his words as he scorches me with that deadly glare.
“Nope,” I pop the p, slow as I slur drunkenly. I give a slow blink, my lips curving into a smile. “Not at all, Master Sergeant.” I salute him, hoping my humor distracts him from tearing into me. I try to stay still, but it feels like I’m on a damn carousel, and the ground is spinning. I blink again and purse my lips together. My emotions are giving me whiplash tonight. A minute ago, I was on the verge of a panic attack, and now I want to break out in drunken giggles. I do this a lot. Using humor as a blanket to disguise the pain.
“Is this funny to you, Isla?” He stalks forward, arms crossed against his chest. “Because this isn’t a fucking joke!”
Oh shit.
He’s really not the joking type.
“Almost getting yourself killed because you went past your drinking limits?” he barks like training is in session again. The vein in his neck bulges as he continues to rip me apart. Usually, I gladly take it but tonight is different. My walls are down.
“I can have you kicked out of the course for being irresponsibly drunk right now!OrI can send you to the hospitalto get a psych evaluation because I’m required to report it, and it’s the rule. I always follow the rules! And that’s what I’m trying to instill in all of you! You all aren’t children!” he snarls.
Shamed, my gaze drops.
Damn it. I can’t get kicked out. I’ve trained too hard for this school to lose it like this.
“I’m sorry, sir…I just.” My front teeth tug on my bottom lip.
“You just what?” he hisses.
“I take this school seriously. I’ve worked hard to get here, and graduating is my number one priority. I…”
Why does he have this effect on me? I don’t break. I don’t get scared easily, but the cruelest operator known to the military is in front of me…and even I am not immune to the way his eyes scream a thousand truths. With one look, you’ll know that Kade O’Connell is a man of action and few words. He has me sputtering, overthinking, and consumed, making me think twice before I open my mouth.
“Let it out, Isla!”
I bend. I finally bend and let my own emotions pour through.
“I want my grief to stop. Thanksgiving is a day of family…and I’m not sure I have any left anymore.”
A vague truth.
