Page 44 of West End Earl
“What are you making?” He pushed off the doorway and closed the door behind him.
“I thought I’d try something different.” She held up the piece, with its open wings and sturdy little wood body. “Is everything settled with Nelson?” With the tip of her blade she followed a line down the wood, then tilted her head, examining it from the side.
“It’s beautiful. Why a bird?”
Phee shrugged a bit sheepishly. “Because I wanted to fly away.”
Cal reached out, and she handed the piece to him. Tracing the detailed wings, he said, “What about now? Do you still want to fly away?”
“Sometimes. Less so in the last few days. Don’t take it personally. I’ve been running a lot longer than I’ve been staying with you.”
“Or kissing me.” He said it casually, but she heard the underlying question as he returned the carving.
Phee nodded. “Kissing you changed things, yes. And if we share a bed at Lakeview, it will change things even more. We should probably talk about what comes next.”
Cal squatted in front of her chair and ran his long-fingered hands over her thighs in a casual caress that sent her blood humming. “I want a relationship, Phee. I hope you do too. You’re right. We should talk.”
She set aside the penknife and bird, then tucked an escaped piece of hair behind his ear. “How is this going to work, Cal? I’ve been to too many events as Adam to suddenly don a dress and fool everyone. And I can’t live openly as a woman until the end of the year—assuming I live that long. We’d be sneaking around for months if we take this beyond Lakeview.”
“You’ve been by my side nearly every day for two years. We’re friends, and I hope lovers. Let’s deal with issues as they come, working together like we always have.”
She kissed the corner of his mouth, where late-day bristles were rough under her lips. “Together, then. In every way. But it will be my first time, and I expect us to take measures to avoid pregnancy. I’m already on the run from a murderous uncle—we don’t need to add an unexpected baby and turn all this into a melodrama.”
He settled on his heels but kept his hands on her thighs. “With half siblings scattered throughout the country, and probably the Continent, I have always worried about pregnancy. So I appreciate you wanting to take measures.”
She bit her lip, and his gaze focused on her mouth. Talking about being in bed with him had her ready to strip down and dive under the covers. “I wish I wasn’t leaving. I wish we could climb in that bed over there and stay for days. I missed you last night.” She caressed the skin above his cravat and felt his rough swallow under her touch.
“We hadn’t spoken about sharing a bed, and when Kingston woke us, I realized I might have overstepped. And trust me, Phee, I wish you weren’t going anywhere.” Although his expression was hot, his hand was gentle as he traced a line from her cheekbone down to her mouth.
She blinked slowly, clearing some of the scrambling effect that look had on her. “Unless you hid everything from me, you haven’t taken a lover in a while. Why me? Why us?”
The look he gave her would have melted her petticoats had she been wearing any. As it was, her skin tingled within her breeches. “Because it’s you. Because you’re in my blood, and I don’t ever want you to leave. And because for the first time, I see my future sitting right in front of me.” He leaned back with a comical wince. “But there’s something we have to fix first.” Reaching into his pocket, Cal withdrew a small bottle.
The sound she made was somewhere between a coo and a gasp at the sight of the familiar label. The small bottle of sandalwood scent was an expense she’d agonized over until finally justifying it as a onetime indulgence. Phee turned her chin to the side so he could dab a little behind her ears. “Thank you. It’s a rather masculine scent, but I love it.”
Cal nuzzled her neck. “Masculine, feminine—doesn’t matter. It’s your scent. And that’s the important thing.” He sighed against her skin. “Now you smell right.”
“Come to my bed at Lakeview,” she breathed as he nibbled a line along her jaw.
“The second I arrive. I promise. But first we need to get you out of here and safe.”
Chapter Fourteen
Lakeview was a full day’s travel from London, but the day was nearly over. Phee and his servants would overnight at an inn along the way, then arrive the next day. Cal watched the traveling coach rumble down the street from his library window.
She’d asked the question that lingered in his mind as well. What kind of future did they have? Sure, they might continue as they’d began, once they’d dealt with the threat of her uncle. They could be “bachelor friends” who lived together as companions. They certainly wouldn’t be alone in that designation.
Kingston, thus far, had kept mute on the subject, but eventually another servant would find them embracing. Or they’d come across proof that Adam Hardwick was not what he seemed. No matter how much he paid his staff or how loyal they were, keeping Phee’s secret would be like holding water in their hands—eventually, something would leak out and make a mess.
All that assumed there would be a future. That Milton would be in custody or otherwise neutralized and she’d be safe. Everything else remained uncertain. Any version of a future between them came with questions. Big questions.
But he wanted her. Amidst all that unknown, that was something Cal knew down to his bones. Their turn toward romance deviated from every norm and broke every rule of proper discourse.
And he didn’t give a damn.
He, the one who spent so much of his time handling the scandals of others, minimizing the damage, was barreling forward with Phee, heedless of how things might look to outsiders.
This could easily explode in his face.
