Page 57 of Cara
She must have been so scared.
She was waiting for you… All this time, you left her there.
Revenge was more important.
You goddamn bastard, you fucked this. You’re the reason she’s gone, the reason she was alone.
My legs slacken, cries bellowing from my throat as I fold in on myself.
The sounds I produce are strange, unfamiliar. They arise from deep within, a place that should never be visited.
But I think I live there now.
With each passing second, what I couldn’t confront in Madrid or during the flight is here. The reality that her final moments were taken by someone who had no love for her, that even now I’ll never know what kind of pain they put her through.
By the time I turn off the water and step out of the shower, my body operates on autopilot. I throw on some clothes and enter the room, a hollowness in my chest.
On the nightstand, she’s there, tucked inside a book. I remember when my father handed me the picture, hoping to entice me about the idea of my future bride. He didn’t realize I needed no push to become her husband.
At that moment, she had someone else on her mind. Her smile was so bright because she envisioned a future beyond what our families had planned for her. It didn’t matter that her happiness was beyond what I could provide her.
I just wanted her to be happy.
I loved that smile.
My eyes burn as they roam from the book to the gun on the edge of the table. I stare at the weapon long enough to know I should walk away.
“X, don’t. Don’t youfuckingthink about it.”
Bo’s cautious tone isn’t enough to expel temptation. So easily, my world could go quiet.
It’s what I want. Truly.
To not feel.
A tear slides down the side of my nose onto my lips. “Vito. Where is he?”
“He’s heavily guarded but he’s still down south. They havemore men on him than usual. Probably because of all this… I saw that Strata was in Madrid.”
“Yes.” With what little will I have left, I tear my gaze from the pistol, finding my blood-stained coat on the ground. My fingers dig into the pocket until I feel the broken chain. Bo can see that Sophie’s wedding ring still hangs from my neck. His features wince as he notices the ring to match it in my grasp.
“I… I don’t know what to say.”
“There is nothing to say.”
“You did everything you could, man. Everything.”
My eyes sweep to his severely, bitterness icing my veins.
“X, you broke that woman out of hell. What you went through because of it?—”
I don’t want to talk. Not about this. Not about anything.
I want him to go. Everyone downstairs to go.
“It’s late.” My words ring out as a dismissal. “Thanks for being here, but you all can go now.”
Dante presses into the doorway, revealing himself, wiping tears from his eyes. Bo pats his brother’s back, reassuring him when he resists that it’s safe to leave me.
