Page 268 of Forbidden Billionaires: Vol. 5
Penny pulled her eyebrows together. “Are you feeling okay, Matt?”
“I’ll be feeling a lot better after tonight.”
She nodded. “I’m glad you liked the milkshake. We’re gonna leave now.” She gave me one last weird look, waved, and walked away.
Tanner burst out laughing.
I just stared at him.
“You thought I…” he laughed harder. “That she was going to…” He could barely catch his breath. “Tonight in a hotel…” He doubled over laughing.
Oh fuck.This was just one of his stupid pranks. Why did he always find it so funny to mess with me? Of course Penny wasn’t going to sleep with me tonight. For Christ’s sake, she had Scarlett with her.
“I got you so good,” Tanner finally said when he stopped laughing. “Pretty sure the only person getting laid tonight is James.” He slapped me on the back as he stood up to go. “You’re so gullible.”
“And you’re a terrible friend.”
“Terriblebestfriend, thank you very much. I’ll see you tomorrow night at My Favorite Bar.” He touched the side of his head like he was about to tip a hat. But he wasn’t wearing a hat. He shookhis head, looking momentarily confused, and then hurried out of the restaurant.
The waitress came over and handed me the bill. What the hell? He’d jilted me with the check again.
***
I walked up the steps of my brownstone on one of the quieter streets in the city. All my friends lived in swanky apartment buildings. The first apartment I’d bought was just like theirs. I’d hated that place. All the white walls and modern furniture and appliances. It was like there was no life in it. It made me feel claustrophobic. I’d sold it for a loss because I couldn’t bear to live another second in that empty hell hole.
When I was growing up, my favorite place to be at my house was the kitchen. It was warm and light and happy. I think I’d been chasing happiness my whole adult life. Even though I knew it wasn’t possible. So I bought a place that felt like a home.
But it still felt like I was suffocating. I unlocked the door, switched on the lights, and tossed my keys onto the little table in the entranceway. The place was a steal when I bought it. A complete fixer upper. There’d been a freaking hole in the ceiling of the dining room with no explanation. I’d been sold. And I’d been fixing it up in my spare time for the last several years. It was better when I kept busy.
But now I’d almost successfully fixed everything that needed fixing. The kitchen was brand new. The three bathrooms too. I’d sanded and refinished all the hardwood floors. I’d even managed to fix the leaky roof by myself without falling off the damned thing.
It was almost complete and I had no idea what to do next. This place wasn’t meant for a bachelor. Somewhere along the way in renovations, it had turned into more of a family home instead of a home for just me. I needed to call my real estate agent. As soon as possible. When I was living in a rundown brownstone, I was fine. But seeing the place fixed up made my chest ache. I wasn’t a family man. And I couldn’t be here anymore. I needed a one bedroom, one bathroom…something. Maybe something between a family home and a soulless apartment building. I just had no idea what that was.
I walked up the stairs, past my home office and a second bedroom I never went in, and down the hall to the master.
I turned on the shower and stared at the double sinks I’d put in. A his-and-hers sink? What the hell had I been thinking? This place was worse than the empty, lifeless apartment building I used to own. There was life here. A life I wasn’t going to have.
I pulled off my Empire High football t-shirt, kicked off the rest of my clothes and stepped under the steaming hot water.
And as soon as I closed my eyes under the stream of water, I saw Brooklyn’s face. I always saw her face when I closed my eyes. She was spread out naked, tangled in my sheets. The morning sun lighting up her face.
I tried to ignore the image of her as I soaped myself up. But I could feel myself getting hard just thinking about her.Fuck.I pressed my forehead against the cool tile. Yes, I saw Brooklyn when I closed my eyes. And whenever I thought of her, I either got angry, mopey, or…desperate to have her. I found it best to get her out of my system as quickly as possible, despite how I felt. When I was angry, I’d go for a run. When I was mopey, I stuffed that emotion down by focusing on work. And when I wished she was beneath me?
I wrapped my soapy hand around my cock, picturing her hand instead. No, her mouth. God, her perfect little mouth. Her looking up at me innocently. Because I was the only person she’d ever sucked off. I was her first and only everything.
Seeing how hard she made me used to get her off. The first time she spread her legs for me was because she knew how badly I needed her. I pictured that first time. In her skirt that was too short. In her blouse that was cut too deep, showing off the tops of her large breasts. I’d been doomed since the first time she’d walked into Empire High. She’s been mine before we ever spoke. And we both knew it.
I stroked myself faster, picturing her here with me in the shower. Her back pressed against the tile. Her tits against my chest. Her screaming my name.
I should have tried to think about anyone I’d fucked over the past few months instead. The girl from the café down the street. Or the random woman stalking me at my games.
But all I saw was Brooklyn. Her legs wrapped around my waist. Her fingers buried in my hair. Her trying to stifle her moans so we wouldn’t be caught.
Fuck.Stream after stream of my cum landed on the tile floor. My breath was ragged as my hand stopped. I didn’t want to open my eyes. I didn’t want to leave the image of her alone in the shower. I didn’t want her to disappear.
That was the other thing about thinking about her when I was hard. As soon as I wasn’t, the mopey shit started. My arousal gave way to guilt. If I’d protected her, she’d still be here. I could still touch her. Hold her. Kiss her.
I was sick. I was lusting over a ghost. I pictured her when I was alone. I pictured her face when I closed my eyes with other women. I saw her everywhere.
