Page 361 of Forbidden Billionaires: Vol. 5
“I don’t want to do any of those things,” I said.
“But it’s forbidden chocolate.”
“I don’t like forbidden chocolate.”
She looked at me instead of turning on the TV. “Right, you don’t.” She scrunched her mouth to the side like she was trying to remember what I’d liked in high school.
But I wasn’t talking about ice cream right now.
“What flavor do you prefer?”
My gaze dropped to her lips. “You.” The word just tumbled out of me. I couldn’t lie to her about why I was here. It wasn’t for food or a movie. It was to be with her. She was the only person who understood what I’d been through. And she’d just admitted it. She was as broken as me. And in some weird, twisted way, it felt like she’d been waiting all this time for me. Cupcake had been her last serious relationship. She’d never been mine back then. But we were tied together. We were both stuck. Why not be stuck together?
“I’m not an ice cream flavor,” she said, her voice barely a whisper.
I moved slowly, worried she’d shove me away. But somehow moving slowly toward her, over top of her, just made the heat even more palpable. It was like my whole body was on fire. And not in an Ash accident kind of way. I was hovering over her, my lips a fraction of an inch away from hers, when she broke the silence.
“You’ll regret kissing me in the morning.”
“Who said I was going to kiss you?”
She laughed. “Matt…”
I grabbed the side of her face. “Fine. Yeah, I’m going to kiss you.”
There were tears in her eyes now. “You can’t, Matt. We need to pick a movie and eat ice cream before it melts.” But she didn’t push me away.
I dropped my forehead to hers. “I just need to know if you feel this too.”
The sound of her light breathing was speeding up. “Matt, you’re drunk.”
“I’m not that drunk.” I pulled back ever so slightly and traced my thumb along one of her tears. “Why are you crying?”
“Because I’m not her.” Kennedy’s voice cracked. “I’ll never be her.”
“You’re real. You’re here. I can touch you.” I let my hand wander down the side of her neck. “I can taste you.” I felt tears formingin my eyes too. “I’m so sick of chasing a ghost, Kennedy. I don’t want to be stuck anymore. I want you.”
“But you still love her.”
I nodded. I knew what she was getting at. And maybe she was right. But what if she was wrong? “I don’t know if I can ever love someone else.”Why the hell did I say that?!
“Matt.” Her tears fell freely from her eyes now, cascading down her chin.
It felt like I was crying too. But I didn’t think I was. It was like I could feel her tears. Like they were somehow mine. “I’m not okay, Kennedy. I’m really fucking not okay.”
She didn’t say anything.
“But I feel less shitty when I’m with you.”
“I know.” She reached up and ran her fingers gently through my hair. “I feel a lot less shitty when you’re here too. But there’s a 50-50 chance you won’t remember any of this in the morning.”
There was no fucking way I wouldn’t remember kissing this girl.
“And I don’t gamble with my heart anymore,” she added. “I can’t.”
Is that what I was asking her to do?Fuck.It was. I was asking her to take a chance when I just told her I wasn’t sure if I could ever love someone else. And just like that, it wasn’t as easy to breathe again.
“Can we maybe just…” her voice trailed off. “Can we just watch the movie? And if you remember any of this in the morning, maybe we can talk about this more then?”
