Page 31 of The Last One You Loved
“Okey-dokey, I’ll just wait here.”
I stared at the little bundle of energy as she hopped from foot to foot and then went in, shutting the door behind me and locking it because I wasn’t entirely sure she wouldn’t burst inside. I used the toilet and washed my hands before my image in the mirror caught my gaze. I was a wreck. My hair was tangled, and the dark circles I was unable to escape were even more pronounced.
I slipped the hair tie from my wrist where it lived semi-permanently and pulled my blonde waves up into a messy bun. Then, I made quick work of brushing my teeth. I’d much rather the Hatleys see me after I’d had time to shower, put on some makeup and actual clothes, but I knew I didn’t have that kind of time.
Proving me right, a knock on the door was followed by Mila’s tiny voice, “How long has it been, Miss McKenna? Will we have missed the craps already?”
I chuckled, and the smile reflecting back at me in the mirror surprised me so much I dropped my toothbrush. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d seen myself smile—a real smile, not the doctor smile I pasted on.
I opened the door to see she had a worried frown between her brows again.
“Phew. I thought maybe you weren’t ever going to come out, Miss McKenna.”
“It’s just McKenna,” I repeated, and she nodded, picking up my hand and towing me toward the door.
I barely had time to slide into a pair of Crocs that I practically lived in at the hospital before heading out into the chilly November air. Scratch that, not just chilly, downright cold. I shivered, looking out at the mist that had settled down low over the frost-covered fields beyond the barn. The sun hadn’t cleared the horizon yet, barely tinting the sky pink, but clouds were hanging above us, indicating a storm would be hitting soon. I wanted to stop and drink it in?the quiet of the early day and the scenes from my childhood where I’d felt safest?but Mila kept a tight grip on my hand as she directed me toward the farmhouse.
As she skipped beside me, I had a chance to take in the new addition. It had old oak doors, stained-glass windows, stage-coach-type lanterns, and red brick swarming with ivy. It was graceful and elegant while still blending in with the ranch somehow. The sign above the door readSweet Willow Restaurant, but on the glass, it said,Closed until April. Maddox had said something the night before about the ranch being closed for the season, and I guessed that applied to the restaurant as well.
As we got closer to the farmhouse, I fought waves of dread and anticipation. I wasn’t sure what waited for me inside. Would Maddox be there with his family? His little girl was there. She’d clearly spent the night. Did that mean he’d left her and gone back to his partner? Maybe they’d had a date night and lost themselves in each other without their little girl hovering around them. The knots inside me grew.
“Do you know how to skip?” Mila’s voice brought me back to her. “I love, love, love to skip, and Daddy says I’m going to be a world champion skipper someday.”
We’d reached the wraparound porch and the back door, and it was Eva Hatley’s voice that answered Mila instead of mine. “Skipping is pure joy, Bug-a-Boo. But maybe you can take it down a notch so you don’t burst our guest’s eardrums.”
My heart squeezed tighter as my eyes met Eva’s. She’d called me a guest and had a smile on her face as she took me in that made those damn tears threaten to leak out again. Made me want to rush into her arms, spill all my worries, and tell her how much I’d missed her.
Mila dropped my hand and ran past her grandmother into the house as I mounted the steps. Without another word, Eva moved forward and wrapped me in a hug. As hard as I tried, I couldn’t help my normal reaction that had me stiffening in her arms, but she didn’t seem to care. She just hugged me tighter while I kept my arms at my sides, hands balled into fists. I bit my cheek, refusing to shed tears that never changed anything.
When Eva let go, her hand went to my face as she assessed me with blue eyes just like Maddox’s. Ones that saw more of me than anyone, except her son, had ever been able to see. Her brown hair was woven with gray, and her face was lined with a few more wrinkles, but she still exuded an air of energy and liveliness that matched all of her children’s.
“You look like shit,” she said, and the tension in me eased with a laugh that burst from me.
“Tell me how you really feel, Eva,” I said, and this caused her smile to dim.
“Not now, but if you stick around, you know I probably will.”
My throat squeezed tight because, in those words, I could hear the hurt she felt and the reproach. She’d taken me in, made me part of her family, and I’d abandoned them all for my dreams, thinking I couldn’t keep them without keeping the nightmares of my youth as well. I’d given it all up because I didn’t know how to keep only the good parts without wanting to run back to them.
She stepped away and opened the door. “Come on, let’s get you fed. It looks like you haven’t eaten in a month.”
I followed her and continued to be astounded by the changes that had been wrought in my absence. If I’d thought Willow Creek had been lost in aRip Van Winkletime warp, the ranch was the opposite—so much change it was hard to keep up. The kitchen was enormous now instead of the cozy offshoot it once had been. Multiple commercial stoves, ovens, and refrigerators were mixed in with huge quartz counters that went on forever. The cabinets were white on the top and gray on the bottom with elegantly lighted glass displays.
Tucked off to the side in a smaller space was a large oak table I remembered eating and playing cards at more times than I could count. Mila had taken a seat there next to a woman who I thought must be Gemma. She had the blonde hair and hazel eyes that had once made me feel like maybe I fit in here, but she’d also changed so much that it was hard to believe she was the awkward teen I’d left behind when she was only thirteen. She smiled at me, and it was her brother’s smile, so it stabbed at my heart.
“Hi, McKenna. It’s really good to see you,” Gemma said. I wondered how they could all be so nice when I’d done nothing to deserve their kindness. I’d left, ignored them, and never come back.
“Hey, Gemma,” I returned, feeling suddenly awkward.
“You ready for some berry craps?” Gemma asked, winking toward Mila.
It made my lips twitch again. “I have to say, it was a bit confusing.”
Eva laughed and waved me toward a chair. The plates of crepes lined up at each place setting looked like they were from a five-star restaurant, perfectly formed, decorated, and garnished. Eva had always loved to cook, experimenting with new things, and it made me wonder what the restaurant’s menu looked like when it was open.
“Coffee or tea?” Eva asked as I sat down.
“Coffee would be great if you have some made, but please don’t go out of your way. I certainly didn’t expect to be asked to breakfast,” I said.
