Page 96 of The Last Dance You Saved
“What do you want me to say, Sadie? Our lives were always a million miles apart in more than just physical distance. This isn’t going to work, and I won’t be responsible for dragging you into my screwed-up life. If I had a choice, I’d separate myself from Fallon too, but she’ll always be a target as my daughter. I have to keep her close to ensure she’s protected, but I’ll be damned if Ichooseto bring someone else into it. Not when it’s easy enough to keep you out of it.”
God, did that hurt—the idea of being easy enough to toss away. I knew he didn’t really mean it. I knew he’d meant the I love you. But still, my heart throbbed.
“I see. And what if I don’t agree? What if I see a million ways our lives are impossibly twined now? What if I know, deep in my heart, just as you do, that we’re supposed to be together? That this is where I’m supposed to be?”
He scoffed. “I don’t have the time or effort to spend on protecting someone other than Fallon. You don’t belong here. You have a family and a business that needs you in Tennessee.”
“I have a man I love who needs me more!”
His eyes barely flickered as he kept every emotion pushed behind the same wall I’d first encountered a week ago. “I don’tneedyou. I may want you. May hunger for you. But I don’t need you.”
It was another slap to my face. A slap that stung more than if he’d actually hit me.
“You just told me you loved me! People who love each other need each other!”
“I was wrong,” he said as coldly and cruelly as possible.
Even though I knew why he was doing it, even though I knew the words weren’t true, they still wounded me. It tore me apart to do it, but I dragged my body from his, putting the physical distance between us he’d wanted for hours now.
I inhaled, trying to calm myself down, trying to calm him down. “Look, I understand why you’re upset—”
“Upset doesn’t even begin to describe what I’m feeling.”
We’d done this dance before. It felt like everything we’d done was some big circle, repeating until we finally got it right. And this wasn’t right.
“Okay, fine. You’re furious. You want to kill someone with your own hands. But don’t you get it? I feel the same damn way! I love you! I don’t want you suffering like this, taking the blame for things outside your control. And I definitely don’t want you sending me away because you think it’s the only way to protect me.”
“I’m not arguing with you about this. You’re going. Whether you take Fallon or not, this is where it ends for us. Right here. Tonight.”
I stepped closer and was surprised when he took a step back. It trapped him against the door, and I took advantage of it, putting my hands on either side of him, a mirror of how he’d trapped me this morning in the safe. “No.”
His nostrils flared, gaze settling on my mouth for two beats, and his throat bobbed. When his hands settled on my waist, I thought maybe I’d won. That maybe I’d gotten through to him by just reminding him of the neurons flaring between us whenever we stood this close. Instead, he lifted me with ease and placed me aside, opening the door, and stepping out into the hallway. I followed him, but he placed a palm to my chest, shoving me back into the room.
“I know it’s too much to ask after I’ve just told you we’re done, but I need an answer. Will you take Fallon for a few days?” I wondered how I’d ever seen the cold reserve he’d had in the booth that first night as the real Rafe. Now, all I could see was the passionate man who came alive with a barely lit match. The man who was hiding behind the ice. All I needed to do was melt it in order to reach him.
But I also knew the Rafe in front of me wasn’t just holding that wall up because he was unwilling to bend. He needed that icy front so he wouldn’t fall apart. So he could do the things he needed to do for his family. Fine, I’d let him have it for tonight. I’d let him hold it for the few days we were apart. But he had to come get his daughter, and when he did, I’d be ready. I’d have an entirely rational plan assembled on how and why we worked and all the reasons we belonged together.
He didn’t know how determined I could be when I wanted something.
And I wanted him.
“Of course I’ll take Fallon. She’ll always be welcome with me.”
“Thank you.” It was guttural and torn, just as I knew his insides were at this moment. He shifted, removing the hand from my chest, briefly stroking my cheek with a finger before spinning on his heel and heading down the hall without another word.
I shut the door with a shaky hand. Emotions flooded me, threatening tears, but I didn’t let them fall because they were unnecessary. We weren’t done. We weren’t over. He’d see. He may be accustomed to family letting him walk away, but he’d learn Hatleys didn’t give up on the people they loved. He was mine. I was his. The rest of the noise buzzing around us was just that. White noise. Useless and irrelevant.
? ? ?
It was Parker who knocked on my door the next morning just as I’d finished packing and not Rafe. When we made our way downstairs, Fallon and Lauren were hugging each other in the entryway. When I asked, they told me Rafe had already said goodbye to his daughter and then joined the sheriff’s team following the trail of blood the dead man had left behind him.
I wasn’t surprised, but it still stung. I wanted to send him a scathing text saying it was both cowardly and revealing that he’d avoided me. But I was saving up all my arguments for the big battle to come. The one that really mattered. The ever after I wasn’t letting him walk away from.
Parker grabbed my bags before I could protest, heading out to the SUV where Noah waited behind the wheel. Fallon’s face was all stubborn annoyance as she whirled away from her mother and followed him into the parking lot.
Lauren shocked me by holding me back and giving me a brief hug. “I know I said it last night, Sadie, but thank you.” She wiped tears from her cheeks. “For opening our eyes and for bringing us back to life.” Her gaze traveled over to her daughter, climbing into the back seat of the SUV. “It’s strange how certain I am that she’ll be safe with you. How I know you’ll defend her with your life, just like Rafe or I would or Spence would have.” She turned back to me. “In some ways, I think she’ll be better off with you than she’s been with me for the last year.”
The tears that had pricked my eyes when Rafe left my room last night returned.
