Page 74 of Summer Escape
I braced my hands on either side of her body, dropping my mouth to hers. She had to be feeling the same things I was. There was no way she hadn't fallen for me again, if she'd ever stopped at all. I couldn't be in this alone.
The thought was inconceivable.
Her hand touched my cheek, her fingers gentle. The tenderness almost sent me over. Her lips softened under mine.
I rolled us so that she was on top, her body moving over me as she looked down at me with so much affection.
I reached up to cup her breasts, my thumbs ghosting over her nipples. She moved faster, chasing her release, and I reveled in the familiar tingle at the base of my spine. I was close and didn't want to go over before her, so I lowered one hand to her clit, pressing hard.
She cried out as she slumped over me, her body spasming. I drove into her from underneath, finally letting go.
She rested her body over mine, and I held her tight. I never wanted to pull out or leave. Eventually, I shifted, going to the bathroom to clean up. I wet a washcloth with warm water and returned to my bedroom to carefully clean her.
Her breathing was even. She was asleep.
There wouldn't be any talk tonight of what this meant or how either of us felt. I let out a sigh as I tossed the washcloth into my laundry bin.
I was too worked up to rest, so I got up and pulled on a pair of basketball shorts, then opened the slider to the deck. I sat in the cushioned chair, watching the moon and listening to the waves crash against the shore.
I tried not to think about how I would soon be alone in this house. I wouldn't have anyone to share my life with. I'd have my family, but it wasn't the same as my child or Saylor. Over the last few weeks, we'd become a unit.
Soon, I'd sit here wondering if they'd moved on or forgotten about me. The thought hurt despite my vow to tamp down my emotions.
But I couldn't seem to relax. I was amped up and worried about what would happen.
Would Hayden fall into her family, remembering how much she loved living with her mother and her siblings? Would she forget about this summer and the bond we'd forged?
Would she eventually throw away the numerous letters we'd sent over the years when I was deployed, thinking they weren't worth keeping?
My mind kept running through the possible scenarios, each one bleaker than the last. I couldn't believe how far I'd come with Saylor and Hayden in such a short time. I didn’t think this was possible at the beginning of the summer, but I wanted so much more. But everything was out of my control.
I'd done everything I could have done. There was that nagging voice that urged me to tell her how I felt. But I wouldn't manipulate her into staying on the island. It had to be her choice. Satisfied, I finally got up and went into my bedroom, climbing under the sheets.
Saylor moved toward me. "Is everything okay?"
I kissed her head. "Perfect."
She sighed and snuggled against my chest, quickly falling back to sleep. In this moment, everything was perfect. It was the future I was concerned about. The one that stretched out in front of me.
I was destined to be a memory, a quick stop in their journey. I wasn't the end game for anyone. They had more important people in their lives, and it was my fault for removing myself from theirs years ago.
This was my penance. I'd made a choice to join the military, and I'd have to suffer the consequences of strained relationships and a lonely life.
Saylor had to choose me. I wouldn't settle for anything less. I just hoped I wasn't making a huge mistake.
Chapter Twenty
Saylor
I'd never felt closer to Marshall but, at the same time, further away. We'd shared something special the night of the party. Every day since, though, felt like Marshall was pulling away, preparing for me and Hayden to leave.
I wondered if it was a byproduct of his deployments. He kept his distance to protect himself. I could see that he was only hurting himself, but I couldn't figure out how to broach the subject.
I didn't have a right to demand anything of him. It worked out that I was leaving the same day as Hayden. I figured it would be easier to go when he was on the road with her.
I was dreading it, but at the same time, it felt like our time had already come to an end. The little world we'd created here was already over.
Hayden's volunteer work at the center had slowed down. Her new friends were already starting sports in preparation for the fall season. And Hayden was ready to return to her mother's home and reconnect with her school friends.
