Page 68 of Traitorous Lies
November 11th
6:49 P.M.
Everything was so wrong, Jax wanted to scream.
Ever since she came back inside from wherever she’d run off to earlier, Monique had been nothing but a shell of the sweet woman he’d been getting to know.
Now she was so polite it hurt. Her face was completely blank, her smile brittle. She responded to every question or comment posed to her, but there was no life to anything she did.
She was like a shell going through the motions.
What made it even worse were the dirty looks his brothers and their girlfriends kept shooting him. The Delta Team guys, too. If looks could kill, he’d be dead a hundred times over already.
This was killing him. A few careless words, and he’d ruined the best thing to ever happen to him. It wasn't what he’d meant, those words he’d spoken to her, none of them were true, or how he saw her. It was nothing more than his fear talking, and his frustration at the whole situation.
How did he manage to keep messing this up?
Monique was a surprise, the last thing he’d expected to find when he went to that charity gala, but she was also more than he could ever have hoped for. Looking for a girlfriend hadn't even been on his mind, not even after all five of his brothers falling in love in the previous few months. Yet from that very first second that his gaze connected with Monique’s, he was hooked. He knew how lucky he was that she’d given him this second chance, and he’d managed to mess it up in twenty-four hours.
As badly as he wanted to make things right, he couldn’t if Monique wouldn't give him a chance.
Not that he deserved one, he got that, but it didn't stop him from wanting one.
Desperately.
More than he’d ever wanted something in his life.
Adding scoops of ice cream to all the plates of brownies he’d just prepared, he drizzled caramel sauce on top of each and then grabbed the biggest one. This was Monique’s favorite dessert, he remembered her telling him that in one of their talks while they were walking in the forest in France, and while it wasn't like he expected brownies and ice cream to soften her toward him, he at least wanted to show in little ways that he was invested in her. In them.
“I made dessert,” he announced as he walked back into the large dining room where they’d all eaten dinner together.
Monique was the only one who didn't look over at him.
She just sat there in her chair, staring blankly into space. There wasn't a spark of life left in her pretty gray eyes, it was like she just wasn't in there anymore. Everything that made Monique Monique seemed to have vanished.
His words had done that.
While he didn't have many memories left of his mom, he’d only been four when she died, one memory he did have was her telling him and Jake to always be careful with their words. Words could hurt someone more than any weapon, they were the most dangerous thing in the world.
As a child, he’d never gotten that, at least not really, but now for the first time his mother’s warning was sinking in with undeniable clarity.
Words hurt.
Words were dangerous.
If you wielded them in the heat of the moment, you could cause damage you never foresaw.
“Is that ice cream, Uncle Jax?” Essie piped up.
“Yes, it is, messy Essie,” he replied, still standing beside Monique’s chair, the dessert held out between them like a peace offering. It wasn't much, but he wanted her to know that he really did see her, even if his careless words earlier suggested otherwise. He’d listened to all the things she told him, even the little things.
“Yay! Ice cream is my favorite dessert,” Essie cheered.
“These ones have hot brownies with them, and some caramel sauce on top, they’re Monique’s favorite.”
If he was hoping to get some sort of reaction out of her, he was mistaken.
Monique didn't move at all.
