Page 46 of Rejected Nanny Mate
I sat down on the opposite side of the living room, as far away from everyone as I could get. Mia looked up at me with those piercing blue eyes again, and I tried to give her a reassuring smile. There was nothing more to say, but Mia seemed to want to thank me over and over. I took the baby backand settled her into her crib after a while. When I returned, I heard Mia and Joe talking quietly in the living room. I paused in the hallway, out of sight, and listened.
“Joe,” she was saying. “I don't want to impose, but would you mind if I stayed for a while? At least until I'm strong enough to travel again.”
“Of course not,” Joe said. “I'll go get one of the guest rooms set up for you, okay?”
“Thank you so much. You have no idea how grateful I am. And that woman...Gwen. She's lovely, isn't she?”
“She is,” Joe replied, his voice soft. “She's taken good care of Rose.”
“That's wonderful to hear.” Then she passed. “Are the two of you...?”
Joe took longer to respond than I expected, but when he spoke, he said exactly what I had expected him to. “She's Rose's nanny.”
They obviously had a lot more to talk about, so I swallowed past the lump in my throat and went back to my room, but before I got there, I paused in front of the nursery room door. It might have been my last night in Joe's house, and, therefore, the last chance I'd get to see my sweet Rosie sleeping.
I pushed her door open as silently as possible, and she was already passed out again, hands in fists stretched out above her head. Blinking back tears, I stroked a finger down one round cheek, marveling at how peaceful and happy she looked. I wanted to think that I'd been able to make her feel safe here, even if it wasn't forever.
It's better this way, I reminded myself, forcing back the sadness that was threatening to overtake me. If Rose's motherwere here, she wouldn't need me anymore. I couldn't be a second mom to Rose, and I would have to leave. But even though it felt like my heart was being ripped out, I knew it was for the best. The baby needed her mother, and I was just a substitute. A fill-in.
There was no way that Mia would let me stay here after the way things had happened between Joe and me. What if she wanted to rekindle whatever relationship she and Joe had had? Even if it was just a one-night stand in the beginning, the three of them could be an actual family now.
With a sigh, I closed the door and returned to my room, climbing into bed. I didn't want to leave, and it was hard to imagine what it would be like to return to Samson's pack. I hadn't realized just how much I'd grown to love living here, and how happy I'd become, even with the magic surges.
I tossed and turned most of the night, and when morning came, I felt more exhausted than ever. After showering and dressing, I walked out of my room and almost ran right into Joe, who was coming out of his. He reached out and steadied me, then immediately took a step back once I was on my feet. I blinked, surprised at how much I missed the touch of his hand against mine.
“Sorry,” he said quickly. “I'm still half asleep. Are you okay?”
“I'm fine,” I said. I was about to ask him if he wanted me to make coffee, but before I could say anything else, Mia opened the door of one of the guest rooms. She was wearing a pair of Joe's sweatpants and a t-shirt that was several sizes too big for her. She'd pulled her hair into a ponytail, and she looked a lot younger than she had last night. I felt a pang of jealousy at how cute she looked and how good she seemed to fit in at Joe's place.
“Morning.” I told her briefly before turning back to Joe, “Can we talk here in a minute?” I wanted to tell him I wanted us to be alone, but Joe knew me well enough to read between the lines. He nodded once.
“Let me brush my teeth, and I'll meet you out on the patio, okay?”
“Sounds good.”
He gave me a quick smile and disappeared into his room, and I took a deep breath before heading outside, the cold air biting through my shirt. I popped back inside long enough to grab one of Joe's old flannels that he had hanging up, and pulled it tightly around myself as I waited for him in the anemic morning light.
When Joe finally came outside, I'd been staring off into the trees for so long that the chill had sunk all the way into my bones. He wrapped an arm around me and tugged me closer to him, and I let myself lean into his warmth for just a moment, trying to memorize the feeling.
“Sorry, I'm late,” he said. “I showed Mia where everything in the kitchen was, and she's feeding Rose breakfast.”
“Don't worry about it.”
He stepped back from me, and I immediately missed his warmth. But he put his hands in his pockets, and I knew he was trying to distance himself. There wasn't much space between us, but it felt like an ocean. I wondered if he felt the same way.
“So,” I started, my voice low. “What do we do now?”
Joe sighed, running a hand through his dark hair. “Hell if I know. This is...unexpected. But I'd been trying to find Rose's mother ever since she showed up, so I guess it's a win.”
“Are you worried about her pack retaliating?”
Joe huffed a laugh, his warm breath fogging the air. “Hell no. Even without the alliance, my pack is twice the size of her old one. With the alliance...it'd be a death wish to try and retaliate.”
That made me feel a little better about Rose's safety, at least. “That's good.” I looked down at my feet and rubbed my hand over my chest where it threatened to grow tight. “Look, Joe...thank you for everything. Really. But now that you have Mia, you don't need me anymore. I'll call Samson and let him know I'm coming back to the pack, and you three can...I don't know. Adjust. Figure things out as mom, dad, and baby.”
“Gwen...” Joe reached out to take my hand, and I let him, even though I knew I should pull away. His touch felt like fire, and it brought back memories of all the other times that we'd been this close. He cleared his throat. “It doesn't have to be like that. Mia's grateful for what you did for Rose, and so am I. I know I've said it before, but you really helped us out of a bind.”
“I'm glad,” I said honestly. “But if she’s here, you don’t need me.”
