Page 98 of I'm Looking for a Man in Finance
I could feel James’s gaze on my face. Knowing how supportive he was of me was comforting. When he’d originally asked about this very topic after my clear frustration over Anthea not coming through on our agreement, he’d been nothing but encouraging. I’d almost taken the leap when I’d broached the topic with Roxie a few weeks ago, but when she’d put a pause in the conversation, I’d shifted my priorities back toSophisticate. This felt like whiplash.
“Things are turning around at work. My review of The Social Eatery is doing well. Anthea really liked it. I have one more week of the ‘Love on Wall Street’ series and then I’ve fulfilled my end of the agreement with Anthea.” James shifted uncomfortably at the mention of our fifth and final agreed upon date. I’d basically forgotten that our time together could end soon. Not after the turn of events that were these past few weeks.
“Do you want to see what shakes out there?” Roxie asked, unbothered that I was the one now turning down the opportunity to work together. That was why I loved her. There were rarely hard feelings between us.
But as the three of us continued to eat our lunch, I had a nagging feeling in the back of my mind that wondered if turning down the opportunity for artistic freedom and working with my best friend was the right move. Because what would happen if Anthea went back on another arrangement in the future? What if she promised me something that would change my career forever and then go back on it?
Despite those risks, I knew I had to see this through withSophisticate. I had to do this for the little girl that usedto cut out articles and pictures from her magazines and hang them on her walls. When there were moments when I wished I had an older sister and didn’t always have to be the oldest sister,Sophisticatewas there.
I couldn’t just walk out on my younger self. I had to give it my best shot in the big city for the sake of the small-town girl I used to be.
34
James
“James, my sweet boy!” Nonna opened the front door, her apron wrapped around her waist and wooden spoon in hand. “That article your girlfriend wrote was magnificent. I asked your grandfather if we could go to The Social Eatery—once the crowd dies down, of course. That place has been packed every night.”
I opened my mouth to correct my grandmother and tell her that Hallie wasn’t technically my girlfriend. Not officially, anyway. But the words didn’t come.
Because the truth was … she sort ofwas.
I had told my family we were dating because somewhere along the way, the lines blurred. We weren’t just pretending anymore. We’d spent nearly every weekend together, texted constantly, shared meals, laughter, late-night talks. We’d fallen into something real without ever saying the words.
So I let Nonna call her my girlfriend.
Because if I was being honest with myself … I wanted her to be.
“Hi, Nonna,” I greeted her with a kiss on the cheek. “I can see if I can get the two of you reservations. I think Sebastian knows the owner.”
Hallie’s review for The Social Eatery had gone out onSunday morning and was making its rounds. A few smaller media publications had picked up her article, drawing more attention to it than justSophisticate’s audience.
“Where is Sebastian?” Nonna asked. “I thought he was coming tonight.”
“He’s on his way. He texted me on my way over here that he was a little behind leaving the office.”
Nonna waved her wooden spoon in my direction. I kept my distance from her. I still remembered getting whacked on the backside with one as a kid. “You boys are wasting your lives away in those steel prisons.”
“We’re working, Nonna,” I defended as I followed her into the house, where the same scene was always laid out for every family dinner. My uncle, father, cousin, and grandfather were playing poker. While my mother and aunt were in the kitchen. “We are doing exactly what you and Nonno did with the restaurant.”
“But you are selling your souls to companies that do not care about you. They would toss you to the wolves given the chance.” Nonna waved a dismissive hand in my direction before she returned to the kitchen to finish dinner.
I had to admit that she had a point. There were few companies out there that would sacrifice profits or padding their investors’ pockets if it meant giving their employees a better experience. Berkley Williams was no better. They had perpetuated the idea that their employees couldn’t have much of a life outside of work, or else they’d miss an opportunity for the investment portfolios that they oversaw. The CEO of Berkley Williams had gotten a large raise year after year, while the board continued to profitoff the company’s stocks. What else would you expect from a board for an investment company?
But there was one company that was making waves in recent weeks as it strayed from the status quo—Rooster. When I had told Hallie that I hadn’t thought about Theo’s offer that much since our conversation on Friday, I’d lied, and I had no idea why. Perhaps discussing my goals made me realize I was delaying my dream. Working for Rooster’s new venture capital firm was nearly all I thought about during work hours.
With things working out in my personal life, maybe it was time to focus on other parts of my life. I’d even received a surprising email from Theo this morning asking if I’d thought anymore about our conversation at The Nest on Friday. I hadn’t responded yet, but I knew a guy like Theo wouldn’t wait around for very long.
“Hi, honey.” My mother walked over to give me a hug and I leaned down to give her a kiss on the cheek. The minute she pulled away, I knew I’d somehow messed up. “Why didn’t you bring Hallie tonight?”
Now I understood the look of disapproval she’d given me when I’d first walked through the door alone. My mother and Hallie had gotten on like two peas in a pod at dinner on Friday night. By the end of the night, my mother had nearly extracted Hallie’s entire life story from her. She asked about her parents, her sister, her soon-to-be niece. I couldn’t even remember if she’d ever bothered to ask Cassidy what her parents’ names were. Yet there she was asking Hallie when her parents were next coming to the city because she’d like to meet them.
“She was busy tonight.”
Which might not have been a lie necessarily. Hallie could have been busy. I hadn’t wanted to ask her to come tonight after forcing her through a family dinner only a few days ago. Although I wanted to spend every evening with her, I worried I was moving too fast.
I had no one to blame but myself. I’d chickened out of making things official with her. When Saturday morning rolled around, I told myself I’d tell her at lunch the minute she kissed me awake. Then, when lunch came and went, and we remained preoccupied, I promised myself I’d tell her during dinner. But she left before I ever found the courage.
Which meant I was showing up to family dinner without a girlfriend, despite my family’s differing opinion.
