Page 44 of When We Fall: Part One
I shook my head and backed away, but Cole grabbed my arm and dragged me to the kitchen.
“E, man, what the hell is going on with you? We’ve barely seen you these last few weeks. If you aren’t holed up in the basement, you’re in classes. What’s the deal?” Cole leveled his blue eyes on me.
I raked my fingers through my hair and sighed. “Just working, man.”
“OK. I work, too. Killed a guy two nights ago. I still come home and fuck my girl. When was the last time you got your dick wet?”
“You’re so vulgar,” I muttered, looking away from him.
He gripped my face and forced me to look at him.
“E, I’m serious. What’s going on with you?”
I pulled away from his hold and sighed. “Depression is a bitch, I guess.”
Cole studied me for a moment before glancing to the doorway and back again.
“How can we fix it?”
“We can’t. Unless you can go back in time and change the past, I’d say I’m fucked.” I made to move past him, but he stopped me by putting his hand in the center of my chest.
“A year ago, you almost died for the woman you love. You fought to be here, E. Don’t fucking fight to leave.”
I swallowed hard at his words. “I don’t want to leave. I feel so worthless. I told her shit about my past. It makes me feel so…” My voice trailed off.
“Makes you feel what?” he pressed.
“Disgusting. Broken. Fucked up. Pick an adjective,” I muttered.
“Rosalie doesn’t see you that way, you prick. She loves you because you’re you. I wish you could see yourself the way we see you. We love you, E. You gotta stop this shit. What can I do to help? Huh? I’ll do it.”
I stared down at my feet. “I don’t know. I guess I’m afraid she’ll be disgusted by me. Then she’ll just go. Even if she swears she won’t leave, I worry about it.”
“Think of it this way. If the roles were reversed and she were the one who had been harmed, would you leave her? Huh? Would you walk out and be disgusted by her?”
“No,” I snarled, the thought of that night with Ian entering my mind. “I’d kill the motherfucker who hurt her. I’d tear this world apart until I found him, and then I’d rip him to shreds.”
Cole raised his brows at me. “Would you still love her?”
“Of course, I’d still love her. She’s my entire fucking world.”
He gave me a sad smile. “Honestly, man. You’re making it seem like she’s just a nice vacation spot and not the place you want to live.”
I dampened my lips at his words, them hitting home hard. He was right. By trying not to fuck shit up, I was fucking shit up. Like always.
“What do I do?” I whispered.
“You either go in there and fuck her with us, or you go back to the basement and mope around. What’s it going to be?”
I looked to the doorway again. I could hear Rosalie’s soft moans as Enzo fucked her.
“I’m going home,” I said softly, peeling my shirt off and letting it fall to the floor.
“Fuck yeah. Come on. Fox is doing some football shit today. He’s one less dick to contend with.”
I shook my head at that and followed Cole back to the living room. He’d lost his clothes along the way, which only made me chuckle softly. He was always up for anything.
I lurked near the edge of the couch as Cole strode forward and pushed his dick against Rosalie’s lips. She parted for him and sucked him down. He let out a soft groan, and his head fell back while she continued riding Enzo.
