Page 11 of Ambrosia Kisses
"Maybe all of the above," I snap, planting my hands against his hard stomach to shove him out of the way since he won't move on his own. "Wouldn't you like to know who I'm fucking? I'll tell you a little secret. It's not you."
In reality, it's no one. I've never been able to move past him. And believe me, that's pissed me off plenty over the years. I was nothing to him, but he still had too much of my heart. And with everything else…well, I was a little too broken to even try getting over him.
He growls, an unholy, dangerous sound. Instead of me moving him, he moves me. His hands lash around my wrists, yanking me up against him. Before I can even draw breath to tell him not to touch me, he's hauling me off the path toward a storage shed.
"Let me go right now!" I yank against his hold hard enough to send us both stumbling into the side of it. We land with his back against the metal, and my tits crushed to his chest.
Electricity races through my veins, sparking everywhere his body presses to mine.
His breath rasps in my ear as he locks his arms around my waist. "Fuck no," he snaps. "Not until you tell me why the fuck you lied to me."
"About who I'm going to see? Because it's none of your damn business!" I stare at him, irritation, frustration, and far more desire than I'm willing to admit crashing through my system in a tidal wave. His hands are on me. I'm in his arms again. It feels like heaven and hurts like hell at the same time.
Every part of me wants to sink my hands into his overly long hair and kiss him until it stops hurting. But I already know I won't survive that. He'll break me all over again.
"You know damn well that isn't what I mean, Dimples. Why the fuck did you lie to me back then?" He barks another humorless laugh. "Christ, I believed every fucking word from your lying mouth. Was any of it real?"
"I never lied to you," I snap.
"Right." He reaches up, the back of his fingers brushing my cheek and leaving little fires in their wake. He looks pained—like I hurt him somehow. But we both know that's a lie. He's the one who ripped my heart out. He's the one who broke me. "Not a fucking thing you said was true, was it? And I'm a fucking fool because I still can't stop thinking about you. Three goddamn years, and I still wake up with your name on my lips."
I stare up at him, shocked silent. And then cold rage sets in. "You wake up saying my name?" I ask, incredulous. "Well, good for you. At least you didn't wake up alone in my bed after giving me your virginity, just to find out from my cousin that I left the country!" I shove myself out of his arms, wheeling around to glare at him. "That's how I got to spend the morning after Lucy's wedding."
He blinks at me like I said something shocking. "What are you talking about?"
"As if you don't know." I bite the inside of my cheek, refusing to cry over that memory again here and now. This man has had more than enough of my tears. "I fell for every lie you told me, hook, line, and sinker, and the whole time, I was just a wedding hookup to you. You didn't even have the balls to tell me the truth or say goodbye. I had to find out from Haven that you left. So I don't know what your problem is now, but get over it, Ridley. I didn't come here for you. I came for Lucy. You can go to hell."
I was delusional to feel even a sliver of excitement when I saw him again in the parking lot the other day. I should have known better. If I hadn't promised Lucy to stay for Lyra's party, I'd be packing right now because this isn't what I signed up for. Seeing him again wasn't supposed to hurt like this.
I'm supposed to be strong, confident, and over him. Except…I'm very clearlynotover him. And it's been a long damn time since I felt strong and confident.
I turn to storm away, but his voice stops me.
"Paisley, wait."
I hate that I'm still weak for him. I hate that I stop. But I do.
"Is that really what you think? That I just left the country while you were in my bed?"
"No, it isn't what I think," I murmur without turning around. "It's what I know. So do us both a favor and stop acting like I did something to you. We both know you're the one who ran."
He doesn't say anything. It's not like he can anyway.
"You know the worst part, Ridley? I would have ended up in your bed even had you told me the truth. That's how hard I fell for you."
"Paisley, I–"
"Just stay the hell away from me." I shake my head tiredly, wrap my arms around myself, and walk away before he sees the tears rolling down my cheeks.
"Hey. Whoa." Oliver narrowshis eyes, his lips pulling down into a worried frown as soon as he opens the door and clocks the look on my face. "You okay, P?"
"Peachy." My quivering bottom lip gives away the lie as soon as I tell it.
He sighs, pulling me into a hug. "Ridley?" he guesses.
I lean my head against his shoulder. "Do you really need a brother, Oliver? Because beaming yours over the head with a shovel and then feeding his pieces to the sharks sounds like a good time to me right now."
Oliver's shoulders shake with laughter as he pushes the massive farmhouse door closed behind us. "How about I make you a deal? If he's still making you cry tomorrow, I'll beam him with the fucking shovel, and you and Luce can help me drive the boat out into the middle of the Pacific to feed him to the sharks."
