Page 83 of It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas
‘But who’syoursafety net?’
I swallowed and looked down. ‘Oh, I’m pretty self-sufficient. Who’s yours?’
‘My mum, without question.’
‘And do you still see your dad?’
‘A little. It’s hard. But he knows he can’t manipulate us any more, so he mainly leaves us alone. These days it’s much easier for me to see how some of his behaviours were never conscious choices on his part, but caused by stuff that went on when he was younger that he’s probably never dealt with. I guess we all have stuff like that dragging us backwards, don’t we?’
‘Yeah, tell me about it. But Elle’s always been pretty good at dragging me forwards, you know?’
‘In what way?’
‘Well, as soon as we got back to uni after Livvie’s funeral she kept taking me out, night after night. I buried myself in my studies the rest of the time. Obviously looking back I can see that Elle had thought that hoisting me up onto some kind of carousel of distraction was the right thing to do. I mean, we were both so young. I think she’d just taken it upon herself to keep my life as “normal” and positive as possible.’
‘I can see why she might have felt the need to do that, sure,’ he said.
‘Well, what was the alternative?’
‘I dunno. Just let you feel what you needed to feel, maybe?’
‘She was a teenager, not a grief counsellor. Anyway. Enough about all that. A drink for the road?’
‘Absolutely.’
Our desserts had been just as delicious as everything else. This had undoubtedly been the best meal of my life. And not just because of the food.
‘Hey, mate, can you wait here a sec while I see her in?’
The taxi driver sighed. ‘Fine, but keep it quick – this is one of my busiest nights of the year and I’m already late for my next fare.’
‘Understood.’
We jogged to the door, the icy wind that had picked up outside while we’d been in the bowels of Tapas Den making my eyes water. My tear ducts had had quite the workout today.
‘No Nutrigrains needed this time, Mal?’
‘Nope, I reckon my blood-sugar levels are pretty decent thanks to that incredible food. What an amazing place.’
‘Yeah. Soooo… how much longer will you be here for?’
In the absence of any news about Dad’s car, I had no idea.
‘Not sure. I need to give Ryan a bell tomorrow. But I imagine I’ll probably head back in the next couple of days.’
‘Okay. So… I was speaking to my mum earlier – and please,pleasefeel free to say no if this is way too much – but we wondered if you might be interested in staying in Scarnbrook a little longer so you can spend Christmas with us? That’s if you still have no plans back in London?’
Play it cool, Mally. Play. It. Cool.
‘Oh, Tom, that’s really kind of you, but I really couldn’t gate-crash your family Christmas like that.’
‘You wouldn’t be gate-crashing it at all. I mean, you’ve seen how big that turkey is, right? How are the two of us meant to munch our way through that alone? Also, I’d… I’d really like to spend the day with you.’
Say yes, Mally. Otherwise, it’ll just be you, an empty advent calendar and that chewy Pret sandwich.
‘It sounds nice, it really does, but Christmas is still a week away and I only have this place’ – I gestured behind me – ‘for a couple more days, so staying here for any longer than that isn’t really an option, I’m afraid.’
‘Yeah, you wouldn’t have to worry about that, either. Mum said she’d be happy to put you up at hers for a few nights. When I told her you were a fan of her Channel 5 films, she could barely contain her excitement. I reckon you two would probably get on like a house on fire.’
