Page 113 of Alice Carver Manifests Her Perfect Life
‘You know Matthew had a thing about you when we got together?’ he said. ‘So—’
‘Matthew?’ The sounds of the café disappeared. ‘He didn’t have a thing about me! He told you not to go there and that he’d lose all respect for you if you did.’
‘Ye-es,’ said Ollie slowly, like I was being obtuse. ‘Not to go there because he liked you.’
‘Matthew did?’
‘Yes.’
‘Sorry, are we talking about the same person? Matthew Lloyd?’
‘Matthew Lloyd liked you,’ said Ollie. ‘A lot. And he asked me to leave you alone.’
‘Seriously?’
‘Yeah. But I liked you too. So I went there anyway.’
‘Oh my god,’ I said, falling through empty space, running it over in my mind. ‘That night we got together, Matthew was warning you off? Because… he… liked… me?’
‘Yeah. I didn’t listen though. I assumed he’d get over it. Bros before hos, and all that. I was seriously mistaken.’
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’
‘Tell you what?’ said Ollie.
‘How Matthew felt about me?’
‘It was pretty obvious.’
‘Not to me,’ I said.
‘I thought you knew.’ Ollie shrugged. ‘And it seemed like you didn’t feel the same way about him. You kept going on about how I was your type – Eton boy, rugby bod, play before work, likes to party, etc.’
I momentarily shut my eyes. The irony. The efforts I expended to conceal how I felt…
Ollie looked slightly perturbed by my undoubtedly weird reaction. ‘I was hardly going to try and get you two together, was I?’ he said reasonably. ‘And it’s not like Matthew needed my help – he’s never been short of offers.’
‘Yeah, sure.’ I tried to process. I felt a little bit sick. My hand shook embarrassingly as I lifted up my beautiful, pointlessly beautiful, green enamel mug.
Ollie shifted his chair back. ‘Look, Alice, I’ve got to go and meet my girls at the park. You can come if you want?’
‘Maybe another time.’
‘It’s not my place to say this,’ said Ollie, standing up and pushing his chair under the table. ‘And I don’t know whether either of you is even single. But if he’s still this bothered, and if you are as bothered as you seem to be, that’s kind of amazing. And maybe you need to do something about it… ’
All I could think about was the White Rabbit inAlice’s Adventures in Wonderlandsaying, ‘ Oh dear! Oh dear! I shall be too late!… ’
In one word:
Blindsided
Date: Sunday 16 AprilTime: 4.20pm
My thoughts and reflections:
Mum was rearranging one of the multiple posies of primroses, forget-me-nots and grape hyacinths dotted around the house. ‘I’m just saying it’s not like Alice to turn down chocolate on Easter Sunday.’ Mum sounded offended, as though I’d just rejected her and Easter itself rather than a mini egg.
‘And she didn’t want my bacon either,’ said Dad, drying his hands on the red-and-white checked tea towel whilst the kettle whistled boisterously and the pips on Radio 4 signalled the hour. ‘I think the stress of the merger got to her, Nell. I really do.’
