Page 155 of A Winding Wave of Magic
I was interrupted by a loud snort from Caitlin.
“Or,” I continued purposefully, “you figured out a way around it. So which is it?”
She sighed, in that way that people do with very young, very naïve children. I frowned.
“It’s true. Neither Robbie nor I wanted children for a long time, and between us, we managed to keep to ourselves until we chose. We were well-matched that way. And lucky. But, Cassandra,” she said, her voice softening again, which only told me more that I was about to face yet another unpleasant truth. “You’re different.”
“You mean as an oracle?” I crossed my arms. “What does that matter?—”
I cut myself off as the realization washed over me like cold water. I wasn’t just another fae who could protect myself and shut down my abilities when I needed to. I was an open book, and my touch rendered other people the same.
A vessel, they’d said. A vector for truth. Or anything else.
I cringed. “And Jonathan knows about all of this, I presume?”
Caitlin nodded. “He does.”
Which meant he already knew there was no real chance for us. It was why he had been trying his hardest to keep anything from happening. Why his thoughts had revealed, along with his desire, underlying amazement in the fact that he literally couldn’t seem to stop himself. And why he felt so damn guilty.
“Gods.” I gave a heavy sigh. “No wonder he’s leaving. I’d steal his life, like a succubus.”
“We’re all that, when it comes down to it, Cassandra. Robbie’s taken my life and I his, and we’ve given them to our girls. I’ve got the gray hairs and sagging tits to prove it. Butit’s your power—the power of true empathy—that no one could refuse. Not when we all secretly desire another person to know us, deep down.”
Like Jonathan knew me. He touched me and didn’t just know my thoughts, but everything I thought and felt. For whatever reason, empathy went both ways with him.
“If I do know him that way, he’ll die?” I asked.
“No,you’lldie,” she corrected me. “Jonathan’s worried more about that than anything else, as are we all. You must manifest, Cassandra. For everyone’s sake.”
Suddenly, I was on a hill facing the shadowed man, holding Gran’s mysterious box under one arm, my other hand stretched out toward an army of darkness. The vision was fleeting, too fleeting to know if I was preparing myself to accept their energy or shielding my booty from them.
I blinked and was back in the room, with Caitlin watching me sharply.
“What was it?” she demanded. “You’re scared now. Confused.”
I leaned forward and rocked my throbbing head into my hands. It felt the same as when I woke up after a vivid dream—only this time it had happened in broad daylight.
In stunted language, I managed to tell her what I’d Seen. “What is happening to me?”
“You’ve had a vision,” Caitlin said. “Of the future. Your eyes flashed white, same as happens to Enda when she gets them.”
“It was—I—” I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to recall the fleeting scene, hoping Caitlin could See it if I was consciously recalling it.
It worked.
“Ah,” she said. “Yes, that’s quite a fate.”
I didn’t know what I was doing at that moment. But even in that flash, I knew that I was the only person who could do it, whatever it was I was doing.
“But you do understand?” Caitlin asked. “Why it’s so important? That you and Jon…”
I stared at the dusty floorboards for what seemed like minutes before finally releasing my head and sitting up. When I answered, my voice sounded lower, heavy with a burden I still didn’t quite understand, but which I knew without a doubtI must carry.
“Yes,” I said quietly. “I understand.” I got up and went to the window, where the sight of the rolling waves calmed my confusion.“You should probably go now. I need to sort some things out if I’m to start my meditation in the morning.”
Caitlin shut the door behind her. Woodenly, I washed, then dried our dishes. Then I returned to the couch and sat there for hours, staring at the window, the fireplace, not really knowing what I was seeing. Occasionally, a vision would spring from my touch, but otherwise, I was too numb to See anything.
The sun was beginning to set. Somehow an entire day had passed in the space of a few minutes. I felt like it had run me over like a truck.
