Page 43 of Coach Me
“Don’t you have a list?”
“Sort of. I think it’s more guidelines really.”
Jensen tosses another fry in her mouth. “Run me through them again.”
“We’ve got: venture out more, have a yes day, find a hobby, be more spontaneous, and do something I’m scared of.” I tap my finger on each task to make sure I remember all five. I should probably have an official list or something.
“Okay, it seems a little broad. Venture out more? How are you going to venture out? Venturing out to the bar and venturing to the park are two very different levels in my opinion.”
“Why can’t I venture to both places? The different levels are the whole point. I go to bars with Reagan, and she usually orders my drink without asking me. I go to the park—if we’re being honest, I don’t remember the last time I’ve been to a park. But I want to find out. Maybe I’m one of those people who enjoys those park workouts—but I don’t know because Reagan hates things that make her sweaty, and Will would rather workout at one of the many top-of-the-line facilities he has access to.”
Jensen laughs. “Okay, I’m understanding a little more. So, each item isn’t limited to a one-time thing.”
“Right, well, except maybe the yes day. Those may be a little more restricted to a once every couple of months deal.” I shrug. “Saying yes to myself every single time will result in debt that even Will couldn’t pay off.”
“Maybe it doesn’t have to be yes to monetary things. What about just saying yes more, in general? Like yes to a bubble bath, yes to the whole tub of ice cream in the freezer… Oh, yes to a date! When’s the last time you went on a date?”
My mouth forms a thin line as I think. I guess it has been a while since I’ve been on a date. “I was casually texting oneof the teachers that I used to work with, but he ended up ghosting me.”
Jensen snorts. “Classy.”
I wave my hand off. “As you can see, I’m clearly heartbroken over it. It also solidified my need for these guidelines. That’s the third time I’ve been ghosted this year alone. I’ve had some boyfriends over the past but nothing…”
“Toe-curling?”
“Well, yes, but nothing describes it best. Most guys I’ve texted with seem to end up ghosting, and the two true boyfriends I can recall…well, I just feel like I wasn’t really heartbroken over them, ya know? It seems the common denominator is me. Maybe I’m too boring, I don’t know.”
“Okay, so why not add a spicy side to your list? Venture out more in your dating life. Be Spicy Lucie. Maybe even be a princess who cusses.” Her mouth opens in fake shock.
I roll my eyes, tempted to toss a fry at her. “With what time? Remember I’m going to be getting like two days off in the month. It’s fine, really. I think I need to figure myself out before I add dating to it.”
“Um, figuring out what you like in the bedroom is part of yourself, actually.”
She’s got me there.
“How about this—hand me a napkin.” Jensen digs in her purse when I drop a clean napkin in front of her. After pulling out a Sharpie, she grabs the napkin and starts scribbling away.
“Jen—”
She waves her hand, cutting me off. “Shh, I don’t want to lose my ideas.”
Sitting back in my chair, I let herwork.
“Okay, here. As your accountability friend, I insist you add these. Consider it theLucie After Darkside of your list.”
Picking up the napkin, I look at the barely legible list—goodness. “Ya know, for a tattoo artist, your penmanship needs work.”
“Oh bite me, I was working with a Sharpie and a napkin.”
I chuckle and go back to her list.Try different toys. Find a kink you like. Sexually inspiring outings.
“Okay, what exactly is a ‘sexually inspiring outing’?”
“It could be anything. I tried to be broad, like the rest of your list. You could take a pole dancing class, you could get your nipples pierced, go buy some lingerie, or have a one-night stand. And before you argue, you said you’d have some nights off—women need to not be so judged for them anyway. I had to throw it out there.”
“You’re right, you’re right. Not sure if it’s exactly my style, but I can respect the point.”
“And hey, none of these things require another person anyway. You can do them all yourself or with someone, but either way, you still get to the core of Lucie.”
