Page 99 of Say Yes to the Nemesis
I like her. No, scratch that. I amobsessedwith her. All I want is to be around this girl.
This isn’t just a hookup. This is the beginning of the end. Because if I want Wren for real… I might lose everything else.
Fuck. Do I have feelings for Wren?
twenty-seven
WREN
It started as a game.A way to stay on the show. But now I don’t know where the fake ends and the real begins.
I feel like Ryan doesn’t know where the borders are, either.
When he asks me to spend the weekend with him, I mean to say no. At least IthinkI mean to. I’ve spent years saying no to myself. To the wild, selfish parts of me that want things I’m not supposed to want.
But Ryan leans in at the end of a long, brutal day, all cocky grin and tired eyes, and murmurs, “Let’s get out of here this weekend. Just you and me. Somewhere nobody can find us.”
I blink at him. “What?”
“No cameras. No producers. No contestants fake-laughing at everything I say. Just quiet. Just us.” He says it like it’s simple. Like the answer should be easy.
And the worst part is… it is.
I can’t quite bring myself to turn down the chance to be somewhere secret and safe with him for a whole weekend. My world has been reduced to cameras and those who wield them like weapons. To people like Rich, who see everything but never truly see me.
I try to laugh it off. “Jay would kill you.”
“What Jay doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” He’s teasing, but I see something serious flicker in his eyes. Something tender. Something that scares me more than the rest.
“Come on, Rustin.” His voice drops. “Let me steal you for forty-eight hours. Just to see what it feels like when it’s not a game.”
I’m supposed to be running the other way. Supposed to be throwing myself fully into untangling my life, not knotting it tighter. But when Ryan says, “You want this, too. I know you do,” there’s a treacherous, exhilaratingyesthat comes flying out before I can even think.
“Yeah.” My voice is soft. “I want to.”
And God help me, I mean it.
I’m already too attached, thinking of how good it will feel to be off the grid, then back on it again. Already too attached to the image of twenty-three missed texts from Jay, half of them in all caps.
WHERE ARE YOU
WHY IS RYAN GONE TOO
CALL ME RIGHT NOW
I imagine walking back into the studio, my skin sun-warmed and smile impossible to hide. And it won’t be as someone’s assistant. Or someone’s little sister. It’ll be as someone who did something wild and dangerous just for herself.
Already too attached to the idea of vanishing. Driving to the coast with the windows down, sneaking into overpriced hotels with Ryan’s hand in mine and not a single plan in place. Already too attached to the picture in my head of Jay huddled over his phone next to Calla, too anxious that I’m gone to be angry for real.
I say yes. Because I know better. But I decide it’s worth the risk to find out if I mean it at all.
Even though Jay is going to freak if Ryan disappears and I vanish at the same time. Even though I’ve known Ryan practically my whole life. Even though I’m already too attached.
Too attached to this overwhelming feeling of freedom. This wild, reckless chance to turn my back on everything pristine and expected for a little while.
Ryan doesn’t tell me where we’re going. I lie awake the night before with butterflies the size of planets in my stomach. He just texts me the name of a hotel and a time.
10 a.m. sharp. Pack something soft. Something that’ll make me regret ever teasing you.
