Page 45 of Mountain Freedom
First thing in the morning, I would go to Greg and tell him everything. It was one thing when Russell was just harassing me. It was another thing altogether for him to involve Allison. And considering the conflict of interest, I couldn’t investigatethis alone. Maybe not at all, depending on how Greg decided to handle it. It might be out of my hands completely come tomorrow.
Though that sure wouldn’t stop me from looking into things in my off time. Or spending as much time as possible with Allison to make sure she was safe.
Part of me wanted to rush out to find Russell right now and demand that he tell me where he had been tonight. But I knew that was a rash decision. The worst thing I could do was leave Allison alone right now. Partly because it was clear as all get-out that she wouldn’t know how to defend herself if whoever this was broke back in again. And partly because I had seen the fear on her face when she thought I was leaving. She had put on a brave front, pretending she was blowing the whole thing off as a nosy neighbor. But the truth was in her eyes. This had shaken her more than she wanted to admit.
When she said she was going to go to bed, it was clear as day she was too nervous to actually sleep. So I’d sit here and watch every Jane Austen movie there was with her until she was relaxed enough to actually rest, if that’s what it took.
But it only took thirty minutes for her to fall asleep, curled up in a tight ball on the other end of the couch. I couldn’t bring myself to wake her, so I covered her with the blanket she had brought for me, turned the TV off, and stretched out on the rug beside the couch.
I stared at her for a little while, wondering if this was what it was like for couples like Willa and Cole. Feeling so comfortable and safe with your partner that you just relaxed and fell asleep easily.
Allison wouldn’t know this, but I had never spent the night with a woman before. It was a firm rule I had with dates. No sleeping over. The nightmares that still occasionally plagued me were too humiliating. I would never want a date to witness that.
Yet here I was, volunteering to spend the night at Allison’s house, and not even bothering to make sure we were in separate rooms. Somehow, I knew I wouldn’t have nightmares tonight. Not with her right there. I had stayed to make her feel safe, but something about her presence made me feel safe too.
The floor was hard, but the pillow smelled like her. And before long, I was deep into the most restful sleep I’d had in years. Instead of nightmares, my dreams were sweet—and they all featured a certain golden-haired beauty curled up beside me.
I wokethe next morning to Allison’s surprised cry. “What is it?” I asked, jumping up.
“I’m so sorry!” she said. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep here. Did you sleep on the floor all night?”
I stretched out, popping my back and neck. “Yeah. It’s fine.”
“It’s not fine,” she said, giving me a stern look, “and based on the sounds your body is making, I’m the worst doctor in the world for making you do that.”
“You didn’t make me.” I rubbed my hand over my face, trying to wake up. “You were sleeping so peacefully I couldn’t bring myself to wake you.” I opened my eyes to see her smiling at me.
“That’s sweet of you,” she said. “But next time? Wake me. And sit up, with your back to me.”
I gave her a confused look but did what she’d said. She immediately put her hands on my neck, startling me.
“Good grief,” she said. “You’re ridiculously knotted up. Jackson, I’m so sorry. Let me see if I can work some of these out for you.” She went to work kneading the knots in my neck with her thumbs, providing both pain and relief at the same time.
“Um. Thanks,” I said, reminding myself that she was a doctor who probably didn’t think twice about putting her hands on her patients. I, on the other hand, had just spent a night envelopedin her incredible scent, sleeping close enough to her that I had to stop myself from reaching up and pulling her down on top of me, and now her hands were doing magical things to my neck.
She trusted me, and I’d die before breaking that trust. So I jumped up, away from those hands I wanted on me more than I could possibly say. “Coffee,” I said, struggling to speak. “Need coffee.”
She gave me a weird look. “Oh. Yeah, of course. I’ll put on a pot. Are you one of those people who can’t even string a sentence together in the mornings without it?”
I nodded, even though it wasn’t true at all. I loved my coffee, but I often went on my morning run before I had my first cup. Caffeine deprivation wasn’t the reason I was flustered beyond belief this morning, but it made a damn good excuse. An excuse that didn’t break our pact.
I foldedup the blanket and hid in the bathroom like a coward while Allison made coffee. The guilt was killing me. I had to get over these feelings she was stirring up in me.
Was it just because I couldn’t have her? I thought it over as I did my best at brushing my teeth with some toothpaste on my finger. As an adult, I’d never really wanted a relationship. Never imagined a future with anyone or thought about what it might be like to set up house and start a family. Those dreams had died for me a long time ago.
But all of a sudden, my brain was trying to convince me I wanted the American dream after all. Was it because she was off-limits?
No. It was because she was her.
I sighed, splashing my face with cold water. “You need to get over this,” I warned my reflection in the mirror. That kind of lifewasn’t meant for a man like me, and I’d made Allison a promise. I wasn’t going to mess things up now.
I just had to survive coffee, breakfast, and driving her to the clinic. Then I could get some space and finally think straight again.
Any reliefI expected to feel when I dropped Allison off at the clinic was short-lived. I missed her like crazy the minute she was gone. When she climbed out of my truck, waved goodbye, and shot me a little smile over her shoulder as she disappeared into the clinic, it felt like the world had suddenly gotten darker and colder all at once, as if the sun had disappeared behind the clouds.
Allison was my sun. And that was a very dangerous thing.
But I had work to do, and while I hated that the work involved her, I was glad to have a distraction. I drove straight to the office and went right to Sheriff Morrison’s door.
