Page 122 of Shadow Sabotage
I’d spent more time than I cared to admit imagining what it might be like if Vance took me to bed. The reality had been a thousand times better than anything I could have dreamed up.
There had been no rush, no frenzy—at least not the first time. Vance had taken his time, focusing that same patient intensity on me that I’d seen him apply to his work. He’d teased and touched every inch of my body until I begged him for release.
He’d only smirked and continued that exquisite slowness, holding himself back until I’d exploded in ecstasy.
Thenhe’d ravished me with all the furious, fast energy I could ever desire.
But this—the sweet intimacy of him holding me against his chest the next morning—was the best part of all.
“I hate to leave,” he whispered in my ear.
“I know.”
“I’ll call you when I get back into town next week. Maybe you can drive down to Laramie and spend a night.”
“Yeah.” But my answer was hollow. Rhett and Cheyenne would be on their honeymoon. The ranch would need every minute I could spare. I wouldn’t be able to get away for a trip to Laramie, much less New York when he settled there.
I was crazy about Vance, but I knew there was no telling when we’d actually be together again. My life stretched out ahead of me, empty and sad.
Lonely.
Chapter Forty-Five
Vance
I watchedthe cityscape out my window as the plane made its final approach to Laguardia. I was finally home, back where I belonged.
But instead of the excitement I’d expected to feel, all I felt was emptiness.
It would be better when I got to the FBI field office, I assured myself. It was natural to feel a sense of sadness. After all, I’d genuinely loved Wyoming. It would always hold a piece of my heart.
Or all of it, I thought glumly, since the odds of Claire ever wanting to move to the city were less than zero.
She’d hate living here. I couldn’t fool myself into thinking there was even a chance of her wanting to move her life to the city. She might enjoy an occasional visit. I could take her to Central Park. We could eat hot dogs, see the sights. Order cheap takeout and pair it with a five-hundred-dollar bottle of scotch just for the hell of it.
Just thinking about it put a smile on my face.
But my smile disappeared the moment I stepped outside of the terminal and hailed a cab. Had New York always been this crowded? It was a shock to the system afterbeing in the wide-open land of Wyoming.
It was too early to check into my hotel, so I had the cab drop me off a couple of blocks from the FBI field office. I slung my messenger bag over my shoulder and began my walk, glad for the chance to stretch my legs after my flight.
Horns blared, tires screeched, and a man shouted profanities at someone who had cut him off. Sirens wailed in the distance, and a jackhammer pounded incessantly.
What the hell was I doing here?
I stopped in my tracks in front of the federal building where I was supposed to report. It loomed above me, bringing back memories of my dad. It had always seemed so important then. So defining. Part of me had always thought that if I made it there, I’d know I was as good as him. That it would make us cut from the same cloth, give us an identity to share that went beyond biology.
But I didn’t want to be cut from the same cloth as him.
In a moment of clarity that felt like a lightning strike to the soul, I realized following in his footsteps would prove nothing—except that his opinion still held entirely too much control over my life. Yes, he’d had an amazing career. But that’s all he had.
I wanted way more than that.
Chapter Forty-Six
Claire
Cole’s visitand Cheyenne’s wedding preparation kept me busy enough that I didn’t have much time to think about Vance’s absence. But when the ceremony was over and I was no longer needed for maid-of-honor duties, I snagged a glass of champagne and slipped away from the reception for a moment alone.
