Page 40 of Tainted Love
“You good, man?”
No.
“Yeah, I’m good.”
Bea thinks she can stay away from me. That’s cute. It won’t last for long.
Chapter 23
Bea
WAKING UP ALONE after being thoroughly fucked by my stepbrother in the shower has me all caught up in my head. What the hell was that last night? Was it a dream? The lingering scent of Elias on my sheets and the ache between my thighs tells me otherwise.
Guilt festers inside of me. I need to get out of the house and process what we’ve done and the implications it will have for our new family. After quickly dressing in my gym gear, I grab my keys, headphones, and phone, and head for the gym.
As my luck is so freaking bad, of course I run into said stepbrother on the stairs my way out, along with two of his bandmates. Unsure how to act around him after what we did, I go straight on the defensive. I hate that his friends seem to know what happened between us—even if Elias tries to deny it.
But the thing that frustrates me the most is how my body still reacts to his presence. He seems to know it, too. I’m convinced Elias is the proverbial forbidden fruit put here to tempt me into damnation. He’s a drug, and I keep succumbing to my addiction—even though I know Ishouldn’t. I’m a victim of his obsession with me, but I have no self-preservation when he's around. I free fall into his orbit of sin and debauchery with no thought of how our actions will hurt those around us.
That fact is glaringly obvious after our video call with our parents. What we did last night can’t happen again. We can’t hurt our parents, not when they’re so happy together. I can’t deny how happy my dad seems, now he is focussed on something other than work, and I can’t be the reason to tear that away. I can’t break his heart.
I need to keep some distance between me and Elias, even if the stubborn bastard won’t listen to me. I’ve already allowed things to go too far, but nothing else can happen. Sleeping with him once was a mistake, something we can put down to raging hormones and sexual tension. However, twice is a choice, and I won’t allow it.
Now I need to get that through to Elias.
And my traitorous body.
Goddamn it.
I take fifteen minutes to drive to the gym, and the whole way there I try to figure out how I can get out of going to this fundraiser without telling my dad the truth. I can’t go with Elias as the more time I spend with him, the more I want a repeat of last night. Not to mention stepbrother dearest isn’t exactly subtle in his attention toward me, and Granddad is a very astute man. The last thing I want is for Jonathon Kirkland to get suspicious about what is going on.
Once I pull into a parking spot, I rest my forehead on the steering wheel. I’m so fucked. I completely understand why this is such a big deal for Elias. Forever Summer is a great band, and they deserve their big break, but why do I have to be collateral damage?
Granddad is generally a reasonable man, but somethingtells me engaging in any type of relationship with my stepbrother would cross a line in his books.
Manic laughter bubbles up inside of me. A relationship? Oh god, I really have lost it if class whatever this fucked up situation is between us as anything close to a relationship. I’m delusional if I think Elias wants anything more than being able to tell his friends that he banged his stepsister. I’m nothing but a conquest to him … a pawn in his game until he tires of me, or someone new comes along who catches his attention.
How did my life get so complicated?
I return from Europe to have a new insta-family and a stepbrother who has me so sexually frustrated I’ve lost all sense. Shit, I haven’t even started university yet. Maybe the distraction of school is what I need to stop overthinking this situation with Elias.
Releasing a deep sigh, I climb out of my car and walk over to the entrance of the gym. When I push the door open, my ears are assaulted with upbeat music which vibrates through my body. I make my way over to the front desk to reactivate my membership, but I almost turn around and walk out when I see who’s working behind the desk.
“Beatrice!” Sophie Palmer practically screeches. “Oh my gosh, I saw you were back. How was your year off? I’m so jealous.”
I repress my eye roll and plaster on a fake smile—I swear I’m getting better at these lately. “Hey, Sophie,” I greet the girl from my high school. “I didn’t realise you worked here.”
“I’m just helping my brother. He bought the gym last year,” she explains with a shrug of her shoulders.
“Rowan bought the gym?”
“Uh huh. After the accident he couldn’t play professional sport anymore. So Daddy let him use his inheritance to buy the gym.”
“Wow,” I somehow manage to choke out. I hadn’t realisedhis accident in our final year of high school had impacted him that badly. “Good for him. Well, I was just hoping to renew my mem?—”
“Alison told me you and Hunter broke up,” Sophie interrupts, pouring on the contrived sympathy, but she doesn’t let me respond before she continues. “She also said you’d moved on with the lead singer of Forgotten Sunrises.”
“Forever Summer,” I correct her automatically, mentally kicking myself when her eyes light up. Sophie and her best friend Alison Fewster were the two biggest gossips at our high school.
