Locking my phone, I slide it across the bench and blow on my coffee, feeling like I’ve been caught with my hand in the cookie jar.
“My head feels like it has a herd of tiny, loud and obnoxious children running through it. Fuck my life. Please tell me you have some more of that strong coffee for me.” Arrie groans, and I can’t stop the smile that splits my face.
Our eyes lock and a sense of guilt washes through me. I don’t usually keep anything from Arrie, but the Tin-Man feels like a secret I want to keep a little longer for myself. Something for me.
“You know I got you, Arrie baby.”
She shakes her head.
“Don’t start with your cheerful bullshit. How in the fuck do you never get hungover? Tell me your secrets, bitch. What witchery are you using?”
She takes a seat at the small table and yawns while I laugh at her.
“It’s called drinking water, girl. Duh”
“Hush your hole and pour me a fucking coffee.”
Turning away from her, I start pouring the leftover coffee in her cup, adding a teaspoon sugar and some cream to it like she likes it. My thoughts are relentless, plaguing me, and my palms itch with the need to reply to him. It’s probably best Arrie walked in when she did. I mentally try to convince myself; he’s not calling the shots here, I’m the one in control.
Placing down the cup, I knock my hip into her shoulder, and she curses me.
“Don’t be a cunty hole,” she growls, reaching for the cupand takes a sip. “So fucking good. This is the only reason I haven’t killed you this morning.”
“Yeah. Right. The only reason.”
I take a seat, and we sit in comfortable silence, both lost in our thoughts.
I hesitate for a couple more beats.Fuck it.
“So… What are you going to do about Adam… and Connor?”
Her gaze meets mine, and I regret asking her when a tear slides down her face, but she can’t keep this bottled up. She’s my cousin, my best friend, and if anyone can help her through this, it’s me. I need her to open up before this shit swallows her into a deep, black hole she can’t claw her way out of.
Releasing a sigh, she takes another sip of her coffee before replying.
“I don’t - don’t know. Connor messaged me last night to see how I was. He asked me what was up with Adam, because he was ghosting him. I told him that we broke up. He didn’t know.”
“Really? They’ve been friends their entire life. He allowed things to progress to that level, and now he’s pissed at you two? I know for a fact neither of you would have done anything if he didn’t consent to it. That’s not who you or Connor are.”
“Yeah…”
“But?”
“I instigated it, Dottie. I shouldn’t have wrestled with Connor, and when I felt him on top of me… hard. Fuck. I feel like I’m cheating on Adam just talking about it and we aren’t even together!” she yells, her frustration taking over.
Reaching over with my free hand, I place it over hers.
“Don’t you dare fucking do this to yourself. You did nothing wrong. Adam is being childish. He was turned on by the action, hell, he allowed his best friend and girlfriend tomasturbate together, and now he’s hating himself. You know why?”
Arrie shakes her head.
“He hates that he liked it. That deep down he wants to share you with him, but his jealousy, ego, and pigheadedness is riding shotgun.”
Arrie’s eyes bug wide.
“Do you really believe that?”
“Yeah. Adam has always been possessive when it comes to you.”